“I buried myself in research because it was a way to hide from the world, Aleksei.” She wanted to give him truth. To give both of them truth. “I thought if I became a wife and mother I wouldn’t want to do that anymore, but the research I’m doing is important and I’m good at it.”
“You mean the research you are doing with Gary?”
She winced at the mention of his name and then she realized, it was the first time she’d thought about him since Aleksei had returned. She took in a deep breath and let it out. She’d let her dream go. She’d let go of Gary. She loved him. She would always love him. She would always feel as if she had a connection to him, but Trixie was right. She loved him, but she wasn’t in love with him.
She was beginning to believe she had no idea what love was, but she wanted to wrap her life around Aleksei. She wanted to feel just like she did at this very moment. Part of him. Complete with him. Sated. Elated. She loved to see that look on his face. The total focus on her. The approval. The urgent need.
“He lost his emotions and his ability to see in color all at once. I saw his face. His eyes. He is lost to our research and that makes it all the more important that I carry on,” she said. “I think he knew, maybe had precognition. I never knew what exactly his psychic abilities were. We never talked about them.”
She realized that was true as well. They had discussed research and Carpathians and problems with babies endlessly, but they didn’t share details of their personal lives with each other.
“So are you telling me you would like to make your home in the Carpathian Mountains near the prince? Is that where you have set up your laboratory?”
His voice was strictly neutral. She had no idea if he was for or against the idea. She bit her lip, torn between telling him the truth and guessing at what he wanted.
“Gabrielle.” This time his voice was commanding. Authoritative.
Her heart nearly exploded out of her chest. She loved that tone. She loved how he could go from looking so gentle, almost loving, to a dark, scary predator. She knew she was safe with him, so that only enhanced the sensual, very sexy attractiveness. His voice thrilled her, sent fingers of desire down her spine, up her thighs and pulsing through her sex.
“The truth is, Aleksei, I don’t know. I want to be decisive, but I don’t know where I want to live. I know I need to work. I know it’s important to make certain our women can conceive, carry a baby, feed the baby naturally, and that we can produce female children who live more than a year. It wasn’t just one problem to be fixed. There are many reasons why this happened to the Carpathian species. Xavier attacked from many angles and he was successful. It will take a lot of work to figure out all the various things he did and find a way to reverse them.”
“And you can do that?” There was admiration in his voice. “I have myself a very smart lifemate.”
She found herself glowing inside. She loved that he thought she was intelligent.
“I really believe I can help. I don’t know about actually figuring out every thread and eradicating it, but I’d like to try.”
“Fane told me his woman will need to return to the United States very soon, along with Andre and her granddaughter. I will be needed here until another can take over guarding the gate and the ancients within. If Teagan can actually do as she thinks she can and help those remaining be able to leave this place seeking their lifemates, we will be able to leave.”
“That was why Gary was sent here. He was to find out if our healers could do the same for other hunters or if only Teagan could.” She didn’t realize she had used the term our until after she said the words. More and more she was beginning to accept that she was Carpathian, not human. “Josef, one of the younger Carpathians but very skilled in technology, has a database of psychic women and where they live. Carpathians are trying to get to them to protect them. The vampires as well as the human society of assassins are also hunting them. If Teagan can give them the time, it’s possible I can point them in the direction of their lifemates.”
“How?” He sounded neutral again.
“I have this strange gift. It’s never really been good for much, but I can be with someone and look at a map and know they should go to a certain spot, that if they do, something amazing will happen to them. I don’t know if it would really help, but if I had the addresses on a map and the ancient standing in front of me, it might work.”
His hand smoothed over her hair. “You are a miracle, Gabrielle.”
“It might not work,” she pointed out. “I always kind of considered the ability a silly parlor trick. I never thought about it before—putting an ancient in the general vicinity of a potential lifemate.”