She hated that. She hated that Gary had given so much of himself to the Carpathians and now he had lost all of himself. She lifted her chin and stepped close to him. She scented something wild—feral. A trapped animal not familiar with civilization. Gary. Her Gary. So far gone. So out of reach.
Andre and Fane had gone to their women, allowing her a little privacy with Gary. His eyes moved over her face. Impassive. Cool. Remote. She reached out for Aleksei in her mind, needing his strength to get through this.
“You were amazing. Thank you for coming to our aid.”
“I had to know you were all right, Gabrielle.”
She shivered at the coldness in his eyes. Her Gary was gone for all time. In his eyes burned the hell of centuries of darkness—of battles. He had become a vessel for the ancients, and there was no turning that around and bringing the man she knew back.
She stepped close to him, trying to find the man she loved. Would always love. He was in there somewhere. The gentle soul whose brain had no match. “Gary.” She said his name softly, trying to call him back to her. Away from the terrible, unrelenting darkness she’d seen in the ancients there in the monastery.
“Are you happy? Is he a good lifemate to you?”
She shivered and wrapped her arms around herself. Even his voice was different. She had to work to fight back the tears. She nodded. “He’s very good to me, Gary. She’s out there. For you. Your lifemate.”
His eyes changed color again, bleak and cold and gone from her. The ancients with their despair of finding a lifemate were already working at him. She knew dawn was close and all of them would have to go to ground. Light was streaking through the gray, heralding the sun. Still . . .
“Teagan helped the ancients, Gary. It is possible she could aid you to hold on. Let us try for you. Trixie can match your song . . .”
“It is not mine alone.”
Gabrielle glanced back at Trixie. The other two women were already pressing close.
“It is all yours,” Trixie replied softly. “I see the notes, and they were originally others’, but they’ve blended with your original song and made another completely different one, unique only to you. Let us try. You saved my life. You saved my granddaughter. Please. Allow us to do this for you.”
Gabrielle could see Gary didn’t hold out any hope. She had to fight to keep her hands to herself when she wanted to take his arm and tug until he went with them to the map of the world still drawn on the ground.
“It might be worse to know she isn’t there,” Gary ventured.
“Nothing can be worse than where you are,” Aleksei said. “I know. No hope. Only unrelenting darkness. Not even the whisper of temptation. So far gone you know you cannot be around anyone without risking your honor. Give this to them. If not for you, then for them. For Gabrielle.”
Gabrielle loved him for that alone and she had to tell him. Say it. Make it understood that even though Gary stood right before her and she ached for him, wept for him, it was Aleksei. It’s you I love.
I know, kislány, I feel it. I am in your mind, holding you tight to me. He is close to agreeing. We do not have much time before the dawn is upon us. As old as we are, it is nearly impossible to stand even the early morning sun. Persuade him. There was a pause. Without touching him.
She hadn’t even realized she was reaching out toward Gary as if she could hold back the darkness in him. She jerked her hand back and pressed her palm tight against her thigh. “Please,” she said softly. “Just do this. If it doesn’t work, well, at least you tried. Even if we can’t find a direction for a lifemate, Teagan can ease the darkness just a little.”
“For you, Gabrielle.”
At least the memory of her was still there in his mind. Aiding him in some way. He might not be able to feel the love he had for her, but he remembered it. He had remembered enough to care if she was all right and to do this for her.
Teagan beckoned him toward the map, obviously hoping with him so close to it, they could manage the process faster. Trixie was already tuned to his song and she pushed the notes toward Gabrielle. Gary’s song was dark and foreboding—every bit as dangerous as that of any of the ancients who had been locked away in the monastery. That hurt.
Gabrielle held herself together by leaning on Aleksei’s strength. He was there, in her mind, holding her tight. She knew he wanted to be close to her and that it took tremendous discipline for him to hold himself physically away from her. She loved him all the more that he did—that he gave her this time with Gary. That he gave Gary what he needed as well.
Teagan’s hands moved through her stones, seeking the one that would fit Gary. Gabrielle held her breath, praying silently that something would be right. She hadn’t considered that Teagan might not have what he needed. She’d been in the mountains, collecting various stones that spoke to her, but what if . . .