MaryAnn willed her to understand and see what she was saying, because Solange was bitter and bitterness eventually ruined lives. You're too good a woman to live your life that way, honey. She wished she could take away all those terrible memories, all the tragedy that had befallen the two of them. Solange had been rescuing female captives from the jaguar-men for some time. She'd seen too much death and brutality, There were no policemen on the corners to call. It was a life-and-death struggle in the rain forest, and Solange had managed not only to survive, but to save many other women as well.
"Maybe you're right," Solange agreed. "I keep thinking eventually Jasmine and I have to leave this place. It's my home and I love it, but if we keep up this fight, we'll eventually be killed. They already know us and our reputation."
It was logical, but more than that, the fight with the jaguar-men colored every aspect of their life. "It isn't the best place for Jasmine," MaryAnn agreed.
Solange nodded. "I know. We've known for some time that we have to find another home, haven't we, Jazz?" She ruffled her cousin's hair.
There was too much sorrow in Solange, as if a great weight sat on her shoulders. She was younger than MaryAnn, and that was shocking. She looked older, her face serious and womanly rather than innocent, but she had to be only a few years older than Jasmine.
"We've talked about it," Jasmine admitted, "but where would we go? Neither of us could live in a city, so close to other people."
"Juliette said that Riordan had a house built on their ranch property for us," Solange said, her voice ultracasual. "We might try it."
Jasmine stiffened and shook her head mutely.
MaryAnn was too adept at reading people. Solange did not want to go to the ranch. She had such a distrust of men, and the De La Cruz main home was a working ranch with men everywhere. But it would place both women under the protection and eye of the De La Cruz brothers, all of whom took their roles very seriously. Solange was worried about Jasmine. If she knew about the pregnancy, as MaryAnn suspected, she would want to take Jasmine to the comparative safety of the ranch house.
"Have you met Rafael and Colby?" MaryAnn asked. "Colby's younger brother Paul and her sister Ginny are living at the ranch. They seem to really love it there. Ginny is particularly wild about horses."
Solange sent her a grateful smile. "Ginny is still young, right? I've heard Juliette talk about her. Eleven or twelve maybe."
"It's not going to work, Solange," Jasmine said. "I'm not going to go to the ranch without you."
"Did I say without me? I would go, too, if you did," Solange said. "And you're not eating enough to keep a bird alive. Eat."
Jasmine scowled as she took a banana. "You'd go to the ranch, Solange, but you wouldn't stay there and you know it. You'd leave me with Juliette and come back to the rain forest and try to work here by yourself."
Solange sat back in her chair and regarded Jasmine with a sober face. "I said I'd go with you and I will. I'll try to stay. That's all I can promise. I'll try to stay. I thought we'd be safe here, but if the jaguar-men know of this house and that most of the time the De La Cruz brothers aren't using it, they'll come for us. Maybe we should go back with Juliette and Riordan when they go."
MaryAnn caught the underlying anxiety. Solange didn't believe for a moment that she would be able to stay at the ranch, but for Jasmine, she would try.
"What do you fear at the ranch the most?" She leaned her chin into her palm and studied Solange's face. Jasmine would never stay if her cousin didn't.
Solange was silent for so long MaryAnn was afraid she wouldn't answer. "I am not good with people. Men especially. I get claustrophobia in confined spaces. I haven't had anyone telling me what to do since I was about twelve, and I can't imagine living in a place with rules-someone else's rules. I've made my own for too long and I can't fit in anywhere." She looked at Jasmine. "I don't want that for you, Jazz. You deserve a life."
"So do you," MaryAnn said quietly-firmly.
"I'm not such a nice person," Solange said, her amber eyes going flat and hard. "I've done things and I can't take them back."
Jasmine put her hand over Solange's. "You saved lives."
"And I took them."
There was no regret in her voice, and none on her face, but MaryAnn could feel the sadness coming off her in waves. She was a warrior, and there was nowhere in the world left for a woman like Solange.
"Don't feel sorry for me," Solange said. "I made my choices."
"And I've always made mine," Jasmine asserted. "I stay with you. Here or at the ranch, or wherever. We're family and we stick close. Juliette feels the same way. She can't join us during the days, but she's with us when she can be."