His fingers curled around the nape of her neck. "That matters little to me. Your safety and happiness are more important than anything else."
"Riordan said you could still turn vampire."
"You misunderstood." His fingers began a slow massage to ease the tension out of her. "We are bound together. I cannot turn. I will choose a life with you, whether it is here or in your beloved city of Seattle." He flashed her a smile. "See? I am beginning to be able to read your mind at will, too."
"What does that mean? I don't understand."
"I will grow old and die as you do. The lycan have longevity as well, but not as Carpathians. When you give up life, so will I."
She was silent, studying his face, probing his mind. Delving deep, she found-the wolf. She had known all along it was emerging, but now she could feel its powerful presence. With that combined with his Carpathian characteristics, Manolito would be a difficult man to handle. It was fortunate she had her wolf to help guide her.
"I want to go back to Seattle to see my family often," she said.
"Of course."
"And you will be charming and not at all bossy."
His eyebrow shot up. "It is always said that I am a charming man."
"By whom? You and your brothers?" She gave a delicate sniff of disbelief. "When we go visit, you have to act civilized and not at all like a Carpathian or a wolf. I don't want my mother upset."
"Are you going to ask her questions?"
"I don't know. I haven't decided yet. But I do know if Solange and Jasmine stay in Brazil, wherever they are,
they really need help. I think we should try to have a home near them as well as in the States."
"I agree, and that is a perfect solution. Jasmine wants to go to the ranch, but Solange, I think, will be a problem. And in truth, MaryAnn, I do not believe she should ever be near my eldest brother, Zacarias. He does not take no for an answer, and she would judge him very harshly, not understanding that his word had to be, and continues to have to be, law. He was what kept us all from turning vampire. The darkness is in him, and we all tread softly to try to keep from pushing him over the edge."
She could feel his sorrow and worry for his oldest brother. He obviously loved and respected Zacarias above all others. She brushed back Manolito's hair with gentle fingers and leaned forward to kiss him. The shadows in his eyes, the heaviness in his heart were almost more than she could bear.
"You think you will eventually lose him." She made it a statement.
Manolito lay back, locking his fingers behind his head, and stared up at the sparkling crystals covering the ceiling. He sighed. "Zacarias is a great man, meu amor, highly intelligent, and he wields much power. He has stood in front of my brothers, in front of me, shielding us from the kills to allow us more time. Each kill we make our souls grow darker."
"Can you, Riordan and Rafael try to…" She trailed off. What was she saying? Did she want Manolito to hunt the vampire?
He shook his head. "He would never allow us to do that for him. He believes he is responsible for us. I already see the darkness is strong in him. I was so close to turning myself, I should know. Even when I entered the other world, the other occupants knew. After a while the darkness runs together until you no longer know if you can resist the lure to just one time feel something. Anything."
"But three of you have found lifemates. That should give him hope."
"He cannot feel hope, not his own. He can only feel our hope for him. And even should he find his lifemate, I fear he would be too difficult for a woman of today's society to live with. Most of our lifemates are human or raised human. He is a throwback to a different era. You find me difficult. In comparison, I assure you, MaryAnn, I am a very modern man."
"I'm very glad to hear you say that, Manolito, because this modern woman has come to a decision, and it's my decision to make. Mine. You have to understand that I believe I do have rights. This is important to me."
"What decision would that be?" He sounded wary. He was wary. He wasn't about to free her from her obligations even if it was possible-which it wasn't.
"I want you to convert me. Now. Tonight. I want to share your life wholly with you." She ignored the storm clouds gathering in his eyes. "I didn't have a decision at any time along the way. So this is me, thinking it over, knowing what I'm doing and saying, yes, I love you and I want to be wholly yours."
Chapter Nineteen
M
ted
5"
Manolito bit down on his first response, forcing the sudden fear down. Emotions were much more difficult to deal with than he'd remembered. If he converted MaryAnn, and the wolf protested, it might kill her. No one, not even Vlad, remembered the pairing of a wolf and a Carpathian.