“You’re afraid of the pain,” Jacen accused.
“Pain isn’t always good, Jacen,” Mara said. “Sometimes it’s just distracting.”
“And I don’t need to he distracted right now.” Luke pointedly started to rise. “What I need is to prepare myself for combat … and so do you, Jacen.”
“It’s not only the file,” Jacen pressed. He was certain now that he should be the one to face Lomi Plo; that he was the only one who had no doubts about what they must do. “You’re not going to kill Raynar, either.”
“I haven’t decided anything yet,” Luke said.
“You may think you haven’t decided,” Jacen said. “But you’re not going to-and it’s a mistake.”
Luke cocked his brow. “I see.” He fell silent for a moment, then returned to his chair. “I don’t know what you’ve foreseen, Jacen, but I can promise you this-regardless of Raynar’s fate, the Colony will be destroyed. The war in your vision won’t come to pass.”
“I’m sorry, Uncle Luke, but promises aren’t good enough,” Jacen said. He would not trust Allana’s life to good intentions. “We must be sure the Colony dies-and that means we must act.”
Mara came and sat beside Luke in front of Jacen, then asked, “So you’re going to kill a man-someone who was once your friend-just to be certain?”
“I won’t enjoy it,” Jacen said. “But it’s necessary.”
“I know you think so, Jacen,” Luke said. “But I’m not convinced. Not yet.”
“We can’t afford to doubt ourselves,” Jacen insisted. “We must decide … and act.”
Luke sighed in exasperation. “Vergere again.” He shook his head. “Look, I know her instruction saved your life-“
“And helped us win the war with the Yuuzhan Vong,” Jacen pointed out.
“And helped win the war against the Yuuzhan Vong,” Luke admitted patiently. “But I’m not sure we should embrace her ideas as the core of our Jedi philosophy-in fact, I’m sure we shouldn’t.”
“Why not?” Jacen demanded.
“Because we’re no longer at war with the Yuuzhan Vong, for one thing,” Mara said. She shook her head, then pointed at R2-D2’s holoprojector. “Didn’t you learn anything from what you just saw?”
Jacen scowled, genuinely puzzled. “I don’t know what you mean.”
Luke’s voice grew sharp. “There’s more to being a Jedi than being effective, Jacen.” He looked away, then continued in a gentler tone. “Since the war ended, I’ve been growing more and more troubled by Vergere’s teachings, and I think I finally understand why.”
Jacen lifted his brow. “Why?”
“Because their ruthlessness reminds me so much of what my father believed.” Luke turned and looked into Jacen’s eyes. “Of what the Emperor taught him to believe.”
Jacen was astounded. “You can’t be serious!”
“I’m not saying Vergere’s teachings are immoral,” Luke replied. “In fact, they don’t concern themselves with morality at all. They provide no guidance.”
“Exactly!” Jacen said. “They’re about ridding ourselves of illusions, about seeing that nothing is ever truly dark or light, completely good or evil.”
“So a Jedi is free to take any action necessary to achieve his goal?” Luke asked. “His only duty is to be effective?”
“His first duty is to choose,” Jacen said. “Everything follows from that.”
Mara and Luke looked at each other, and something passed between them that Jacen barely perceived.
Finally, Luke said, “But Jacen, that isn’t what a Jedi is.”
Jacen frowned. He could not understand what his uncle was trying to tell him, except that it had to do with principles and responsibilities-with those ancient shackles that Vergere had taught him to open. Could Luke really be saying that the Jedi should don them again; that they should let the opinions of others dictate their actions?
“Very well,” Jacen said cautiously. “What is a Jedi?”
Luke smiled. “I suggest you spend some time meditating on that,” he said. “In the meantime, just remember that we aren’t bounty hunters, okay?”
Jacen nodded. “Yes, Master.” He understood that he was being told in no uncertain terms not to assassinate Raynar-at least not without Luke’s permission. “I understand, but I sense that you still have doubts about the morality of your plan. Perhaps I should be the one to confront Lomi Plo.”