[Dark Nest] - 3(58)

As a result, Jacen could not overhear what Luke and Mara were saying to Saba and to his parents at the Falcon’s boarding ramp. But he doubted it was a problem. They were all holding hands and embracing, and he could feel their concern and warm feelings in the Force.

Probably, Luke had just called Jacen over to say goodbye before his parents departed on their mission against the Chiss. Jacen would have liked to save them the trip-to make them see that the Chiss would keep attacking the Killiks whether Luke’s crazy scheme worked or not. But he did not dare.

Lowbacca and Tesar’s accusations had left him in a tenuous position with Luke and Mara, and Jacen could not risk aggravating the situation by openly opposing Luke’s plan. Everything depended on the Chiss winning this war, and he had to remain in a position to make certain they did.

Jacen reached the foot of the Falcon’s boarding ramp and stopped, waiting his turn to embrace his parents and wish them a good journey. Despite his father’s graying hair and the crow’s-feet creeping out from the corners of his mother’s eyes, he did not think of them as old. They were just experienced-vastly experienced.

They had been going on missions like this together for over thirty years-since long before he and Jaina had been born-and Jacen was just beginning to truly understand the sacrifices they had made, the risks they had taken. How often had they faced dilemmas like the one he faced now, had to choose between a terrible evil and an absolute one? How many secrets like Allana had they kept hidden-how many were they still hiding?

The time had come for Jacen and his peers to take up the beacon his parents and their friends had been carrying all these years-not to push aside the previous generation, but to carry the burden themselves and allow the old heroes a well-deserved rest. He knew he and his fellows were ready; a group of Jedi had not been as carefully selected and prepared since the days of the Old Republic. But when Jacen looked at his parents and recalled how they had changed the galaxy, he found himself wondering whether he and his generation were worthy.

Sometimes, given their secure childhoods and formal training, he even wondered whether the new Jedi were too soft. Compared with the filthy, overcrowded freighter that his father had called home as a boy, or the dusty Tatooine moisture farm that had shaped his uncle Luke’s early life, the Jedi academy on Yavin 4 had been luxurious. Even his mother, raised in the Royal Palace of Alderaan, had understood true danger as a child, with the deadly gaze of Palpatine always turned her family’s way.

“Jacen?”

Jacen felt his father’s eyes on him and realized everyone was looking in his direction.

“You here?” Han asked. “You’re not having another of your visions, are you?”

“No, just …” He was surprised to find a lump in his throat. “…just thinking.”

“Well, stop it,” Han ordered. “You’re scaring me.”

Jacen forced a smile. “Sorry. I wouldn’t want that.” He turned to his mother. “You can’t talk him out of this?”

Leia must have sensed something despite his defenses, because she ignored the joke and said, “Is there a reason I should?”

Jacen rolled his eyes, but silently cursed his mother’s perceptiveness. “It was a joke, Mom.” He spread his arms and wrapped her in a tight hug so she would not be able to examine his face too closely. “I just came to wish you a safe trip.”

He released her and turned to embrace his father. “Good …” Had Jacen realized he was going to have such a hard time concealing his emotions, he would have found an excuse to be busy doing something else when his parents departed. “… bye, Dad.”

“Take it easy, kid. We’re coming back.” Han suddenly stiffened, then pulled back and eyed Jacen nervously. “Aren’t we? You haven’t seen something-“

“You’re coming back, Dad-I’m certain of it,” Jacen said. “Just be careful, okay? Raynar isn’t going to believe you-and it won’t help that you’re telling the truth.”

“Is that what you’re worried about?” Han sounded relieved. “Look, kid, we’ve been over this about a-“

“We’ll be fine, Jacen,” Leia interrupted, finally warming to him and squeezing his hand. “This is the only way to make the Chiss understand how difficult it would be to win a war against the Killiks.”

Saba stepped up behind Leia, looming over her the way Chewbacca used to loom over Han. “Everything will be fine, Jacen. Your mother is a powerful Jedi-az strong in her way as you are in yourz.”

Jacen nodded. “I know that.” He leaned down and kissed Leia on the cheek. “May the Force be with you, Mom.”