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[Dark Nest] - 3(38)

By:The Swarm War


Jacen did not seem as surprised as he should have. “Not at all,” he said. “I did that to protect him.”

“From what?” Mara demanded.

“We were sleeping near an Ewok village when a Gorax attacked,” he explained. “Before we could get there, it had wiped out half the village and was heading home.”

Luke felt Mara’s ire fading. Gorax were primate behemoths, standing as tall as the trees on the forest moon, and they were well known for their brutal natures. “I see. You were afraid the memory would traumatize him.”

“No, actually not,” Jacen said. “Ben knows better than most kids his age that the galaxy is filled with monsters, so I’m sure he could have handled what he saw with a little adult guidance.”

“You’re more confident of that than I am,” Luke said. “Did he feel their deaths in the Force?”

Jacen nodded. “And he sensed what the Gorax’s captives were feeling, too.”

Mara’s hand went to her mouth.

Luke asked, “So that’s why you blocked-“

“No,” Jacen said. “I blocked Ben’s memory to keep him from recalling what I did.”

“What you did?” Luke asked.

“Ben started to scream that I had to save the Ewoks, and that drew the Gorax’s attention,” Jacen explained. “But I couldn’t take him into the fight with me, and I could sense another Gorax in the forest behind me-“

“So you couldn’t leave him alone,” Mara finished.

Jacen nodded. “I used the Force to hide us.”

When Jacen remained silent, Luke prompted, “And?”

“And Ben was very sensitive that night,” Jacen continued. “He felt what happened to the prisoners in the cave.”

“That’s what you didn’t want him to remember,” Mara said.

“By morning, he was already beginning to withdraw from the Force again,” Jacen said. “He’s still young; I think he blames it for the bad things he feels in it.”

“I think he does,” Luke said. He and Mara had postulated a similar theory themselves, shortly after the war, when it began to grow clear that Ben was withdrawing from the Force. “And how, exactly, did you block this memory?”

“It’s a form of Force illusion,” .Jacen explained. “The Adepts call it a memory rub.”

Luke frowned. “That sounds pretty invasive for the Fallanassi,” he said. “And I don’t recall any White Current techniques that can permanently affect another person’s mind.”

Jacen smiled and spread his hands in a gesture of helplessness. “Well, Akanah did say I was only the second-worst student she ever had.”

“It’s good to know I’m still number one with her,” Luke said, not laughing at the joke. He paused a moment, then continued, “I see why you blocked the memory. I’ll probably even be grateful, when I’ve had time to think about it.”

“I’m grateful now,” Mara said. Luke could feel that she had already forgiven Jacen completely. “I hope you can teach me that technique.”

“I’m not nearly the guide Akanah,” Jacen replied. “But I can certainly try.”

“First, I want to know why you didn’t just tell Mara and me what happened,” Luke said. “I understand you wanted to protect Ben, but that doesn’t make sense.”

“That’s right, Jacen,” Mara said, forcing herself to be stern again. “There’s no excuse for keeping secrets from us.”

“I’m sorry,” Jacen said, shame crawling up his face. “I should have told you, but it was reckless of me to put him in that position.”

“And so you decided to hide what happened from us?” Luke demanded.

“I don’t know why, but I sense that he needs me to guide him into the Force,” Jacen said. “And I thought if you knew what had happened, you wouldn’t trust me with him.”

“Jacen!” Mara’s voice was incredulous, but her relief flooded the Force. “How could you think that?”

Jacen looked a little confused. “I’m not sure. I just thought-“

“You thought wrong!” Mara said. “You’ve been wonderful for Ben, and there’s no one else I’d rather trust with him. But no more secrets.” She glanced over at Luke. “Okay?”

“We’ll see.” He was a little less inclined than his wife to forgive all. There was no doubt about the effect Jacen had on Ben, but Luke remained uneasy about the way his nephew continued to shut his emotions off from the Force. “You’re still hiding something from us. And I want to know what it is.”