“Do you want to talk about it?” Charlotte asked. “I’m not Blaze, but I care about you. I have Vadim’s voice in my head. I can’t know what it’s like to be assaulted by him, not physically, but I do know how horrible it feels to carry a piece of him inside me and know he can use that to hurt others.”
Emeline shook her head slowly. “Talking about him makes me sick. I can’t think about him or I want to slit my own throat.” She touched her throat with trembling fingers, right over the jagged scar where Vadim had torn her open to get at her blood.
Charlotte’s heart jerked hard. Emeline wasn’t kidding. Clearly she’d thought about doing that very thing often. There was resolve in her voice. Steel, even.
“Honey. No.” Charlotte kept her tone low. Firm. “That isn’t an answer, and you know that. If you did that, you’d leave the rest of us. You’d leave Liv. She needs you more than she does any of us. We’re trying with her, but she doesn’t feel the connection with anyone but you.”
Emeline ducked her head and didn’t respond.
Charlotte felt as if she was floundering. She pressed her fingers to her temple realizing she had a headache. Instantly Tariq was there, soothing her, taking away the small pain. Reassuring her. Giving her something she knew Emeline and the children needed as well.
“Honey, you know what has to be done. I know you’re afraid of them, but you have to allow one of the Carpathians to heal you enough to stop Vadim from getting to you. You have to sleep. You have to be able to eat. You can’t let him win.”
“What if he attacks Liv and I have no way to communicate with him?” Emeline protested. She shook her head. “I can’t take that chance. If Tariq converts Liv and stops Vadim’s ability to get to her, then and only then will I consider it.”
“Has Blaze explained the process to you? Tariq tells me he’s trying to talk to Carpathian healers about how best to bring the children into their world.”
Emeline closed her eyes tightly and then nodded. When her lashes lifted she stared out into the darkness, pain etched into her face. “She said the pain was excruciating. I don’t want that for Liv, for you, for anyone, but she’s not going to make it if she continues the way she is. They took so much from her, Charlie, so much. She can’t wait. You have to tell Tariq that. Convince him. We’re going to lose her if he waits much longer, and it won’t be to Vadim.”
“What about you, Emme? Are we going to lose you?” Charlotte asked quietly.
Emeline continued to stare out into the darkness. “I’m trying, Charlie. I know they don’t think I am, but I have to work this all out in my head. I’ve never been a warrior woman like Blaze or you. I don’t know how to fight him. I have to figure that out and come to terms with what he did to me. Once I can do that, I hope I can live with it.”
Charlotte let silence stretch between them, hoping Emeline would continue, but she didn’t. Finally, Charlotte tried prompting her. “What did he do? You need to talk about it, Emeline. If not with me, then at least with Blaze. If not with Blaze, Tariq can call in a counselor. Carpathians must have someone like our counselors.”Emeline shook her head. “I could never talk to strangers. Not about him. I can barely talk to Blaze.” She sent Charlotte a faint smile, the first, but it didn’t reach her eyes. “I don’t know why you’re the lucky one who gets to hear all this.”
“Maybe because you trust me, and you know Vadim can talk to me as well. I touched a carousel horse that he put a curse of some kind on and I got a splinter from it. We can’t get it out and it’s horrifying to know that I’ve got some part of him inside me.”
Emeline moistened her dry, swollen lips. “He forced his blood on me. It burned. It burned all the way down my throat and into my body. My heart and lungs. Every organ in my body. It still burns. Then he forced me to drink blood from a cup.” Her voice cracked and she shook her head. Tears shimmered and several caught on her long lashes. “Drinking that blood was different, not like drinking acid, but it was still so horrible, like being caught in the worst nightmare possible.”
She stroked her palm down her throat and then pressed her hand tight against her stomach as if the pain was there all over again.
Charlotte hurt for her. Again, it was all she could do not to put her arms around Emeline and hold her, but Emeline had shrunk into herself, made herself much smaller and pulled the robe tighter around her, as if that thin material could protect her somehow.
I hate this, Tariq. I hate that vampire. He’s destroyed her life. Destroyed her. She’s so far gone I can’t reach her.
Sielamet, you’ve come closer than anyone else to getting her to talk. You’re doing fine. You have that ability whether or not you realize it to make people comfortable and able to tell you things they wouldn’t reveal to someone else.
She let him wrap her up in his warmth, wishing she could do that for Emeline. She tried, sending as much warmth and comfort as she could to the woman.
“What else did he do, Emme?” Charlotte probed gently.
Emeline shook her head, and tears spilled over, tracking down her face. “I can’t think about anything else yet. I can’t let it be real. I just have to take one thing at a time. One thing. Anything else will break me, Charlie. He is a monster. He touched me. He took my blood and made me take his. He whispers to me, threatens me. Threatens children. I have to hold very still and not think too much in order to survive. That’s what I’m doing. That’s what you need to tell them. I’m surviving right now, and until I can process what happened to me, I can’t talk about it.”
“Okay, honey, I understand, but you will have to allow one of the men to help you sleep without hearing Vadim. If you don’t, it will just drive you crazy. Are you afraid of them? Has Vadim made you afraid of the Carpathians?” She asked gently, feeling as if she were in a minefield.
“They make me nervous,” Emeline admitted. “Blaze is lifemate to Maksim and I know I’m hurting her by not accepting him. I will. I really will. Just not yet.” There was a plea for understanding in her voice. So soft. Almost faint. Her gaze never stopped seeking the night, looking for danger, looking for a threat. “Maybe when Val wakes. He knows what Vadim did to Liv, and he helped her. Maybe I can accept his aid. I don’t know.”
Charlotte had no idea how long it would take for the Carpathian to heal but if his wounds had been that bad, it could take a while. She wasn’t certain Emeline had that kind of time. More, she was certain Emeline knew that and counted on it.
“Tariq has the most beautiful carousels on his property. Have you seen them?” Deliberately, Charlotte changed the subject, wanting to indicate to Emeline that she could relax. There would be no more talk of Vadim.
Sielamet. It was a slight reprimand.
She’s done. I have to let it go. She’s talked as much as she can right now. She needs normal. Just like I need normal.
Emeline turned to look at her. “I remember in Paris you talking about carousels and how much you loved them.”
“I was learning restoration from a master. He was the best in the world. Tariq had contacted him asking him to come to the States to work on his carousels. He has a couple in his home that need work.”
“Couldn’t he just wave his hand or something?” Emeline asked.
I was so eager to restore them that I didn’t think of that. Why can’t you just wave your hand? You were the one to carve them.
Tariq was there in her mind. She felt him warm and gentle, caring for her, stroking her mind intimately as she tried to keep Emeline engaged in idle conversation, trying to give her normal, even if just for a few moments.
Something is lost in the restoration. I tried it with a couple of pieces and it isn’t the same. I could carve them again, but then they would be made in this century and not my first works. In any case, I like working with my hands. I am looking forward to learning the restoration process.
The carousels meant something special to him. She could hear it in his voice. He didn’t want to destroy the oldest carousel any more than she did, maybe less so, but he would because it was dangerous to anyone who touched it. She needed to find out why. She needed to track Vadim back to wherever he was and she needed to make certain her growing family was safe.
She was claiming the children, Genevieve and now Emeline. Even the hunters protecting them—especially Lojos, Tomas and Mataias, who had been thoughtful enough to provide the stone dragons for the children and Val, a hunter she’d never met, but one who had taken the time to save Liv and give her strength in the midst of evil.
“Apparently waving one’s hand doesn’t restore art in the same way as the methods we use. Who knew there was something a Carpathian didn’t do perfectly?”
That got the smallest of smiles out of Emeline. “I’d make you tea, but I’m not very steady on my feet.”
I’ll have Blaze bring tea and something easy for Emeline to get down.
Charlotte pressed a hand to her stomach. Tariq was going to have to aid her in getting down the tea. Genevieve came up the porch stairs, looking spectacular, as she always did, a bright smile on her face as she greeted Emeline warmly.Genevieve sank down into the rocker on the other side of Emeline and instantly brought up Paris and the good times they’d had there. She avoided talking all things Carpathian and vampire. She was skillful that way because she was genuine in everything she did.