Dark Carousel (Dark #30)(51)

Charlotte’s heart jerked hard. “Can you hear him now?”Emeline shook her head. “Only if I fall asleep.”
That explained the dark circles under her eyes. “Did you tell Blaze or Tariq? They’ve woven safeguards to protect you. If the protections aren’t working, they need to know to build stronger ones.”
Emeline tightened the robe around her thin body with nervous fingers. “I don’t want to be near any of them. In order for them to weave stronger safeguards, I have to let them in. Especially if he’s in my mind—and he is. I just can’t let another one in there as well. Not yet. I’d rather just not go to sleep at night.”
Charlotte took a deep breath, praying for wisdom. She wasn’t equipped to handle such severe trauma. She had a very bad feeling about Emeline. “You know that isn’t good for you, Emme. You’re going to have to let them help you. Have you spoken to Blaze about hearing him in your sleep?”
Emeline shook her head. “I know I’m going to have to let them near me—the Carpathians. They’re so powerful. And I can feel them, their predatory natures. They scare me almost as much as vampires terrify me.” She took a deep, shuddering breath. “I can feel their natures. They’re almost like the vampires. They aren’t the same, but so dangerous, Charlie. So dangerous.”
“But not to you. Not to the children. You should see the stone dragons the triplets made for the children. They would give their lives for you.” She went silent for a moment, knowing she wasn’t getting anywhere. Emeline just rocked herself back and forth, clutching at the opening of her robe with nervous fingers.
“Honey,” she said softly in her most persuasive voice, “you know you have to let them help you. You can’t go on this way.”
“I know. I just need . . . time.” Emeline’s gaze jumped to the skyline again.
“At least tell me what he says to you.” She kept her tone gentle.
Emeline’s hands crept up, holding the robe around her tightly against her neck as if to keep those jagged, serrated teeth from tearing at her flesh. Her gaze frantically sought out the sky, as if she was certain Vadim would swoop down and take her away. “He tells me I have to come to him.”
The admission was so low that at first Charlotte didn’t think she’d spoken, but then the words penetrated and she touched Tariq, needing him to hear.
“He keeps ordering me. Threatening me.”
“With what?”
“Liv.” Emeline swallowed with difficulty and then went into a spasm of coughing. She gasped for breath and shook her head several times, rocking her body back and forth. “He says, he’ll kill Liv if I don’t go to him.” 
She looked haunted. Terrified. Charlotte couldn’t help feeling a little terrified for her, nor could she stop herself from searching the skies just as Emeline had done, or reaching for Tariq, settling into the warmth and comfort of his mind.
Both of you are safe. Vadim cannot penetrate the safeguards.
How is he getting through to her when she sleeps? She tried not to let it sound like an accusation, but it was. There was no normal, not even when she tried. There never would be in his world. It wasn’t his fault, but suddenly she wanted to throw a little screaming fit where no one could hear her—except, Tariq would always hear her.
Her fingers curled around the arms of the rocker until they turned white. She hated what Vadim had done to Emeline, and she didn’t really know the extent of what that was. She hated what he’d done to Liv, and what he was still doing to both of them. It made her feel helpless and out of control, two states she’d never been fond of.
“This sucks, Emme,” she said aloud. What else could she say? Because it did. “What do you tell him?”
“That if he harms Liv, or forces her to harm herself, then I’ll kill myself.” Emeline turned haunted eyes on Charlotte. “I would, too. And he knows it. So far it’s worked, but I can tell he’s getting impatient with me. I’m worried about Liv. I want Tariq to convert her. Tell him he has to do it immediately.”
The entire time, Emeline whispered, but every word pierced Charlotte’s heart. She wanted to hold Emeline tight and keep her safe. She wanted to hunt down Vadim and make him suffer a long time before he died. Or maybe just kill him quickly before he fried her.
“I will, Emme, I promise. I’m going to tell him everything. You know that. You have Blaze. You know what a lifemate is.” She frowned, suddenly afraid. Can vampires have lifemates? Could Emeline be Vadim’s lifemate?
There was a small silence. She knew Tariq was listening to every word Emeline said and he was nearly as upset as she was, but in a different, more predatory, scary way. She knew he would insist on Emeline allowing the male Carpathians to aid her sleep and Emeline was going to resist.
To become a vampire, a Carpathian hunter must choose to give up his soul. In that moment, he is lost, never to be recovered. If by chance he runs across his other half, he will know and feel regret for a moment, but it is fleeting, and she will be in terrible danger. He cannot kill her himself, but he would not want that reminder alive. Emeline is not Vadim’s lifemate. She would know and she would be suffering differently. Vadim took her blood and forced her to take his, just as he did with Liv. More, I think he did at least two blood exchanges with Emeline. If that is so, I don’t know how she lives with the acid burning her. She refuses to allow a male to aid her.
She needs help. She’s ill.
A master vampire exchanged blood with her, Charlotte.
Tariq sounded patient, as if he were explaining things to a child. That definitely gave Charlotte a target for the pent-up anger she had nowhere to put. I know that, she hissed back, letting him see the edge of her temper.
Sielamet, beloved. Keeper of my soul. His voice went soft and intimate, caressing her from the inside out. I know this is difficult. To see Emeline that way and not be able to aid her is devastating, but she refuses our aid. Should we force her? Should we be as Vadim is? Taking her will? Even though it is for her own good? We are coming close to having no choice in the matter, but it was agreed we would give her time to make the choice herself. Blaze has tried with her. Amelia has. We are all counting on you. To place such a burden on your shoulders is wrong, I know it is, but we are trying to save her sanity as well as her life.She heard the guilt and regret in his voice. He detested her being there more than she did, but it was coming to the point where they would force Emeline to accept their aid, and all of them were afraid if they did so, they would lose her. Charlotte feared they were right.
Keep her talking. She’s telling you more than she has anyone. Maksim is sending Blaze to you and after she gets there, I’ll give it a few minutes and then send Genevieve. Hopefully the conversation will end on a good note, not a bad one. She’ll feel surrounded by women she can trust.
She knew he was doing his best, feeling his way just as she was. “Emeline, has Liv said she can hear voices whispering?”
Charlotte knew what that felt like. Vadim’s voice talking to her, commanding her to get out of the tunnels. She’d felt violated that he was in her mind and terrified that he might be able to use her as a spy. That splinter was still in her. As long as she was on Tariq’s property she thought she was safe, but maybe she wasn’t. She knew that voice. That horrible, sweet temptation. She studied Emeline carefully. It wasn’t just the voice. She was in pain. Physical pain.
Emeline shook her head slowly. “If so, she hasn’t told me. I know she doesn’t sleep unless Tariq aids her.” She sighed. “Maksim and Tariq have done so much for the children and me. The burden on them is almost unbearable. I can’t think what it must be like for them to try to know the right thing to do. Liv can’t stay in this world as she is. She’s connected to Val and feels his every suffering even though he cannot and he’s in the ground. I can’t imagine what it will be like when he surfaces. All the children suffer, but then what do they do to alleviate that? Should they bring them into their world?” There was an edge to Emeline’s voice, as if the last thing she wanted was to be in the world of Carpathians.
Charlotte took a deep breath and let it out. She wasn’t entirely certain what would happen when Tariq finished the transition on her. She only knew that her senses were extremely acute and she was stronger than she’d ever been. She had no idea what it truly entailed to be Carpathian. It was possible Emeline knew far more than she did. She purposely hadn’t asked Tariq for too many details, wanting to take her time to process before she made that final commitment. She had to go carefully.
“Aren’t they already in that world, Emeline?” Charlotte asked gently.
Emeline pressed both hands to her stomach as a shudder of pain crossed her face. Her body shrank into itself, making her look smaller—thinner—than ever. “Yes,” she whispered. “I guess we all are.” 
Charlotte could see her easily in the dark, although she was certain Emeline thought herself hidden. Every breath she drew was shallow. A shudder or wheeze. Lines were etched deep around her mouth. She linked her fingers, still pressing into her stomach as though it hurt, or was cramping. She twisted her fingers together until they turned white, but she kept her face as still as possible, as if they were just talking about the weather.