Dark Carousel (Dark #30)(47)

Amelia looked over at Lourdes, compassion on her face. “I don’t know what to do to help them.” There was despair in her voice and etched onto her face when she turned back to Charlotte. Tears glittered in her eyes. “I can’t help them any more than I can help myself.”
Charlotte had been edging closer to her, and Amelia turned into her so Charlotte pulled her tightly against her and held her. Amelia burst into quiet sobs.
“I don’t know how to help them, either, Amelia, but I think we’re stronger together than apart. I think if you and I work together, we can eventually help each other and then the children.”There was no way she could stand there in the night, holding the weeping teenager, and not want to be a mother to her. Someone needed to help them all. She didn’t think she was qualified to be a mom, but she was all they had and she was determined to be whatever they needed. “We can do this together, Amelia. Whatever Tariq decides about all of us, we can do it together. You know he won’t let us down. He’ll find a way for all of you to be safe outside the property, and in the meantime, we can find a way to help our little ones.”
Amelia lifted her head. “Do you think so?”
Charlotte nodded solemnly because she meant every word and she wanted Amelia to see the truth. “When Tariq adopts all of you, I will as well. That would make me the mom and him the dad. He wants to make certain no one can step in and take any of you from us.”
“Liv said you weren’t sure about being our mother. She can read people,” Amelia said carefully, clearly trying to find the right words without upsetting Charlotte.
Charlotte nodded and stroked little soothing caresses down Amelia’s hair. “She’s right. At the time I was just getting used to the idea of being with Tariq. I’d just taken on Lourdes, and wasn’t doing such a great job with one traumatized child who barely knew me, and then he said he wanted to adopt all four of you. I didn’t know if I could help you and that worried me. I didn’t want to make an emotional snap decision. I want you to be healthy and happy. But after really thinking about it, I’m in the same world you’re in. I’ve seen the monsters and what they do. I’m not a qualified counselor, but I don’t need to be to be your mother. I just need to love you and find a common path so we can all connect. I’m willing to do that. I want to do that.”
Amelia sighed and leaned in closer, wrapping her arms around Charlotte, holding on tightly—so tightly Charlotte felt the bite of that bruising grip almost to her bones.
“He touched me.” Amelia whispered the horrific words, pressing her forehead against Charlotte’s neck. “Inside. You know. Down there. Outside. On my skin. He put his hand on my belly and then he stripped my clothes off without touching them. One minute I had clothes and then I was naked in front of him, the one they called Vadim. He was obviously the leader. His brother Sergey was there and the one called Fridrick.”
Amelia whispered the words into Charlotte’s ear, clinging tightly. “It wasn’t like what they did to Liv, because they only bit into my neck and my . . .” She pulled back and touched her left breast. The tears on her lashes made them spiky and wet. Heartbreaking. “Here.” She laid her palm over her breast, shuddering. “And then he took his hand and pressed very hard into my belly and put his fingers in me. He said I wasn’t ripe yet, but would be soon.” She closed her eyes and laid her head on Charlotte’s shoulder. “They were horrible. Grinning. They said someone named Addler could have me.” 
A little shudder went through Amelia’s slim body and then she was crying again. Silently. Heart-wrenching sobs that broke Charlotte’s heart. She held the girl as close as possible, whispering to her, reaching for Tariq in her mind. She wanted to be able to soothe Amelia by herself, and she knew Tariq was with Danny trying to help him understand what they all knew had to be done with the children. Conversion. Charlotte didn’t want to think too much about that last step. Danny had waylaid him before he could reach the gate and insisted on talking.
Addler is Fridrick’s brother. There are three of them. Fridrick is the oldest, then Georg and last Addler. He got kicked around a lot. They often travel together. All three chose to give up their souls and follow Vadim Malinov. They were there that night, tearing through the village, killing as many innocents as possible just because I’d befriended them and refused to join the Malinovs in their betrayal.
She heard the guilt in his voice. She couldn’t imagine what it was like watching so many innocent people fall at the hands of monstrous vampires simply because you chose that village to live and work in.
“Is something wrong with Amelia?” Liv came up behind them, her voice trembling when she saw her older sister in Charlotte’s arms.
Amelia started to pull away, hastily trying to cover up the fact that she was crying, but Charlotte didn’t let her. “She’s telling me about what happened to her in the tunnels. It’s hard to do that, to let yourself remember and trust someone else enough to tell them, but it’s also very brave. She’ll be all right. We all will. We’ll get through this together.”
While she was talking, Liv put her hand on Charlotte’s leg. Casually. Lightly. Still, Charlotte knew she was checking for the truth. Reading her. She continued to hold Amelia and stroked soothing caresses down her hair, down her back, whispering gently to her how proud she was and that they could get through this. They could help the others together. And she meant every single word.
Liv looked up at her for the first time with a fierce, possessive look, and she wrapped her arms around Charlotte’s waist, holding on to her sister and locking her against Charlotte. “You’ll do it then. You’ll be our mother.”
“I want to be,” Charlotte agreed softly. “I think we all belong together, don’t you?”
Liv nodded. “And Emeline. She belongs with us. She’s broken, too.”
Charlotte dropped her hand on top of Liv’s head. “We might all be a bit broken, honey, but together we’re very strong and we’ll grow stronger as we get to know one another. We can help one another get through this. And we will get through it.”
“You believe that,” Liv said. “Amelia, she really believes that.”
Amelia managed to stop the tears, and she just rested her forehead against Charlotte’s shoulder for a moment before straightening and directing a smile at her younger sister. “I know she does. And I’m beginning to believe it myself.”
“What are these?” Liv asked, turning back toward the rock dragons. “They look like fun. They’re all very different, aren’t they? Where did they come from?” She fired off the questions rapidly.Charlotte laughed softly, still holding Amelia. They weren’t through talking but they had a good start. “Which one appeals to you?” She wondered if each individual dragon made by the three Carpathian hunters had been created with one of these children in mind. That would be . . . incredible. That would mean that in the middle of putting together a plan to leave a dangerous situation, knowing they were going into battle, they’d thought about the children and found a way to make each dragon significant and appealing to them. She loved that a Carpathian male would do such a thing.
Liv let go of Charlotte and Amelia and walked slowly around the other dragons. She put her hand on each of them. Lourdes’s blue dragon. Bella’s red dragon. Amelia’s orange dragon. Her hand stroked down the brown one and then settled on the green one. At once her mouth broke out into a smile and she pushed her face close to the rock, whispering. Charlotte let out her breath slowly. That was exactly what Lojos, Tomas and Mataias had done—created a rock dragon for each child. The children couldn’t leave the property, and they were all, in their own ways, suffering from their parents’ death and the events that followed, but this had been done for them. Something unusual and beautiful. She wanted to kiss each of the triplets.
There will be no kissing other men. Amusement tinged Tariq’s voice.
Did you know they did this for the children? You should see their faces, Tariq; these dragons are incredible.
You don’t know the half of it. We’ll have to watch Bella and Lourdes to make certain they don’t fly off. But they have protection as well as something fun and unique to play with.
She turned Amelia so she could see her sisters and Lourdes playing on the rock dragons, whispering to them and then laughing. “Look at their faces, honey,” she whispered softly, in awe. She might not know how to help the children, but she wasn’t alone in trying. All the Carpathians were willing to work toward healing them.
All children are sacred to Carpathians, Charlotte. Each child belongs to all of us. We help raise them and care for them. They are loved by all.
I thought hunters couldn’t feel emotion.
She felt his hesitation as he tried to explain, but even by touching his memories, she would never fully understand. With children there is a softness brought only by them. Not an emotion, but a stirring, an echo maybe of what we had before we lost the ability to feel.
She felt his sadness, his sorrow, for the hunters protecting them, the ones unable to see in color or feel the things they should even while they thought of helping children who desperately needed it. “See, Amelia, look at Liv’s face,” she reiterated. “She’ll get through this. We all will, together. Help me help them all. Stand with Tariq and me. We can be a family. It won’t be the one you had, or the one I had, but we’ll be good together. All of us. Even the hunters protecting us. We’ll count them as family, too.”