"Yeah?"
"There's a point to the question, right?"
He smiled. Distracting her was the best form of medicine, and when she calmed down, she'd be able to sleep. That's where real healing began. "Of course. Do you remember the main theme of the movie?"
This time she snorted against his chest. "Golf?"
"No. Finding your happy place."
"You cannot be serious right now. If the whole point of this conversation is about midgets on bikes, I may need to kick you out."
He laughed. "Close. His was midgets on bikes, sure, but who are we to judge? As cliché as it sounds, finding a scene in your head to concentrate on when you're panicking is a good way to calm down. Between controlling your breath, and focusing on your happy place, the bad things go away faster."
"What's yours?"
He rarely shared personal information with the survivors he helped. Being with women in such intimate settings was a fine line to walk, and he was already emotionally involved with Selina. But tonight, for a little while, he needed the connection just as badly as she did.
"I was ten years old, and it was the last day of school. Instead of taking the bus home, my parents picked me up and took me out. They'd planned the entire day around things I loved, saying I worked hard and got good grades. You know, I hear about these big vacations like Disney World kids go on, but nothing was better than that day. We went to the park and ate hot dogs. Rented these paddleboats and sailed them on the water. We stopped at the Central Park Zoo, and ate ice cream, and then they we drove upstate and I went to my first drive-in movie."
"What movie?"
"Batman Forever. So cool. When we got home, I was exhausted, but I'd never been so happy in my life. Everything was just...perfect."
He let her process her thoughts, her silky hair wrapping around his fingers in a caress. "I like that day," she said.
"What about you? Something you remember from your parents?" She stiffened beneath him. What had he said wrong? Did she have issues with her family and he'd brought up something painful? "You don't have to share with me, Selina. It can be a private memory; I had no right to ask."
Sometimes, in sifting for a happy memory, people shut down. The past was a closet full of secrets, and many he'd found were not pleasant. He craved to know everything about Selina, but he needed to keep the distance between them or he could make a terrible mistake. The most important goal was to heal her.
"I didn't have any real parents," she said softly. Her face pressed against the cotton of his shirt. "I was in foster care my whole life."
Shock filled him. She was so capable and confident; he would've never guessed she didn't have a solid family supporting her in the background. He remained silent, waiting for more. Finally, she spoke.
"My parents died when I was little. Car crash. I lived, but they didn't. I don't remember much about them, but I was in the hospital for a while, and then I went into the foster care system. I didn't speak for a long time, so I saw a lot of therapists, and I guess I was too damaged to have anyone want me full time."
His gut clenched. He never knew she'd experienced such pain, had always assumed her past was blessed, the complete opposite of his. Shame filled him. Dante never realized he could be judgmental until now. He pressed his lips against her hair.
"No one ever hurt or abused me. I bounced around a lot for a bit, until I began speaking again. I finally settled with an older couple, who had a bunch of kids there, and stayed. They cared for my needs but they were...cold. I think they took in children for money. Anyway, school was my outlet for everything. I decided early on that could be my ticket to freedom. And it was. I got a scholarship, finished my master's, and began working in real estate."
"You must've had the heart and soul of a lion," he said. "Not many kids are able to transition out of that type of life."
"Again, I had shelter, food, and opportunities. Some of my foster-siblings were pretty cool too, so that helped. But acing tests and closing big deals don't seem to rate as a great Happy Gilmore moment."
He hated himself. Why did he have to bring up that stupid exercise? He figured she'd tell him a great family story, but instead, he'd managed to make things worse. "I think you're extraordinary, Selina Rogers," he said. "I'd say your entire life is a happy memory, because you took what you had and made it beautiful."
She sucked in her breath. The connection surged between them. Dante closed his eyes, fighting his desire to turn her head up and kiss her, plunder those sweet lips, gather her taste, and make sure she never was lonely or sad again. But she didn't move, and neither did he.
"Dante?"
"Yes?"
"Would it be okay to use this moment as my happy place?"
His arms tightened around her. Damned if moisture didn't gather in his eyes. "I think it would be better than okay."
Moments later, she fell asleep in his arms.
And Dante wondered if he'd ever be the same man again.
Chapter Six
"SO, what's up with you and the mail guy?"
Selina turned to Gary, who wiggled his brow in a bad imitation of Groucho Marx. The team gathered for their weekly meeting around the gleaming conference table for a mass assault of power point presentations. She glanced around to make sure no one heard him, but everyone was involved in their own conversations. "His name is Daniel." She kept her tone cool and even. "He's been delivering my mail for two years. We've become friends."
"Friends, huh? I'm assuming you don't know about the rumors."
Selina held back a sigh. The water cooler at Inferno was worse than most, and the long line of make ups and break ups in the company made for all day gossip. "Rumors about Dan?"
Gary shrugged. "He stops in for a so-called cup of coffee on a regular basis. He checks with Andrea on your schedule a lot. And I guess no one else at Inferno has long, heart to heart chats with the mailman. Everyone thinks you're doing him."
She tried not to flinch. Usually she'd laugh it off, but lately things were different. Images of the attack, of her closeness with Dan, and her growing attraction to her midnight visitor tumbled her brain into a tailspin. She ducked her head, and forced a half laugh, pretending to concentrate on the stack of papers in front of her. "Classy, Gary, as always."
"Since you're rarely in the spotlight, this is huge news. Doing the mail guy is epic around here."
Annoyance surged. Picking apart and discussing her love life was off limits right now. Just the thought made her sick. She looked up. "Who the hell cares if I'm doing him?" Selina lifted her fingers and made matching quotation marks. "Give me a list of names and I'll personally assure all of them to the contrary."
Gary shifted in the leather seat, suddenly uncomfortable. "Hell, Selina, I don't care who you have fun with. But it's like the proverbial secretary cliché - you doing the mail guy. You're up for that promotion and I don't want crappy rumors to keep you from what you've been working for. Close the deal with Forrester and you got it. But don't let a distraction throw you off your game. Know what I mean?"
Yes. She did. Gary was a straight shooter. If he said there was gossip, it must be worse than she thought. She sat back in her chair as the lights went out, and the projector switched on. Her boss droned on about property and statistics, and the dark lulled her into a trance.
Selina knew she'd been distracted, but it was more than Daniel. Both Daniel and Dante invaded her waking thoughts. Along with the lingering memory of her attack, it was pretty difficult to focus on work. Her mugging took some heat off her for a while, but Selina was sure an office affair sounded juicier than a random pickpocket did, as she had described the incident.
The slides clicked. Time to get her head out of her ass. She had a few more days before her meeting with Forrester, and her team seemed ready. She needed to control her emotions. Lately, her encounters with Daniel had become...intense. He never invaded her space, but his eyes told her he saw beneath her surface and wanted more. Suddenly, she noticed the lean muscles under his t-shirts. The molded tight form of his buttocks. The graceful, large hands as he held his coffee cup. When he turned his head, her fingers itched to touch the inky black strands of his hair falling over his shoulders. The scar on his face only deepened that rough sexuality automatically part of him.
At the same time she was attracted, she shrank at the thought of physical intimacy. The most she was able to handle was Dante holding her as she fell asleep. The comfort and tenderness balmed her soul. Selina wondered if she'd ever be able to be with a man in a sexual manner again without thinking of...them.