But they fought back and resurfaced anyway. My body was responding to the visual, heat building up in between my legs as I thought about Alex and what we'd done-or what I had remembered.
His body was against mine, pressing his hard and thick erection against me. I could feel the smoothness of his skin, the warmth of his breath as he whispered against my ear and neck.
A chill ran down my spine as I thought about the dream-the memory of that night. Oh, god … it was turning me on. It was fucking hot, and now I wished I could do something about it.
I put the empty glass in the sink and walked quietly back to bed. There was no way I was waking William up. That'd be wrong, so wrong. I lay in bed with my hand on my lower stomach, my pussy throbbing and clenching with need. I tried pushing the thoughts of Alex away and to focus on my relationship with William. But it wasn't happening. The dream was repeating over and over in my head. The way his hands felt. The way his lips felt pressed against mine. God, his lips were incredible. And then, just to torture myself some more, I thought about the kiss I actually did remember-the one he stole right before I left.
Had I not been engaged, I would've taken him up on every single offer he made. One-night stand or not, I would've been willing to make that into a multiple-night stand.
I crossed my legs, hoping to relieve the ache pulsing through me. God, I needed it.
Fuck it.
I roamed my hand down further underneath my panties and circled a finger over my clit. I tried to conceal my cries, but the ache was getting more and more intense. I palmed my pussy in hopes to relieve the pleasure building up. I bit my lip to hold back the moans, but I couldn't control it. My body was taking over. And it was greedy.
William started moving in his sleep and I froze. I didn't want to wake him up. I knew he had to be up early and if I woke him up for sex, I wasn't sure how he'd react.
He rolled over toward me. My eyes widened as I sunk a finger inside, needing to release the painful ache I had built up. An arm flung over my chest as he pulled me in closer, his nose trailing over my neck and to my ear. "I know what those sounds are, Mackenzie," he said in his deep, authoritative tone. I swallowed, blushing like I had just been caught doing something wrong. "Let me help you, darling."
He lowered his arm and grabbed my hand, pulling it out from my panties. I was so embarrassed I'd been caught. I'd never touched myself in front of anyone before and it felt like being caught with my hand in the cookie jar.
"I didn't mean to wake you … " I started, feeling guilty that I was disturbing his sleep.
"You should've woken me," he said directly. "I'll always take care of you, darling. Let me." He leaned in closer, sinking two fingers inside of me, filling me up completely just like I needed.
"Mm … " I moaned, arching my back. "Yes, there … "
He assaulted my neck with his mouth, trailing kisses up and down my jaw and collarbone. He shifted his body weight and began moving down my chest. He sped up his pace, building up the tension faster and harder. Oh, god … I was going to come thinking of the dream I had with another man! This was so fucking wrong.
I couldn't allow myself to feel guilty for long as he ripped an orgasm from me. My hands clenched the sheets as he rubbed the pad of his thumb over my clit, not letting my body relax for long.
"Wow … " I gasped. I was surprised he woke up, but I was even more surprised he'd wanted to join me in the first place.
It wasn't that our sex life was dull, but he was picky about his sleep schedule. He didn't generally interrupt it for anything.
He threw the covers off me and pulled me underneath him. He towered over me, ripping my shorts down my legs and him quickly discarding his. "Hang on, darling. You're all worked up, and I'm going to make sure you go back to sleep satisfied." He spread my legs open with his knee and pushed inside me. I was soaking wet with my arousal and as soon as I felt him, I was ready to come all over again. I wanted him to fuck me hard. I wanted it rough and emotionless. I wanted him to fuck all the memories away. As messed up as it sounded, I wanted him to punish me for what I had done.
"Do it fast and hard, William," I pleaded.
He leaned back on his knees and pulled both of my legs up, widening them as far apart as he could. He leaned his body back over mine and did exactly as I had asked. I came again with a hard reminder that I was his and he was mine. This was how it was meant to be. He saved me, and I owed him everything.
I TEXTED STACI as soon as I woke up. I couldn't stop thinking about Alex and how bad I had messed up. I felt guilty, but another part of me felt intrigued.
Who was this guy?
How had he managed to affect me in such a short amount of time and why had I allowed him in?
I had another memory of … that night … it was starting to haunt me in my dreams! I typed out, knowing she'd check her phone first thing once she woke up. What the hell am I going to do?!
She ended up responding twenty minutes later. She was a graphic designer and worked from home, but we managed to stay in contact throughout the day if we needed to.
I'm over here still trying not to freak out at the whole situation … :/
I sighed and frantically moved my fingers to text her back. That's not helping!
Sorry! It's just so … not you. I'm actually quite impressed. ;-)
I hate you.
No, you don't. So … was he big?
I about spit my juice out of my mouth as I read her last text. I'm heading to work now. BYE.
FRIDAY MORNINGS WERE the best and the worst.
It meant it was my last day of work for the week, but also, the longest. Fridays were prep days for the following week, and we didn't leave the office until it was completely finished. They were also for finalizing blog posts and articles, catching up on emails and making sure everything was set in place for the next week.
William was up and out of the apartment before my alarm even went off. I hardly heard him anymore. For a man who'd been single for quite some time before me, he was sure considerate while I continued to sleep. I especially loved that about him.
"Good morning, Miss Hewitt." My assistant, Chelsea, looked up at me with bright, eager eyes. She was my intern-she was me just a year and a half ago. I was quite easy on her but made sure she learned just like I had to do.
I still worked for Laura, except now I was paid more and worked longer hours. When William and I started being noticed by the public, and articles and pictures of us surfaced in the NY Post, she immediately hired me on. I was offended at first, upset that money and popularity were bumping my career up, but I knew I had worked hard for it. I had gotten myself into this program on my own, so for that reason, I was proud and accepted anything she offered me. I didn't want to be one of those girls-the ones who only got jobs or fame by their family name, or in my case, my fiancé's name, but I wasn't about to back away. Fashion was my life and I desperately needed the break.
Once I became her full-time assistant, I needed an intern assistant. I couldn't manage everything on my own. I was still building my career, hoping to move up the fashion magazine industry even more. I hoped to assist in the fashion decisions and runway choices. Someday. I was sure of it.
"Morning, Chelsea," I greeted back as she handed me my triple grande skinny vanilla latte. I was a coffee addict and not looking for help anytime soon.
"Your schedule is on your desk, and Mr. Lancaster left a message for you." She handed me a folded up piece of paper. I smiled and grabbed it, thanking her as I walked into my office.
On top of working under Laura, I was also trying to learn and engage as much as I could. I stayed for all the meetings, all the clothing ops, and boring discussions. I was determined to have a successful career no matter what.
William told me I could quit once we got married. Actually, he'd told me to quit already, but I said hell no. It's something we're compromising on because I won't give that part of my independence up. I've gone through too much and worked too hard to say the hell with it. Plus, I loved talking about fashion and being around clothes and shoes all day. It was something I was used to staring at a lot when I was a child. My mother and I would walk past stores, the ones with clothes hanging on too-skinny mannequins and I'd only dream of wearing something like that. She'd yank on my hand and tell me to stop fantasizing … "Stop dreaming about something that's too far out of your reach. You'll only end up disappointed."
To a point, she was right. But that only made me want to work harder.
Chapter Five
William and I had dinner plans at Vivolo Restaurant for a meeting. He had them regularly, so I knew the routine. We'd dress up, drink wine, and have casual conversation. I went for support more than anything unless it was mutual friends of ours. However, more often than not, it was for business.