"Where's the restroom?" Mackenzie leaned toward the girls to keep her voice low.
They pointed behind them to the right of the bar.
"I'll be right back," she said, picking up her purse.
She found the ladies room quick enough and surprisingly it was clean and well kept. When finished, she stepped into the darkened hallway and stopped. A man with his jeans pushed down his hips had a woman cornered and was clearly fucking her.
Oh, that man was not just having sex. Nope. He was all out punishing her with his body, and the woman wasn’t complaining.
Really? Right out in the open? They couldn’t wait to take it home?
"Derk," the woman cried out.
Mackenzie stiffened. Squinting to get a good link into the shadowed corner, she caught sight of the longer black hair, the tattooed arms, the jeans and steel-toed boots.
Immobilized, her legs couldn't move. Is that the type of relationship he sought after? Is that what he wanted in a woman? A whore who was willing to put out anywhere and everywhere? With no shame?
It wasn't as if they were in a backseat of a car, a broom closet, an empty bar, or anywhere else that would be better secluded than a hallway of a busy jazz club.
Derk grunted, pounding relentlessly into the woman’s body. Men passed by the duo, snickering with approval. Mackenzie watched, unable to peel her eyes away, partly fascinated, partly horrified. Yet another man who was supposedly interested in her, putting his dick into another woman.
Groaning loudly enough to echo down the hall, Derk continued to relentlessly thrust his body into the woman. After what seemed like forever, he stilled and shouted, his voice resounding off the narrow hallway walls.
Finally finding her legs, she turned and dashed back to the table, grabbed her purse and jacket, and ran from the bar. The last thing she wanted was to be seen by Derk. Plus, she needed to get the hell out of there and needed fresh air.
She rushed to the bus stop and waited to get a ride back to her apartment. A crushed feeling grabbed a hold of her heart and squeezed tightly in her chest. A silent, single tear escaped down her cheek. For the first time in her life, she began to lose hope. A place she never thought she’d get to. A place she’d purposely avoided, afraid of where the path it could lead. She’d seen the darkness take many in the foster system who’d been sucked down a black hole. Her entire life she fought to remain firmly planted on two feet. But maybe she wasn't meant to find a man who worshiped the ground she walked on or have a family of her own. Maybe this was the lonely life she was meant to live.
It wasn’t as if she had felt enough for Derk to warrant those emotions, it was that all she wanted in life was to be loved and desired by a man who gave a shit. Was that too much to ask from the universe? To want a stable life with someone who deeply loved her? She craved it. She felt the thirst for that life to her bones. Some days it ate away at her.
Swiping the tears from her cheeks, she took a deep cleansing breath. There were times when she needed to have a mental berating of where she was in her life. This was one of those moments. She needed to get a grip on reality and what was currently important. Get on her damn feet financially and emotionally and prioritize. Those needed to come first above everything. She couldn’t afford to dwell on her heartbreak or lack of love in a good partner or family.
She glanced at her inexpensive watch. Twelve-thirty at night. A cool fall breezed whipped around her. The black shift dress did nothing to warm her. She wrapped her arms around her body and waited for the bus to arrive. Her mind went back to her elementary school days and how often this same scene occurred then. Ironic how nothing had changed in close to thirty years.
***
"Are you all right?" Kayla asked.
Seated at the tiny kitchen table, Mackenzie sipped on her green tea. Last night she'd taken a header off the slimy bar at work and ended up in the ER with a goose egg on the back of her head. This morning she woke with what felt like nails being hammered into her skull.
She shook her head a fraction and winced. "No."
"Do you have pain meds?"
"Yes," she croaked.
"Did you take any?"
"Not yet. I have to eat before I take them," she quietly answered.
"I'll make you some toast," Kayla said.
After nibbling on the toast, Mackenzie took her prescribed medication then went back to bed, hopefully to sleep off the pain. Kayla promised to cover her shift tonight since it was clear she wouldn't be able to work. Really she needed to find a new job. The bar wasn’t exactly a wholesome environment. When she’d first been hired, she had no idea they required the girls to dance provocatively on the bar to certain songs. She’d been tempted to walk away that night until Kayla pointed out that for each song, their tips went up two hundred percent. And she desperately needed the cash.