"Ricky," Kim said, leveling her sister with a gaze. "That is the stupidest thing I have ever heard. They didn't even hook him up to a fluid drip. If he couldn't drink water, they'd have given him fluids."
"It's not that stupid," Ricky grumbled, arms crossed. "I read that a woman once got pregnant from giving a blowjob because she got stabbed in the stomach after swallowing."
Tricia stared at Ricky, the glass of water in her hands. Everyone was staring at Ricky. Her face reddened even more.
"Oh, just go ahead," she said. "I don't know what I'm saying. I'm just … fuck, Damon, you worried the shit out of us."
She directed that last bit straight at Damon, and wiped at a tear that rolled down her cheek.
Damon felt the first drops of water against his lips as Tricia leaned the glass towards him. He drank until he couldn't breathe, then sat back gasping, feeling the water do its work on his body. The world seemed a bit clearer. Unfortunately, everything seemed to hurt a little more, too.
"What's this?" he said, pointing to the IV leading into his veins. "If it's not water … "
"Pain meds," Kennick answered, still standing behind Cristov, who was staring down at Damon with an unreadable expression on his face. Somewhere between anger and fear and relief. Damon found himself unable to meet that gaze, kept his eyes bouncing between Kennick and Tricia.
"Stop them," he growled, grabbing at the tube that disappeared into his arm. "I don't want them."
"Oh, fuck no," Tricia said, lunging forward to grab at his hand. "You have no idea how much it's going to hurt without them, and you can't go around ripping needles out of your fucking veins. Do you know how much blood they had to put back in you already?"
"Don't care," Damon said, struggling as Kennick's hand joined Tricia's. Normally, he knew, he could break free in an instant. But this wasn't a very normal circumstance. He'd never felt worse, never felt weaker. The barest struggle left him feeling breathless and drained. "I don't want them. I want to feel it. I want to feel what he did to me. What I let him do … "
"Shut up," Cristov said, taking a menacing step forward. That, more than anything, made Damon's arm go slack. For the first time in their lives, Damon thought Cristov might actually try to hit him. They'd sparred before, practiced before Damon's bouts, gotten into verbal fistfights … but they'd never actually hit the other out of anger. Damon had never even feared that. He didn't fear it now. What was a little more pain? It was what it would mean that scared him. An unspoken vow finally broken.
"Cristov," Damon said, finally meeting his younger brother's eyes.
"Don't you fucking try to drop some psychobabble bullshit on me right now, Damon," Cristov said. Around them, the room was quiet, everyone seeming to hold their breath as the two brothers faced off.
"You nearly died. Do you understand that? What, it wasn't bad enough when you were doping? You had to risk your life again? Without telling us? Like we're nothing, like we're not family, like you don't owe us a fucking explanation? What you do … what you do involves all of us. You love sitting around, doling out pansy-ass advice like you're some goddamn phuro, like all our problems are your problems. But you don't think we're good enough to shoulder your burdens? Is that it? We're not smart enough, not strong enough?"
"Cristov," Damon said again, his brother's red face growing redder with each word.
"We need you, Damon," Cristov continued. "And you need us. You pretend like you don't, but you do. You need us."
"Cristov," Mina said, mimicking Damon with a softer voice, and rising from her chair to put a hand on Cristov's bunched bicep. He shook her off like a fly.
"Do you know what you almost missed? Do you know how much you would have hurt us? Did you ever even think about the people who'd be left behind? You've got a fucking niece or nephew to worry about now, Damon. I almost lost the chance to introduce my child to his uncle. His kako."
"Shit," Ricky muttered, breaking the sudden rise in tension in the room. She groaned, burying her face in her palms. Tricia and Kim were the first to turn to her.
"What the fuck," Kim said, and reached out to her sister, grabbing her roughly by the chin. "Ricky, you're pregnant?"
"Well, we didn't really plan on telling anyone like this," Ricky snapped, fixing angry eyes on Cristov, who turned to face her.
"Sorry," he said, not sounding very penitent. "It just came out."
"Whatever," Ricky said, pulling away from Kim's grip. "Can we focus on the issue at hand here?"
"Oh, I think the issue at hand just changed a lot," Kim said, her voice sharp. "How could you not tell me this? Ricky, you can't have a kid right now … "
"Um, last I checked, you're not in charge of my womb," Ricky said, turning to her sister with anger flashing in her eyes. "And, also, me being pregnant didn't just nearly kill me, so I think we still have bigger things to talk about at the moment."
"Oh, is that what you think? Well, let me tell you … "
"Kim," Kennick barked, turning to his wife. "This is not the time or place to have this conversation. You can be mad at Ricky later. But she's right. We're not gathered in this fucking hospital room seen daylight, the sky had looked like morning and then afternoon and then morning again.lent storm behidn way. Cristov pressebecause Cristov doesn't know how to wrap it up."
Kim opened her mouth to protest, but then she glanced over to Damon, as though remembering him once more. She shifted in her seat, closed her mouth, eyes lowering. Her fingers gripped the bottom of her chair, turning white. Ricky swallowed hard, turning away from her sister to find Tricia staring at her wide-eyed.
"You too?" Ricky said, sounding more resigned than upset. Tricia shook her head.
"Whatever makes you happy, Rick," Tricia said. "I just … I wish we found out in … happier circumstances."
Cristov grunted, dragging everyone's attention back to him. In the time that had passed, he had calmed down considerably. Damon had never stopped looking at him, letting his words sink in, revolving them slowly in his mind like a rock polisher, finding the glitter and gleam of truth underneath the anger and the vulgarity.
"Tell us why you had to do it," Cristov said, his voice soft but demanding. "We deserve to know why, Damon. Did you know they were after you? Did you think you were protecting us? Why the hell did you drive all the way to Florida for a fight?"
Damon glanced at Tricia, opened his mouth and closed it again. She reached out, took his hand in hers.
"It's not important," he said, looking back at Cristov. "It doesn't matter now. It's over. For me, I mean … "
"You don't get to decide what's important or not," Cristov snapped. "Not this time. And it's not over. Do you really think those guys are done?"
"I … I had a score to settle," Damon said, voice strained. "And now I'll never settle it. That's all. Nothing else matters. The story doesn't … ."
"Do me a favor, Damon," Cristov seethed. "I just dragged your bleeding, limp body away from a gaje who was going to kill you. So do me a favor and indulge me. I'm curious."
Damon's jaw clenched, sending a blast of pain across his face. He did his best not to flinch. He felt Tricia squeeze his hand, looked up at her.
"Just tell him, Damon," she said, sounding tired. He noticed, for the first time, that she looked tired, too. Everyone did. The collected bags under his family's eyes could have stocked a luggage store. And it was his fault. He'd done this. He owed them. Cristov didn't always say things in the smartest way, but this time he was the smartest man in the room.
"Are you telling me that she knows?" Cristov spat, turning his angry eyes on Tricia. "Before us? How long you've known her, Damon? Two seconds? And she's more worthy of the truth than your own damn family?"
"Shut up, Cris," Mina said. "He's going to tell us now. Right, D?"
Damon looked at his sister. She always managed to get him to spill. God knew how, but she did. Maybe it was just because she was a girl. Damon always found it hard, lying to girls. They always seemed to know. He sighed, looked down at his hands, and closed his eyes.
"Do you remember, when we lived in Providence … "
35
"Holy shit, I was right," Ricky blurted out. Kim shoved an elbow into her sister's arm, glared at her.
"What do you mean you were right?" Damon asked.
"Uh, nothing," Ricky said, returning her sister's glare. Damon kept his eyes on Ricky, though, sensing that she may have been putting her journalism skills to some use while they were looking for him.