“You will, no problem, and har-de-bleepin’-har.”
“That’s the spirit,” Charvat said, slapping the dash. Dust scattered like fruit flies.
A long, comfortable silence ensued as they bounced along the ridge. Another good sign, Charvat thought. Nothing worse than a partner who never shut up.
“You married, Derek?” he said.
“High school sweetheart,” Davis said.
“Nice when that happens. What’s her name?”
“Superstition.” He smiled at Charvat’s arched eyebrow. “It’s a long story.”
Charvat laughed. “Best ones are. You have kids?”
A long silence.
“No. We don’t have children.”
The flatness implied a touchy subject, so Charvat changed the subject. “What’s she think about picking up and moving?” he said.
“She’s psyched,” Davis said, rebrightening. “Sue loves Chicago, but the winters get her down. She’s a sunshine kinda gal.”
“We got even more sunshine than we do illegals,” Charvat said. “Though some days it’s a toss-up. She’ll like it just fine. Wanna call her with the good news?”
Davis scratched his head. “Well, sure, I’ll try, Chief,” he said, pulling out his phone. “But she sees it’s me, she might not answer.”
“Why’s that?”
“She’s trying to get laid.”
He let Charvat stew in that while he speed-dialed her cell. Not surprisingly, he got: At the tone, please leave a message . . .
He did, and Charvat goosed the accelerator over a hill. Davis felt like a kid again as they both went weightless.
“I trust there’s a story behind that little statement?” Charvat said.
Davis heaved a sigh as he pinked with discomfort. “Yeah. And to tell the truth, I wouldn’t mind talking about it,” he said. “But I hardly know you.”
“Easier, sometimes, with strangers.”
“I guess. Hell, Bee, I gotta tell someone. About what Sue does when I’m out of town. Sometimes, when I’m home, even.” He clenched and unclenched his fists.
Charvat nodded encouragement.
“She puts on this neon dress,” Davis said in a voice just above a whisper. “It’s cut up to here and down to there. She paints on lipstick and slips into do-me heels. She gets in her car and drives to known pickup spots in the city. Then she parks and starts looking for men. Women too, sometimes.” He cleared his thickening throat. “My wife is a . . . she’s a . . .” He waved his hands as if batting flies. “Ah, shit, man, I can’t believe I’m telling you this . . .”
“Say what you mean, Derek, it’s all right.”
Davis took a deep breath.
Chicago
They crossed under a neon sign that pulsed WI-FI/HBO/BEST RATES IN TOWN. John centered the Buick between two faded stripes, turned off the engine, pocketed the keys, and glanced at the hotel entrance.
He turned white as ricotta.
“Are you all right?” Superstition said, alarmed.
“Yeah . . . yeah . . . fine,” he muttered. Sweat poured off his bald spot, soaking his banana-colored collar. “Just a little . . . nervous, I think.”
“Being here with me?” Superstition said.
He nodded. She squeezed his arm.
“Aw, that’s sweet,” she said. The cell in her pocket vibrated. She ignored it. “But I’m a nice girl, honest. I wouldn’t hurt a fly. We’ll talk, get to know each other a little.” Her smile turned naughty. “Then we’ll have to do something about your handsome clothes.”
He touched a green parrot dampened by his flop-sweat. “You like, Fantasi?” he said, clearly pleased.
“Very chic. So, are you ready?” She watched him closely for signs of a heart attack. The last thing she needed was a dead john named, ironically, John . . .
“I’m sorry,” he said, dabbing sweat with a monogrammed handkerchief. “I mean, for being such a doofus. It’s just that you’re the first.”
I knew it, I just knew it. “Since she left you?” she said.
He nodded. Removed his glasses and dabbed at his eyes. “Yeah. My wife. Tabitha. Tabby. I thought we were doing great.”
“She thought otherwise.”
John shrugged. “She had me served at work. You know, with the divorce papers. She wanted everyone to know.”
“Wow, that’s cold,” Superstition said, meaning it.
“Yeah, I thought so.” John made a face, then sat a little straighter. “Aw, listen to me,” he said briskly, pulling the door handle. “You don’t want to hear about my troubles. Let’s go inside.”