Despite a positive game analysis from Dirk, where he'd ripped apart every forehand, backhand and serve in my last match, highlighting the good, encouraging where I could improve, I'd been on edge.
I didn't like lies and sitting next to Dirk for two hours while he gave me tips to take my game to the next level made me feel like a first-grade prick.
He'd warned me off his daughter. And I didn't give a shit. Not sure when the truth hit. Sometime between him praising my third return in the fourth game of the second set and Dirk suggesting I come to LA to meet with some of his old sponsors next week. I should've been over the moon. Sponsors meant money. Money meant security. Security meant following my dream of being the best.
But was it? Was playing in Grand Slams really my dream? Or had this game I'd first played to blow off steam snowballed into much more than I wanted?
I liked tennis. Tennis was good for me. It kept me centered and focused and the darkness at bay. But since I'd met Mia I'd realized that anger didn't need to fuel my tennis. I could win without it. The million-dollar question was, did I want to?
Because sometime during Dirk's analysis, I'd realized that I wasn't hungry enough. Winning Grand Slams wasn't the be-all and end-all for me. Initially I'd used tennis as a release, lately as a way to pay back my dad and hopefully gain his respect.
Now? It didn't seem to matter so much. Talking with Mia, tapping into feelings I hadn't known existed, made me see that I didn't need to play tennis to be a halfway decent human being.
I could do that on my own.
All I had to figure out was how to break it to Dad and where did that leave my future?
I entered my villa and dumped my workout bag near the door, spying a folded piece of paper that had been slipped under it.
I picked it up and opened it, unable to stop a stupid grin as I saw who'd written it.
EVERYONE ATTENDING CLUBHOUSE DINNER AT 6.
MEET ME AT THE POOLHOUSE.
M
Considering how fired up we'd got at the pool house last time, I couldn't wait to meet Mia there. Maybe I could discuss the stuff bouncing around my head, see what she thought. She'd been amazingly insightful so far and the crazy thing was, I couldn't imagine talking to anyone else about my private thoughts the way I did with her.
I knew this thing we had would end when she went back to uni and I figured out what the hell I wanted to do that didn't involve following a futile dream here at the academy. But I'd never expected to feel this … sad, at the thought of not having her around anymore.
A quick glance at the digi clock on the counter showed I had ten minutes to shower and meet Mia. Ten more minutes to mull answers to questions I was too scared to contemplate let alone want to acknowledge.
Questions like, how would I extricate myself from the deal I'd made with my dad? How could I leave the academy without pissing off Dirk and ultimately affecting my chances with Mia? And the biggie, why the hell was I even considering a future with Mia beyond her holiday fling?
No amount of vigorous shampooing or hot water cleared my head and as I headed for the pool house I couldn't help but hope things would be clearer once I saw Mia.
As corny as it sounded, everything seemed better when I was around her.
The pool house was in darkness, bar the solar-powered lights that ringed the pool. Perfect place for a secret assignation, as I'd found out the first time she'd followed me here.
The chlorine-tinged humidity engulfed me as I entered. "Babe, you in here?"
Silence, punctuated by the soft hum of the filter. Wishing she'd get here already, I sank onto one of the sun loungers and lay back, hands behind my head, legs outstretched.
I hadn't had much downtime since I'd arrived here. Every minute of every day was taken up by practice or team meetings or lectures from the sport scientists/psychologists/exercise physiologists. And when I wasn't on the court, I was expected to schmooze with my fellow academy wannabes. The rest of the time? I'd been with Mia. And that's what I wanted more of.
My eyes drifted shut as I imagined what we could've been like if we'd met under different circumstances. What it would be like to date her.
She was quirky and funny and beautiful, inside and out. I'd never met anyone like her. And I'd miss her more than I cared to admit.
"Glad you came, Big Boy."
My eyes snapped open in time to see Dani straddle me, lean forward and kiss me.
It took my befuddled brain several seconds to process what the fuck was going on and by the time I sat up, grabbed her waist to haul her off and wrenched my mouth away, it was too late.
Mia stood outside the glass door to the pool house, staring at me like I'd stabbed her in the heart.
"Get the fuck off me," I growled, shoving Dani away, not caring when she sprawled on the cold tiles at my feet. "What kind of a sick bitch comes onto her friend's guy?"