Alex watched round-eyed while she made the mayonnaise, leaving Sophy to reflect that she had after all gained something from her mother, for it was she who had taught Sophy to cook. She recognised now that she had absorbed a good deal of her mother’s housewifely skill almost without being aware of it.
At three o’clock Sophy heard a car stop outside. Instantly an explosive mixture of fear and excitement gripped her stomach. Watching Alex’s exuberant and totally natural pleasure, she wished for a moment that she too was free to welcome Jon back the way she wanted to but she had to be more circumspect, so she deliberately held back a little washing and then drying her hands, timing her arrival at the front door to coincide with Jon’s.
Her first thought was that he looked tired—far more tired than she had seen him looking before, and instinctively she reached out to touch him, withdrawing her hand as though it had been stung as she realised what she was doing.
‘You look tired.’ The words left her lips before she could stop them.
‘I could do with a shower...it’s no pleasure travelling at the moment—especially in a taxi without air conditioning.’ He bent down and picked up the overnight case he had put on the floor. ‘I’ll go up and get changed.’
‘Would you like a drink or something to eat?’
Jon paused at the foot of the stairs and shook his head. ‘No...I ate before I left.’ He took off his glasses and rubbed his eyes. Something he normally only did either when he was tired or when something was bothering him. Her love for him tugged at Sophy’s heart. She wanted to go up to him and wrap her arms round him but instinctively she was frightened of being rebuffed.
On Saturday afternoon Sophy made her weekly telephone call to her mother, something which was more a duty than a pleasure, especially when her mother still continued to make slightly disparaging references to Jon. For once though, she seemed uninterested in the subject of her son-in-law, rushing to tell Sophy the moment they had exchanged ‘hellos’.
‘The most shocking thing has happened—I can hardly believe it. Felicity has left Chris. Poor boy, he is absolutely devastated. He adored her, you know...spoilt her really. Of course I’ve done my best to comfort him. Girls do funny things when they’re in her condition but even so...’
Sophy listened while her mother poured out a good deal more in the same vein, inwardly thoroughly bored with the whole subject of Chris.
‘He may come over and see you,’ she told Sophy just as she was hanging up. ‘I told him you’d be delighted to see him. After all it’s a time like this that he needs his friends.’
‘Mother, I wish you hadn’t.’ Sophy was really angry but there was nothing she could do other than hope that Chris would have the sense to know that her mother was wrong and that Sophy was not likely to welcome him. She had sensed the last time she saw him that he resented the thought that she had found happiness with someone else and she had no wish to play the sympathetic listener to him. Shrugging in mild irritation she went back to her preparations for the meal.
Jon was outside with the children. Soon it would be time to call them in for their tea. She had got them a Walt Disney video to watch while they were having dinner and both of them had promised to be on their best behaviour. Not that they were ever particularly naughty, she thought fondly. Once everything was done she could go upstairs and get ready. Nervous butterflies fluttered in her stomach. She was dreading meeting Jon’s friends and being the object of their curiosity.
* * *
AFTER ALL HER apprehension about meeting Jon’s friends, Sophy discovered that they were a very pleasant, down to earth couple with whom she instantly felt quite at home. Mary-Beth confided to her over the salmon and cucumber mousse that she sometimes felt she must be the world’s worst cook and that even her ten-year-old daughter could make a better sponge cake than she did herself. ‘And doesn’t she just let me know it,’ she groaned with a smile.
Their two children, she explained to Sophy, were staying with her parents in North Carolina.
‘Harry has so many meetings organised for this trip that it just wasn’t worth bringing the kids with us. I can quite happily waste a few days shopping in London but the kids would hate that.’
She followed Sophy out to the kitchen when she went to get the main course, commenting as she walked in, ‘Jon says you haven’t had much chance to get to grips with the house yet. Of course, you haven’t been married very long.’
‘No,’ Sophy agreed with a grin. ‘And if it hadn’t been for the fact that the fault on the Nassau computer was relatively non-urgent, we’d have had to put the ceremony off completely.’
Mary-Beth’s eyes widened and she protested. ‘Oh, didn’t Jon tell you—and I thought it was so romantic too, but poor Harry was practically foaming at the mouth at the time—Jon refused to come out until after the wedding. He told Harry there was simply no question of him postponing it. Not even if it meant that Nassau would have to look for someone else. I must tell you that I was stunned. Jon’s a devoted computer man and always has been as long as I’ve known him. I was, however, delighted to discover that his work means far less to him than you. Fancy him not telling you.’
‘I suppose he didn’t want to at the time because he knew it would upset me,’ Sophy offered, trying to slow down the hurried racing of her heartbeat. Jon had done that. But why? Their wedding could have been put off...and why hadn’t he told her?
‘He’s obviously crazy in love with you,’ Mary-Beth continued. ‘We could tell that from the way he talked about you when he came to Nassau. Mind you there are some people who can never see a thing.’ She lowered her voice slightly. ‘One of the women who works on the Nassau project was really smitten with Jon. I told her he was married but she’s one of those super-intelligent females who always goes all out for what she wants. You’re lucky Jon is the faithful type, I wouldn’t be telling you any of this if he weren’t,’ Mary-Beth assured her frankly. ‘To be honest, sometimes Lillian worries me. I don’t know what it is...a sort of obsessiveness about her somehow, a facility to blot out everything but what’s important to her.’
‘Lillian.’ Sophy repeated the name lightly. ‘Jon mentioned her to me. He used her pool during his rest periods.’
‘Yes...I know.’ Mary-Beth pulled a wry grimace when she saw Sophy’s expression. ‘Look, you’ve got nothing to worry about...Jon’s crazy about you. He couldn’t wait to rush back home.’
Sophy smiled, sensing that the other woman was regretting ever bringing up the subject of Lillian. It was silly to be jealous of the other woman. After all Jon had married her; had told her that he desired her. But not that he loved her, she thought achingly...and that was what she wanted. She wanted Jon to love her in the same total and complete way she loved him. But despite everything that Mary-Beth had said to the contrary Sophy knew that he did not.
It was gone one o’clock when the Silvers left. Leaving Jon in the drawing room Sophy wandered tiredly into the kitchen and started to attack the washing-up.
‘Leave that. I’ll do it. You’ve done more than enough.’
Jon had walked into the kitchen so quietly that she hadn’t heard him and now he made her jump, almost dropping the plate she was holding.
‘You’re exhausted, Sophy.’ She caught his frown as he reached out and turned her round, taking the plate from her. ‘Go on up...I’m still wide-awake. I’ll get rid of this lot.’
She wanted to protest that she wanted to stay with him, that they could wash up together, go to bed together but she knew she could not. As she hesitated, still standing within the curve of his arm, she found herself wishing that he would at least kiss her, even if it was only one of the lightly affectionate kisses he gave the children. For a moment she even thought he might. His head bent and then lifted again, and then he was releasing her, gently pushing her in the direction of the door.
She wanted to ask him why he had lied to her about the urgency of the work in Nassau, but she knew she could not.
Even though she tried to stay awake until she heard Jon come upstairs, she fell asleep almost immediately the moment she got into bed, not waking until the alarm went off in the morning.
* * *
ON THE FOLLOWING Tuesday Jon got a phone call whilst they were working together in the office. Never a particularly vociferous talker, the brief, monosyllabic curtness of his responses made her lift her head from the correspondence she was studying. It was unlike Jon to sound curt or to look as frowningly involved as he did now.
When he had hung up, she asked automatically, ‘Problems?’
For a moment he seemed to hesitate and then he said bleakly, ‘Yes...’ He paused, and stared out of the window, and Sophy had the distinct impression that his mind was a long, long way away. They had never had that talk he had promised and in fact since the weekend she had been intensely conscious of a barrier between them.
‘I’m afraid I’ve got to go to London again. I’ll have to leave this afternoon.’
‘Will you be gone long?’