End of story.
Ava was dumb as hell and I couldn’t see the appeal of her either, but Jacob didn’t seem smitten with her so I didn’t feel like I had to worry about her. It was more of a passing kinda thing. Jacob was hard to please, and every girl that came in his direction realized it and then moved on. It became difficult for him to hold down a steady girlfriend, although I knew in my heart that eventually he would meet the right girl. It would be about timing for him, and that proved to be true when we were all older.
I wanted Aubrey to stay around, though, but I knew how Dylan was. I mean not personally because he guarded his crass and vulgar side when I was around. I wasn’t ten anymore, but I had heard enough things to know that there were two sides to him: one when I was around and one when I wasn’t. Aubrey put up with him and God knows I commended her for it. It took a lot to settle the bull inside of him. She had subtle ways of calming him like rubbing the back of his head. She loved his long hair. However, I thought maybe there were two sides to him with her as well, one that we saw and then one when they were alone.
Now Austin, he was a hot mess. I think it caught us all by surprise. I didn’t know what was up with that boy, and a huge part of me knew he didn’t either. I had heard our mama’s yell at him one too many times to wrap it up and think with the head that was on the upper half of his body, not the lower. I laughed just thinking about it. Austin and I were closest in age and it wouldn’t be until the boys left for college for us to truly form a bond without them around. I understood Austin in ways that the boys didn’t, he was a lot like me in the sense that he wanted to be one of them, possibly losing himself in the process.
I would turn fourteen in a few weeks and I still didn’t have any life experiences outside of the boys. I hadn’t dated anyone, kissed anyone else, or even been on a date. All the boys on the island were too scared to come near me because they knew I came with baggage.
Four of them.
My boys grew up. And by that, I mean they looked like men, tall, muscular and broad. They had the whole bad boy, intimidating thing down. One would think they had rehearsed the part their entire lives, or something. They protected me even more than they had when we were growing up, and it got to the point where I just gave up. It wasn’t worth it to me, having them all in my life was enough.
Especially Lucas.
The mere thought of them leaving in two years, and just having Austin for one more after that, it killed me every time it crossed my mind. I hated knowing that things would once again change.
Lucas and I were the same as we’d always been. We spent every chance we could alone in our abandoned house. It was our special place and no one could take that away from me.
From us.
I had a torn emotion in my heart. It was the same one that’s been there for so many damn years. A piece of me sustained the hope that maybe one day, there might be a chance for us. Exactly how our mama’s had told me a few years back.
I waited. Maybe someday there would be a place for us outside of our abandoned house.
Where he could hold my hand.
Where he could kiss me whenever he wanted.
Where he could be mine and I could be his.
Where he could tell me he loved me the same way that I loved him.
Waiting. That’s all I ever did.
Little did I know that life had a funny way of keeping you on your toes and making you see the reality of the world. I desperately and urgently tried to ignore what had been staring me in the face all along.
As I was about to walk out of the bathroom stall, the restroom door opened.
“I think tonight’s the night.”
I recognized her voice immediately, stopping me dead in my tracks.
Stacey.
“Oh yeah? What makes you think that?” another girl replied.
“Because we’ve done everything else. I know he wants to fuck me. He’s hard every time I’m around,”
I had to sit down on the toilet, my legs unable to hold my shuddering body.
“How is he?”
“Amazing! Of course, I taught him everything he knows. His cock is fucking huge, Mallory! It would definitely hit all the right spots, I can barely take half of it in my mouth.”
My hand rose to my lips, swallowing down the bile that threatened to escape.
“He’s a dirty boy, too, the shit that comes out of his mouth when he’s fingering me and I’m sucking his dick, Jesus! He’s ruined me for other guys.” They laughed, loud and throaty.
“Tonight’s the night. I know it. I’ll call you tomorrow and tell you all about it.”
I heard them walk out the door and it rattled when it closed. My body instinctively spun and heaved up everything I had eaten and drank. It came out in one swift motion of opening my mouth, disposing of the toxic words that I overheard.
Over and over again until there was nothing left inside of me, including my heart. I spit into the toilet and wiped my lips with the back of my hand. Opening the door, I went right for the sink to splash cold water all over my face, hoping that it would hide the truth that I had been denying for the last several years.
I’d been lying to myself and to everyone around me. It was all a dream, a hope. It was a young girl's fantasy.
Lucas wasn’t mine.
And he had never been. I stood there for a long time, dreading the reflection that would be staring back at me. I avoided the mirror and walked out of the bathroom instead, finding them immediately. I watched Stacey lead Lucas out of the restaurant and onto the beach.
I was no longer the girl waiting.
I was now...
Broken
Stacey walked beside me on the beach, hugging her body firmly around my arm. Her attempts of trying to hold my hand over the last few years were taxing, and she finally gave up. It was dark out, but the full moon illuminated the entire beach, producing a soft glow around us. No one was on the beach. We were alone.
“Come on,” she baited, pulling me under the pier. She laid a towel on the sand, laying her body in the middle propped up on her elbows.
Peeking up at me through her lashes, “Don’t you want your birthday present?” she rasped, spreading her legs open, showing me she wasn’t wearing any panties.
I watched her every move. Stacey was never subtle, and it only made things much easier for me.
“This doesn’t change anything,” I reminded her, sounding like an asshole, but I’d rather she knew what she was about to get herself into than lie.
I would fuck her if she let me but that’s all it would be. Nothing more, nothing less.
“I know,” she stated with hooded eyes and a confident demeanor.
“I don’t have a condom.”
“I do.”
Reaching for my hand she lured me onto the towel, sitting her body on top of my hard dick. I gripped her waist when she started to gyrate her hips in a back and forth motion, leaning forward, close to my face.
“That feel good?” she teased, swaying her hips slower and steadier.
“It would feel better inside you.”
She seductively smiled and slid down my body, stopping when her face was in front of my zipper. Grinning up at me with glazed eyes she unbuttoned my pants and then lowered the zipper, freeing my cock and putting it into her awaiting mouth. I watched her suck my dick like she had something to prove, enjoying the sensation she stirred in my balls. She unwrapped a condom and placed it on the tip of my head, rolling it down in one swift movement. Confirming what I already knew, she used me as much as I did her.
She climbed up my body with a slow, steady stride, till she hovered above me waiting for me to make the next move. I didn’t falter. Grabbing my cock I angled it toward her opening. My eyes shut as I clutched her hips, gliding her down my shaft, making my head roll and my back arch. The feeling was indescribable, way better than having her mouth wrapped around me. With my eyes closed it made it easier to pretend she was someone else, even though I knew she wasn’t who I desperately wanted her to be.
I felt her lips on my throat, licking and sucking all over, intensifying the sensitivity of being balls deep for the first time. I groaned loud and hard. Panting and trying to control the pace of her riding me, she took it as a sign to move faster, grabbing the back of my neck for good measure. She wanted me to look at her. I could feel her sex driven glare on my face. She moaned louder and heavier when I didn’t open my eyes, kissing my mouth, beckoning me to open.
I didn’t, pulling my face away.
It fueled her fire to work me over harder and more demanding, each sway of her calculated hips hitting every spot that drove me closer and closer to release. I couldn’t hold back any longer, it felt too fucking good.
“I’m going to come,” I huskily groaned.
“So come.”
I came so fucking hard I saw stars behind my eyes, my body spasmed uncontrollably. Every inch of me perspired. My chest heaved as I lay there catching my breath and steadying my heart. After this experience it only made me want Alex more. I couldn’t imagine what it would feel like with her.
“Want to do it again?” she moaned, resting above me.
I flipped her over. “Fuck yes.”
The second time lasted longer than the first. Stacey told me exactly what to do for her to get off, which felt un-fucking-believable on my cock. I tried not to picture Alex’s face but it was pointless.
When we finished, we went back to the restaurant. The boys were still playing pool, grinning like fucking idiots when they saw me walking up.