They all nodded in agreeance.
"So..." I continued, collapsing in a single sofa chair, "... has anyone seen Hawk? Is there any validity to this story?"
"There's no validity," came the rumbling voice that had been evading me all weekend. I looked up to meet his penetrating glare. "And I would have thought you of people would know that."
Was this a challenge?
I'd rise to it.
"I don't know what I know anymore, Hawk. I haven't exactly had the best forty-eight hours either." I stared at the man who still made me throb between the legs, who still set my heart aflutter, and now who still broke it every time I saw him.
"Well, let me set the record straight, Britta." Hawk stepped forward out of the shadows of the room he was in. His attention solely targeted at me, and I felt another three sets of eyes flicking between us. I looked at my brothers, who other than Slate, were puzzled by the intensity between us. Slate knew all this time. "The record is that there is no record. I don't know of this woman and I sure as fuck would have remembered if I had indeed... fucked her. She came into my life the same time you saw her throw herself at me. And since that point, she's continued to make her presence known. She didn't care who saw her get rejected, she didn't care if she made a fool of herself. And I can only wonder why that would be the case. It was like she put on a show every time."
"Forgive me for being ignorant, but you didn't exactly know about the other little situation, and you indeed did fuck her."
Hawk's jaw twitched. He was angry, and I would bear the brunt of it, especially if I kept prodding.
"The other situation is none of your concern."
Say what? None of my concern? Did he... did he just... dismiss me? Again?
"You don't get to dismiss me twice, Hawk Carnage."
"I didn't dismiss you. You walked away, remember?"
The fucking hide...
Rising to my feet, I prepared for battle. "I walked away because you chose Celeste over me. You chose to end what we had. This. Was. All. You." I was seething and Hawk never flinched.
"You two had a thing?" Ricky asked, dumbfounded.
We both turned to him.
"Yes, and you can shut up about it," I snapped. "It was a mistake from the start."
This time, Hawk did flinch. "A mistake? You think what we shared was a mistake?"
"Yeah, I do," I lied, fearful the emotions would take charge. I didn't want to cry in front of him. "You made a decision that affected both of us, and you didn't care how badly it hurt me."
"What about how it hurt me?"
I scoffed at this. "You did it without a second thought, Hawk. So please don't insult my intelligence by telling me otherwise. You've got yourself an instant family, and you practically jumped at it."
He took two steps forward until we were arm's length apart, the vein in his neck working overtime. "I don't want an instant family with Celeste. I want to start a family with you, Britta. I wanted my future with you."
This confession threw me for a six. I knew what I'd wanted out of the relationship, but Hawk had been the one who called it for what it was, ‘friends with benefits.'
My eyes started to sting with tears, a large lump forming in my throat. "You wanted to start a family with me?" I whispered.
"I still want that."
"You're an asshole."
A smile twitched his lips, and my heart caved. "You can call me any name you like... in bed."
"Ohhh okay..." Harry erupted. "We don't need to listen to your sex talk."
"Fuck, bro," Ricky started, shaking his head in disbelief. "We're still trying to get used to the idea of you two, so tone it down a notch."
I giggled, embarrassed members of my family had to hear that, and giddy to have Hawk flirt with me once more.
He pulled me in close, wrapping his muscled arms around my body and holding me tight. I started to cry against his chest, and it wouldn't stop.
Hawk whispered in my ear, attempting to soothe my sore heart, "Babe," he began speaking so only I could hear. "I'm sorry for everything," he continued to repeat the words until they began to sink in and I believed them.
Chapter 22
Britta
"I need your help."
They were four words that set my soul at unease. I'd never seen this side of Hawk. He was tired. Worried. And above all else, scared shitless.
And I didn't blame him.
We sat in Slate's bedroom with the door closed, and I allowed him to confide in me. There were a lot of unanswered questions, and to be honest, Hawk was in a lot of shit.
I listened as he started from the beginning.
Celeste.
"She was only a fling that lasted a few nights. And she only became a fling because I knew she was flying out." Hawk looked me dead in the eyes. "I don't love her, Britta. I never will. This baby..." he exhaled heavily, "... it was the last thing I expected. What I expected was to have children with you."
"Hawk, I never knew you felt like that. I thought we were just ‘friends with benefits.'"
"I said that so I didn't scare you off. You were still scarred from Roman, I didn't want to rush you into anything. But just know... it was always all or nothing for me."
I nodded, biting my lip because if I didn't, the tears would spill once more.
"When I found out Celeste was pregnant with my child, the first thing I knew I had to do was provide a safe and loving home for the baby. And in my head, I thought that entailed having to marry Celeste. I wasn't thinking straight. Just because I marry Celeste doesn't mean it would be a happy union . I guess I also feared you wouldn't want anything else to do with me if I had a child with some other woman, so it was more like a defense mechanism." Hawk took my hand in his and worked gentle circles with his thumb. "I see how I hurt you, and these last few days I've done nothing but think about you. Above all this shit, you were always my number one thought."
"Me too," I confessed. "Do you still think Celeste is telling the truth?"
He shook his head. "I'm starting to have my doubts."
"Why?"
"She won't let me come for the scans. She won't allow me to see the paperwork from the doctor. Basically, whenever I ask her, she changes the subject."
"She's using you?"
"There's a high chance."
"Leave it with me."
Hawk frowned, bemused. "Britta Valentino, what do you have up your sleeve?"
I smiled back as I considered my ingenious plan.
"What about the other problem with this.... um... Rita?"
Hawk dragged a hand over his exhausted face. "I have no idea where this one has sprung from. I should have given more thought to all those appearances she made. People are turning on me, Britta. People I once considered friends. Those who saw us at the party are saying it had to be true because they saw us kissing. It's almost like she..." he paused, "... staged everything, and made sure there were witnesses."
A thought struck me. "What if she did?"
"For what benefit?"
"I don't know what her motive would be. Maybe she has something to do with Roman or someone who wants something from you, or is holding a grudge?"
Hawks stood up and started to pace. "Plenty of those people." I could understand his annoyance over it. Hawk Carnage was a wealthy man, and his fortune continued to grow every day.
"Anyone recently?"
He stopped pacing and faced me head on, his expression a mixture of revelation and fury.
"David Renshaw."
We left Ricky's under the promise we'd both return and face my brothers' questioning over our relationship. Ricky still seemed bamboozled by it, Harry was irritated and Slate, my know-it-all brother, sat back with a smirk on his face and watched the drama unfold.
Once we arrived back at Hawk's penthouse, we sat in his office eating the Chinese takeout we'd grabbed on the way here and drinking whiskey. It was Hawk who had introduced me to it, and the flavor had grown on me.
"Why are you helping me, Britta?" Hawk asked, watching me intently. "I hurt you so much, so why help me?"
"Someone handsome and intelligent once told me that we had each other's back. Always. So here I am, watching his back."
He wrapped his hand around my neck and pulled to his lips. "You're fucking too good for me."
"If we keep believing in each other, we can beat the people who are trying to destroy you. One by one, we'll take them down."
With only the light of the computer and desk lamp illuminating the otherwise dark room, we theorized a few possible scenarios until we narrowed it down to one.
Rita Waltsworth was connected to David Renshaw.
It made sense.
A few weeks ago, Hawk had been receiving a constant stream of emails and phone calls from the Renshaw's propositioning him.
They wanted to buy Carnage Lingerie.
That was no secret.
Hawk, however, wasn't interested in listening to any negotiations or takeovers. In response to the constant pestering, Hawk threatened to pull his line from the Renshaw department stores. This incensed David Renshaw who began retaliating with threats of his own unless Hawk attended a meeting in San Antonio.
Then Celeste happened.
Hawk got distracted and he sent me to be a buffer.
"I'm sorry that happened, Britta. There were a few reasons why I did what I did. To give you time away from me so you could see what kind of scumbag asshole I was for hurting you, and to show Renshaw I don't give two fucks about his business proposition. Was he mad?"