Cockney:A Stepbrother Romance(60)

     



 



When I drop her back off at her apartment, she looks at me like I'm  completely nuts when I politely decline her invitation to come up for  for coffee "and maybe a little cream and sugar". Besides it being such  an over-the-top line, I'm just not interested. I mean shit, the old me  would've had her dress off halfway up the stairs; hell, the old me  would've probably fucked her in the bathroom of that 5-star restaurant.  But the new me feels pulled in too many directions, and is hounded by  too many demons, and is haunted by the memory of the one perfect girl  who no one is ever going to replace.



And as I roar away from the redhead's apartment, I wonder just how in  the hell I'm ever going to get Reagan Archer out of my fucking head.



P R E S E N T



We're giggling like fucking teenager as we stumble out of the shower,  barely toweled off and leaving wet footprints across the carpet. She  pushes me back in this big stuffed chair by the window of her room, and  before I know it, she's kneeling at my feet. When her lips wrap around  my cock, it's fucking miles better than every single one of the  multitude of fantasies I've had of this exact moment. Her tongue slides  across the underside of me as she begins to gently suck, and I'm just  done. I'm gasping for breath with my hands running through her long red  hair as she moans and swirls her tongue around me. When I warn her, she  only moans louder and sucks me deeper, and I explode inside her mouth as  I gasp out her name.



She giggles as she pulls away, wiping her mouth in this way that would  look just plain slutty with literally any other girl in the world but  her; on her it just looks incredible. She smiles shyly up at me as I try  to form words though the fog in my head. Our eyes meet and then I'm  pulling her up into my lap and kissing her neck and feeling her whimper  softly into my ear.



"You trying to kill me, Red?" I growl, nipping at her earlobe and loving the way it makes her gasp.



"No but I'm starting to see the appeal all those other girls found in you."



She's giggling, teasing me, and I groan as bring her lips to mine;  "there are no other girls but you, you know that right?" She's kissing  me, and then as her hand drops to my lap she starts to giggle again



"Oh my God-"



"What?"



She laughs- the sound so fucking beautiful and musical; "Hudson-" Her  eyes are wide and her cheeks are blushing bright red as she nods at my  cock, standing straight up between us; "You're still, um-" She's trails  off, and I shrug, not being able to help but add in a smug smirk at the  fact that I'm still hard. Reagan bites her lip; "Do you- um, do you have  one?"



Fuck. Of course I don't. The old me had them stuffed into every pocket I  owned, but of the course the second the new me needs one more than a  dying man needs water in the desert, I'm without. She sees the  hesitation on my face and smirks as she reaches for her purse on the  table next to us; rummaging around before coming out with a little foil  packet in her hand and an adorable pink glow to her cheeks. I raise my  eyebrows teasingly and she rolls her eyes; "You should probably check  and make sure it isn't expired."



She's grinning at me as our eyes meet, and I feel so fucking close to  this girl without even being inside her that it practically knocks the  wind out of me. I'm not used to feeling this emotionally exposed with  someone; this naked. In fact, even with all the women before, I'm fairy  certain in that moment that I've never felt quite like this before; the  sobering epiphany hits me that this is what making love feels like. She  looks at me, so innocently, and so full of need that I'm suddenly  terrified of shattering everything that she with the burden of what I  carry.



"Reagan, you know we don't have to do thi-"



"Hudson will you shut up and fuck me already?" She leans down and kisses  me, sucking my lip between her teeth, and that pushes me right over the  edge.



I tear open the packet and roll the condom down over my length before my  hands are grabbing her ass and moving her up to my tip as she squeals.  And then I'm feeling her slide down on to me, and it's like heaven and I  could die right here. She's like warm silk around me as we move  together like the movement of an ocean; rocking together like a tide  upon a shore. I'm gentle at first, but the way she starts to dig her  fingernails into my shoulders and the way she bounces up and down my  length making these sexy as hell little cooing sounds has me grabbing  her harder and pumping my hips to meet hers. She grinding against me and  whimpering as my hands grab the soft skin of her ass hard enough to  leave marks as I start to fuck her hard. I can feel her tightening  around me, her muscles clutching at me and her mouth hanging open as I  kiss her and then slide my lips to ear; "Come for me, Reagan; fucking  come for me right now." I muffle her screams with my mouth this time as  she goes to pieces around me, and it's more than I can take. I see stars  as I roar my release into her kiss and explode inside of her.



When we've caught our escaping breaths and racing hearts and moved to  the bed, I'm curled up next to her. And for the first time in maybe  ever, I'm not counting down the seconds until I can leave.



She yawns into my chest as she snuggles against me, worming her way  deeper into my arms; "We shouldn't fall asleep like this" she says  sleepily.



I nod, feeling my own eyelids weighing heavily down; "Definitely not."



I can feel her lips smiling against my skin; "But Hudson, would it really be so bad if … "



I'm waiting for a full five seconds for her to finish her sentence until  I grin as I hear the soft rhythmic breathing of her sleep. Before I can  even convince myself to stop, I'm holding her tightly against my body  as I let sleep take me under, and for the first since longer than I can  honestly remember, I don't dream at all.



And it's wonderful.





P A S T



I quietly hang up the phone and stare at the wall of my apartment for a  second before I let the air out in a slow stream. The empty, sort of  blank feeling inside is weird, especially since I know I should be  feeling something much more right now. When your friend calls to tell  you that your boyfriend's been cheating on you, there's a certain way  you're supposed to feel and react.



Except, I just don't.



And a lot of that might be because there wasn't exactly a whole lot  there anyways with Chet. He was more like a companion, and kind of an  annoying one at that than any sort of romantic role. Movies are full of  dramatic encounters and fiery kisses and unbridled passion, and I know  that's all Hollywood bullshit, but I also know that I've seen that sort  of passion. I've felt it, if only once and if only for one brief kiss,  but that one kiss with him is better and more memorable than anything  I've known since.



So, no, I'm not mad that Chet's apparently been fucking one of his interns, I'm just sort of sad, I guess.



I open my phone, and almost like second nature, I'm scrolling down  through my contacts until I see Hudson's number there on my screen. It's  right where it's been for over a year now, sitting there in front of my  face with my thumb hanging half an inch above it but never actually  touching it and actually going through with calling him. I don't even  know what the hell I'd say to him at this point, even though for a while  I was so mad I even wrote down all the poisonous vitriol I wanted to  hurl at him. But now- now it just seems like a faded and sad dream.



Wow, look at me. I've just been cheated on and dumped by my boyfriend,  but all I can think about is the man who broke my heart a full year ago.  I take a deep breath and look at the number once more, and I know it's  time; I know it's time to let him go. I slide my thumb across his  number, and before I can stop myself, I'm hitting the little red "x"  there to delete the contact. And just like that, he's gone.



P R E S E N T



There's the usual fog that accompanies waking up when I first open my  eyes, and as sunlight glows around the drawn curtains, I find myself  lazily stretching as I yawn and roll over - right into Hudson. Suddenly  I'm wide awake and panicking, and I jump out of bed and back away from  it, as if being near him somehow makes it more real and more than I can  handle right now. Holy shit, I slept with Hudson. My hand flies to my  mouth as my eyes go wide, suddenly thinking of all the repercussions  that could come of this; my campaign, the funding from Archer Holdings;  God, the media if they got ahold of this?



I realize I'm pacing and chewing at my cuticles again, and I force  myself to stop as I turn and look at him, still sleeping heavily in bed.  The covers are pulled most of the way down on his torso as he lies on  his stomach, and my eyes trace over the inked and scarred skin there;  his back rising and falling slowly with his breathing. A flush creeps  into my face as I think about last night with him, and how freaking  incredible he felt in that first delicious moment of penetration.  There's a feeling of stinging guilt that I'm standing here regretting  last night while I stare at the man that's made me happier in one night  than I've felt in a long time. But then the panic hits me again; fuck, I  mean what if somebody heard us? My face gets hot as I try and think how  loud I might have gotten the previous night. Or what if someone puts  two-and-two together when they see that Hudson's bedroom door is wide  open and his bed still made?