Claiming Serenity(42)

Her moan was like a melody, rich, heavy with something that ached from her skin. “Donovan,” she said, trying one last time to deny him. “I don’t think we should do this anymore. It’s getting too complicated.”

“Why? What happened?” Sliding his finger up her naked chest, Donovan pulled her shirt off, watching her eyes, trying to measure if she really didn’t want him touching her. But that concern, that hesitation disappeared and he took the opportunity to kiss her throat, to inhale the decadent scent of her body. “Talk to me, brat.”

“Mollie… she… lower. Please. Right there…”

“Mollie?”

“Saw… saw us tonight… at… at Joe’s.”

Donovan stopped, pushing away from Layla and the heavy breath that left her open mouth. “Did she tell the others?”

Layla moved her hands over her chest, covering herself. “No. She wouldn’t do that. We keep each other’s secrets.”

He waited, his own hesitation pulling too many questions, too much thought into his head, but he kept his fingers on that beautiful pale skin, absently rubbing his thumb over her navel. “Do you want me to stop, Layla?”

They stared at each other, pausing for permission, for a rejection Donovan hoped wouldn’t come and then Layla smiled. “I like when you touch me.”

“I like touching you. You know that.” He tugged off his shirt and laid back against his headboard. She watched him, gaze taking in his movements as he snuggled against the pillows and lifted his arm to rest on the top of his head. He bit his lip once, ravenous with the look she gave him, the tiniest lick of that small, pink tongue across her bottom lip and those perfect, round nipples pebbling hard as he stared at them.

“Come here,” he said, wanting her, just then, but knowing that she needed a moment to calm, to have those worries so evident in the slow way she moved toward him, eased. He let her come to his side, right against his chest and for the first time, Donovan held her tight against him. “I’m not the kind of guy you need.” She sat up, looking at him. “I’m no Prince Charming. I’m not good for anyone and I doubt I ever will be.”

“So do you want this to end? You have doubts?”

He hated the idea of never touching her again. He hated that being without her touch, her taste, would bother him greatly, and if he were a better man, a stronger man, a decent man at all, he would tell her to go. Donovan knew that if he were the kind of man he once was, before betrayal and disappointment fractured whatever he thought he might want one day, then he’d thank Layla for her time and attention and tell her his doubts were too great, that their moment had passed.

But this Donovan was a selfish bastard on his best days. Still, he’d give her something, likely not what she deserved, but something he’d never given to any woman. Ever.

“If I said I didn’t care about you, that would be a lie. I do. Am I in love with you?” He waited, measuring her expression, relaxing when she didn’t look afraid. “No, sorry, I’m not. But I like the way we move together. I like that I can get lost in your body.” I like the way I can still smell your perfume on my pillow after you leave, he said to himself. “I like that you let me do things to your body that I’ve only ever dreamed about.” I like how free you are with me. How beautiful you look when you’re underneath me, falling to pieces. “I like that you don’t ask for anything but my body, for the way I make yours feel.” I love how you let me take you, let me love you like we won’t have another second of this in life.

He expected her to be disappointed. Most women were when you told them you didn’t love them, but Layla wasn’t a typical woman and they had never professed any desires for anything more than moments and spaces of want being fulfilled.

But Donovan could see something working behind her eyes, something in the way she didn’t smile, in how she faced him, stared over his face as though what she’d say next had to be considered and carefully spoken.

“Maybe… I dunno, maybe we should set some ground rules.” Donovan didn’t like where this was going, but let her continue. “I… one day I want something with someone who will love me. You can’t give me that and I can’t spend the rest of my life sneaking into your bed.”

“You want to date someone else?” He told himself he would not be upset if she found someone. Despite their own relationship, Layla was a good person, and good people tend to gravitate toward each other. They fell in love and got married and did all the things that normal people are expected to do. If she wanted that and knew he couldn’t give that to her then, logically, he couldn’t be angry at her for that.