"Not even if I tell you that I've learned my lesson?" queried Quinn. "Not even if I swear on my life that no matter what hardship comes up, I want you by my side, helping me to get through it?" Ben felt Kara tense at Quinn's words.
"Oh, Quinn," she said sadly. "I just don't think it's in your nature to lean on someone. I want to believe you, but my heart just can't handle being disappointed again. Can't we just enjoy some time together?" she begged.
* * * *
Quinn got up from the other chair and knelt before them. "You only have to ask from now on, and it's yours." It was a vow he meant never to break. Quinn watched his hands tremble as they cupped her cheeks. "May I kiss you?" He watched her carefully.
"Oh, yes." He didn't see any trepidation in Kara. He saw relief, which blessedly matched his own. But after every misstep that he had made, he had to ensure her pleasure. He lowered his head slowly, watching as her eyelids fluttered shut and her lips parted. He skimmed his mouth across hers, back and forth, waiting patiently until he heard that slight exhale of breath that told him she was relaxing into the caress. Then he pressed deeper, moving one hand from her cheek to gently cup the back of her head, tilting her ever so slightly so he could slant their mouths together for an even deeper joining.
Then he felt it. The sigh of pleasure that calmed and soothed every nerve in his body as it simultaneously heated and aroused them. He carefully pulled back from the kiss, exalting in Kara's whimper. She opened her beautiful blue eyes that were clouded with desire. Her white-gold hair fluttered in the sea breeze, and he brushed it from her face.
"Are we good, sweetheart?" Quinn watched as she gave a slight nod, but he needed more. He put his lips next to her ear. "Kara, please tell me. I can't handle doing anything wrong."
"I want you, Quinn," she whispered just as quietly into his ear, touching the scruff of his whiskers.
"I need you to be sure. We can wait until you've had time to really think this through. We know it's a big step, after everything that's happened between us." As much as Quinn wanted this woman in his arms, ensuring that she felt no emotional duress was far more important.
"Knowing that I've told you everything that has gone on, that I've told you exactly how I've felt and I finally know that you've both heard me, well, it's cleared up some of the things that have been clogging me up inside, you know?" Kara's voice trailed off. Quinn had to brush back her hair again, so that he could see both the confusion and truth in her gaze.
"I think I understand."
"So do I, Kachawli," Ben said as he stood up, holding Kara in his arms, letting her slide down his body so that her feet touched the deck. He touched his forehead to hers. "I didn't want to hear everything you had to say, but I needed to hear it, and I'm not sure that makes sense either."
Quinn watched as she turned shyly toward him, still keeping Ben in her field of vision. "Can you both touch me … at the same time? I've dreamed of that." Another layer of anxiety faded away at her request. He looked at his brother, and as if they could read each other's minds, their arms wrapped around Kara's shoulders and waist as they both moved their bodies in close enough to touch. Neither of them brought their lower bodies in connection with hers, wanting to ease her into that level of intimacy.
Kara leaned her head against Ben's chest as Quinn wrapped his arms even tighter around her waist and dropped his chin on top of her head, his front to her back. They stayed like that for long moments, until Kara started to wiggle backward, pushing her ass against Quinn's groin. Quinn groaned in pleasure. Perspiration broke out all over his body at her sensual writhing. He glanced at his brother, who was suffering nearly as much, because as she pressed back against him, she was pressing her breasts against his chest, causing him to pant in reaction. Both men were in agonized ecstasy.
"Kara, sweets, we need to go below deck if we intend to go any further," Quinn knew his normally raspy voice was almost unintelligible.
"What?"
"Below deck. Kara, we're out in the open," Ben explained.
Chapter 13
Kara was grateful for Quinn's steadying grip. The sea breeze felt good as she stood upright. It helped to clear her head, not to change her mind. It just helped her focus on the long-lost sensations of being sandwiched between these two men. She leaned forward against Quinn. It seemed appropriate that her nostrils were filled with a mixture of his scent and the smell of the sea, since she had always associated him with the ocean. Quinn turned, taking her with him, and both of them guided her toward the ladder stairs that led to the lower level, toward privacy. She would have loved to continue here in the open air, but she wanted nothing to intrude on the intimacy that they would be sharing.
Quinn went down first. She followed, with Ben behind her. She knew that it was just one more way that they had of showing concern for her wellbeing. When Quinn reached the floor, he turned and lifted her off the last two steps into his arms. She wrapped herself around him, relishing his strength. He walked with her down the small hall to the intimate master suite. She could see Ben following. None of them were smiling. It seemed a solemn occasion. Kara wished she could break the mood, but knew of no way.
The bed filled the room. There was very little room to maneuver, but that was fine with Kara. Everything she planned to do, she planned to do in the bed, or on the bed. Quinn set her down, and pulled her arms from around his neck, keeping them lifted so that he could tug the hem of her sweater over her head. He threw the garment onto the floor and just stared at the overflowing breasts in front of him. In the past, he had been the one who had lavished the most attention on her breasts, reveling in every color and texture. She shouldn't have been surprised at his reaction to the larger cup size, but she was. "God, sweetheart," he said. "You were magnificent before, but now … " That was when it happened. The laughter was back.
"Nothing's changed, you always loved my tits."
"Sweetheart, I can't believe how much more there is to love!" Quinn quickly found the front clasp of her bra and filled his hands with her breasts. Looking down, Kara gasped as she had a flashback to the first time he had touched her there. He looked into her eyes. "I remember, too," he whispered.
"Oh, Quinn, the contrast … " She had to stop. Trying to find the right words, she continued. "The colors, the textures … It's a symphony." Kara couldn't look away. She felt Ben at her back. His fingers traced up and down her backbone, up and down, then down and up, causing her to shiver. She saw her breasts quake in Quinn's hands and his hold firmed. Oh, the effects these two men were having on her body. She waited, holding her breath, hoping. Finally, Quinn moved his thumbs and began brushing them against her turgid nipples. She couldn't believe the deep moan that came from her throat. Ben delicately bit down on that spot where her neck met her shoulder, and the moan became a cry of need.
"Please." Just the one word, but it was enough. There was no teasing. These men were intent on meeting her wants and needs. The laughter and lightness she had tried to instill was overlaid by reverence.
"Kachawli, lie back." Ben wrapped his arms around her shoulders and eased her down so that she was lying on the bed. Quinn's hands were smoothing down the swell of her abdomen.
"Kara, you are so soft and lovely." And just like that, any fear that she had about the weight she had gained in her middle dissipated. Quinn's hands made quick work of the fastening of her jeans, and he pulled them off along with her cotton panties.
She wished she was wetter for him, for them, but she was still so nervous. She was feeling more and more confident that this was the right decision, that she could have sex with them. But then she would get the feeling that it was making love, and that scared her, and she would get nervous. It seemed that too much was happening at once, and the more she thought about it, the more she got into her own head, and the less she could stay in the moment. The less she could stay in the moment, the less she could stay in her body.
"Kara, sweetheart, did you hear us?" Quinn asked.
"What?" She was lying between both of the men, and they each had their shirts off. Oddly, she didn't remember any of it happening. She scrambled to get up, but Ben rose up on his elbow and gently held her down, placing his hand on her stomach.
"Hold on for a minute, okay, Kara? I promise you, you're in control. You can leave whenever you want. You're in control." The words immediately calmed her, and she settled back down on the bed. "Here, let's get some pillows for you, so you can sit up a little. Would you like that?"