Christmas with Her Ex(53)

And suddenly she knew. She didn’t want to go. Didn’t want to leave without seeing Connor one more time and telling him she loved him. He’d said he’d come to Australia but what if he never came? What if something happened to his grandmother and he couldn’t come?

It was her own fault. She’d been a quitter. Waking up to Connor’s gifts Should have been the moment she grasped, not run away from. Should have jumped in a cab to him then and there.

And now it was too late. Her pride and her stupid independence had ruined it for her again. She turned around and dragged her suitcase towards the door but even that was difficult to traverse.

Then Kelsie saw Connor arrive and blinked. Or perhaps it was just someone she thought looked like him because she wanted him so badly.

No. It was him and she could feel a smile stretch right across her face. He must have been to her hotel. And the joy that had flooded her made no bones about the truth. She loved him. How could she have been so blind? It was as though for the very first time she could see who he really was. How wrong she’d been. Twice. She didn’t deserve his love but she wanted it. All of it. She dragged her suitcases across the floor.

She should have known that loving Connor wouldn’t take away her independence, it would bring out the best of herself. She’d so looked forward to travelling on the Orient Express, but it seemed learning to love Connor had been her true journey. If only he’d have her.

And here he was so it looked like he would have her. The man was tenacious. Even now he was giving her another chance when she’d been so determined to climb on her high horse and fly off into the sunset. Fool. But she was such a lucky fool.

She watched him cross the floor to her left. Striding tall and straight and commanding. Connor, here, opening himself up to the risk of being knocked down again. She shook her head in wonder. He’d already been let down by her so badly once before and she didn’t think she could ever be that brave.

Or maybe she could?

She saw him hesitate, glance around at the sea of faces, and then he straightened and that determined look she remembered from old crossed his face. His eyes began to systematically scan the crowds. Looking for her. She dropped the handles of her bags and stepped forward towards him.

Connor felt a tap on his shoulder. ‘Excuse me. Would you like my seat, sir?’

He spun around and she was smiling at him. Sky-blue eyes. Snub nose. That mouth. Here in the milling crowds, looking up at him like she’d known he would come.

Then she said something amazing. Something he’d waited fifteen years to hear. ‘It’s not a seat I want to give you.’ She stepped into his arms. ‘It’s my heart. If you’ll have it.’

And there was love light shining from her beautiful eyes. For him. He couldn’t believe it. But he couldn’t mistake it. She was lifting her face to his, waiting for his kiss. ‘Merry Christmas, Connor.’

He gently touched his lips to hers. ‘Merry Christmas, my love.’ And he lifted her off the floor and spun her in his arms. ‘I love you, you know. Always have. Always will.’

‘I’m sorry, Connor. It was me who had the issues. I was scared of falling in love. Scared of losing my independence when I’d only just seen the possibilities. I put that on you. You never deserved it and I’m sorry.’

So many things made sense now. Even, perhaps, the man he was now. The way he’d organised everything when they had been younger. How he’d tried to think of everything. Kept her safe because he couldn’t bear to lose her.

Connor looked down at her. Wonder and joy were bubbling inside him. ‘We were both young. And I did organise you a lot. And when that blew up in my face I thought I could control my emotions and it wouldn’t happen again. Until I saw you again and you had me back on the ropes.’

‘You are the bravest man I know to take me on.’

He grinned. ‘Not as brave as Max. For taking on Gran.’

She had to laugh at that. Then had a thought. ‘You don’t live with your gran, do you?’

‘No. No way. I love her dearly but we’d kill each other.’ He smiled. ‘I have a flat near Tower Bridge. Scared, were you?’

‘No. Just wondering if we had to live in England all year round. The weather is very different from what I’m used to.’

‘I’m sure I can think of ways to keep you warm. And Max and my grandmother will sort out their own lives.’ He smiled at her. ‘And together—’ he stressed the word ‘—we’ll decide the rest.’

She liked the sound of that. A lot. She remembered her presents and the little Christmas tree. Leaned up and kissed him. He tasted wonderful so she did it again.