Max’s affection for Nick only made things more difficult. As young as he was, could Max tell a difference in his mother when she was around Nick? Could that be part of the pull Max had toward Nick—Max’s yearning for that perfect little family that his classmates seemed to have?
Abbey got up and pulled her hair back, straightened her clothes that had been wrinkled from sitting on the floor while party planning, and got herself ready to go out. She needed something to keep her mind off Nick for a while, and she had to buy items for Max’s gift basket at school. She thought about the theme: “Stay Warm and Comfy.” She knew very well what made her feel warm and comfortable, but she couldn’t think about that now.
* * *
Abbey had been shopping for an hour. Every year the school classes created Christmas gift baskets to be auctioned off. They were huge, over the top, foil- and plastic-wrapped prizes that were so well planned and presented that they fetched anywhere from fifty to a hundred dollars per basket. The money was then given to the students in need for supplies, winter clothing, and food. The list of items for the gift basket was crinkled in Abbey’s hand as she held on to the shopping cart handle. She smoothed it back out and read the list of suggestions: quilt, slippers, bathrobe, decorative pillow…
Last year, the theme had been “A Day of Fun,” and the basket had been filled with movie passes, bowling gift certificates, children’s painting kits—all sorts of things. Abbey had purchased what she could afford that Christmas. She’d donated a box of microwave popcorn. She wanted to donate something wonderful, something so decadent and irresistible that the basket would bring in a ton of money for those kids in need. With her artistic eye, she could make those baskets amazing. She just didn’t have the free cash to do it. As she looked at her list, she had no fear this year.
Abbey had decided to visit a small shop that was full of unique, upscale gifts. It was there that she found a quilt in gorgeous blues and creams and turned over the tag. Fifty-five dollars. She put it in her shopping basket and tried to keep the smile from spreading across her face.
After Vince left, Abbey had changed everything about the way she lived. Her free spirit had been crushed just a little when things hadn’t worked out. And then having Max had made her feel like any blunder could be disastrous for him. As a single young woman, she could live without a dinner one night or camp out on a friend’s couch if she couldn’t afford an apartment, but she would never dream of causing an upheaval like that for Max. She saw her free spirit in him, and she didn’t want anyone or anything ruining that. Childhood had been the one time when she’d felt invincible. She wanted that for her son. Now, when all his classmates brought in their items, even though he may never notice the difference in his contribution, she had the satisfaction of knowing that she and Max could provide something wonderful for the school.
Wouldn’t it be nice to make a living all the time like she did with her decorating job? Maybe it was the Christmas music piping through the store, or the decorations hanging from the ceiling, all the happy faces plastered along the walls… She thought it could be possible to start her own business. As she walked through the shop, her mind traveled to the what-if’s that didn’t seem so far fetched anymore. An interior designer needs an office. She couldn’t meet with clients in her apartment. She didn’t even have an empty room. That would take money. …Money that she had from doing Nick’s house. She could snap photos of her mother’s, of Caroline’s, and of Nick’s and take out a few ads.
If she didn’t try, she’d never know. Caroline would move away, and she’d find herself nursing again, her hours sporadic, her mother having to get up in the middle of the night and watch Max for her again. Could she have a better life if she just let go of her worry and tried this? Maybe she could start something part time… As scared as she was, all the ideas were flooding her, and the thrill of it was filling her with every step.
As she walked along the aisles, the quilt in her basket, she let her eyes slide along every shelf. There were so many wonderful things that she wanted to buy them all. She was heading toward the register when she stopped right there in the store and gasped quietly. Slowly, she reached out and grabbed the book off the shelf. It was deep brown rich leather, and it was made for holding music. Abbey ran her fingers along the front where it advertised possible engravings on a gold plate on the front—monograms, names… She knew what she wanted to put on the front. Beside it was a new book of sheet music for Christmas carols. She grabbed it and took it all up to the register.