She drags me into the room across from the master bedroom and stands in the middle of the room, telling me where everything will go. She’s months away from her due date, but this is typical Hannah. Always organized and never missing an opportunity to decorate.
“We’ve decided to keep the sex a surprise. Greyson says there are so few of those in life, and we want to wait to find out.” She smiles to herself, rubbing her stomach. She’s not showing yet, but it’s adorable the way they are both already so affectionate over her tummy.
“I think that’s a great idea, Han.” I reach out to put my hand over hers. “You are going to be an amazing mom.”
“What the fuck, Lennon?” she shouts, grabbing my wrist and pulling my hand up to her face for inspection.
“Oh, that.” I smirk. It’s only been two days since I clocked Kelsey in the face and my knuckles are a little banged up.
“What do you mean ‘oh, that’? What happened?” Her eyes are darting back and forth between my face and my knuckles. “Does this have something to do with Jami?” She asks.
“Yes.”
Her eyes widen and anger settles into her pretty features.
“Not like that. Easy, killer.” I wave my other hand sideways between us. “It was Malibu Barbie.”
“No way!” Hannah covers her hand with her mouth. “Did you hit her?”
“Yup,” I say.
“Oh my god!” she squeals. “What happened?”
It only takes me a couple of minutes to fill her in on the entire debacle that was our Friday night. She gasps in all the right places, and I have to work to calm myself down a few times as I relive the entire moment of seeing her there, naked.
Hannah scowls. “I fucking hate her.”
“You and me both,” I answer.
“You should have hit her twice.”
I roll my eyes dramatically. “I wasn’t really aiming for assault charges or anything, Han.”
She cocks an eyebrow at me, nodding her head. “You’re right. You’re too pretty. You’d never do well in prison. You’d be some big lady named Helga’s bitch in less than two days.”
I burst out laughing. “You’re probably right,” I gasp out.
“The pretty ones never last long in Orange Is The New Black,” she deadpans. “Although, you have got a mean right hook. You can probably take that to the bank.”
I can barely contain myself now. I’m bent over at the waist in a fit of laughter. Hannah’s resolve finally breaks and she joins me. This is just one of those things you do with your best friend. Laugh uncontrollably, until the point of tears, even if what’s happening isn’t really that funny. It’s even worse if you’re somewhere that you aren’t supposed to talk or be loud. Then everything seems like it’s hilarious. For instance, one time, we tried to take hot yoga together. That did not go well. We ended up getting kicked out of the class for disrupting others. We decided then that yoga probably wasn’t our thing. That and people you don’t know who are dripping sweat all over the place. Not my cup of tea. That’s for damn sure.
We hear someone come through the front door and almost topple all over each other as we rush down the hallway to see Beth, only to find that it isn’t her.
“My girls. Always so excited to see me.” Jay grins, scooping us up in a bear hug.
“Watch it,” Greyson growls.
“You’re my best friend. I don’t want to remove your limbs, but I will if I have to,” Jami says from behind him.
“You too are so damn pussy-whipped.” Jay rolls his eyes and I punch him in the gut. “Oooof.”
“Oh yeah. Watch out for fight club over here.” Hannah laughs, and Jami joins in.
“Oh shut up, Hannah.” I glare at her before we all go sit in the living room.
Jay is still standing in the same place, gaping at all of us. “Does no one care that I was just physically assaulted?”
Jami drapes an arm over my shoulders. “Not really.” He kisses my cheek.
“I’m traumatized,” he says, flopping down onto the couch. “You break my heart, John. You break my heart.” He puts a dramatic hand over his heart and pouts.
When headlights pour into the living room, the tone immediately changes. Everyone’s nervous about meeting Beth’s new guy. It’s not that we aren’t happy for her, and if he’s great, we will support her of course. But something about the stories she tells us about him just seems off. We are all worried.
A few minutes later, the front door opens and we hear them walk up the stairs.
“Hey, guys,” Beth says, smiling at us. “This is Kyle.”