“Here, let me help.” I sat up and took a new tissue, dabbing at her face as I attempted to fix her makeup. The more I tried, the worse I seemed to make it, but it didn’t matter when I realized she was watching me with a look of wonder.
I froze, looking back into her big brown eyes, unable to move. Wow … she was so beautiful. I wished I could lean over and kiss her, but she was too vulnerable right now.
My thumbs replaced the tissue, wiping away new tears that leaked from her eyes. “What’s wrong?” I encouraged her to talk again, loving the feel of her silky skin beneath my fingers.
She stared at me for several moments, struggling with whatever was bothering her. “He attacked me. I’ve never told anyone about it.”
Ice ran through my veins at her words, and I leaned back. “He what?”
“I caught him with a girl in his car. We had a big fight, and he tried to tell me she was just a fling, that he had needs. I told him to get lost, and I broke up with him. He followed me home and burst into the house. He threw me on the couch and he … he … he would’ve succeeded if he hadn’t heard the bus pull up to drop off my little brother and sister. He threatened me—said if I ever told he would come back and make sure to finish what he started. Then he ran out.”
“Where were your parents?” I asked, floored with what she’d just revealed.
“My mom works. My dad died from cancer a few years ago.”
I silently kicked myself for adding to the burdens of this girl and the heartache she had been going through in her life.
“Nikki, I’m so sorry. You need to tell someone. This guy needs to pay for what he did to you. It’s illegal.”
“I won’t go through the humiliation of dealing with him again. I don’t even know why I told you. You were just being so nice, and all of a sudden I couldn’t hold it in anymore.”
I pulled her into my arms gently, hugging her. “I’m glad you told me. I promise, I won’t let him ever hurt you.”
She gave a half chuckle against my shoulder. “I wasn’t asking you to be my white knight or anything. I just needed to tell someone. Have you ever had something you wish you could talk to someone about, but it’s buried so deep you’re almost afraid to give it a voice?”
I stared her in the face and nodded. “Every day, as a matter of fact. I understand completely. I really do.”
“You don’t have to share anything personal with me, just because I did.” She stood and walked over to the table. “I guess we should get these packets made.”
I watched her as she started working again, quickly moving about her task. I didn’t want her to feel even more awkward around me now. That was exactly what would happen if I didn’t tell her something about me too.
“My dad was killed in a plane crash last year,” I said as I joined her.
She glanced at me briefly and continued to work without speaking. I did the same, letting the silence hang in the air between us.
“Is that when you started acting out?” she asked after a few moments.
I laughed wryly. “If that’s what you want to call it. I didn’t do it on purpose. I just wanted to stop feeling what I was feeling.”
“How bad was it?”
“Bad. I was willing to do or try anything to escape it—sleeping, drinking, partying … girls.”
“Drugs?” she asked point blank.
I sighed. “Yes, those too.”
“What kinds?”
“Mostly smoking marijuana, but there were a few pills here and there. I never used those enough to become addicted though.”
She turned to face me. “When was the last time you used?”
I swallowed hard, gritting my teeth. I didn’t want to answer her. I wasn’t sure how I’d started pouring my guts out to her, but I was pretty sure I needed to stop. I wasn’t ready for this dam to break.
I continued my work, not answering. To her credit, she didn’t try to press, but I still felt like a jerk after what she’d revealed to me.
“Last night,” I finally replied. I felt a little sick. I could go to jail if she told anyone about this.
She was quiet for a couple of minutes before she spoke. “You would probably get more benefit from being out there with the group than being stuck in here with me.”
I chuckled sarcastically. “You’re kidding, right? Nikki, you just got more out of me than I’ve been able to share with anyone in months. There’s no way I’m gonna go out there and blab about myself to some group. That’s not my style.”
“You might be surprised how much Maggie could help.”