“I’m sorry I haven’t seen you in the last couple of weeks. We made the arrest last night. I just have some paperwork to finish and there’s a press conference in . . .” Tyler glanced at his watch. Not much time left before his meeting with his boss, Agent Davies, about the press conference. “I’ve got twenty minutes to finish the reports and see my boss before he makes a statement to the press. Once that’s done, I can go home.”
He sighed and ran his fingers through his already disheveled hair. Exhausted, he hadn’t slept more than three or four hours a night for the past four days. He needed a decent meal and twelve straight hours of sleep. Either he saw Maria, or got some sleep. If he wanted to make a relationship work, he needed to work to make it a relationship.
“How about I pick you up in about two hours and I’ll take you out to dinner at Decadence at the Merrick Building. We’ll have a nice dinner and spend some time together.”
She let loose a happy squeal, telling him he’d made her happy enough to forgive him—this time.
“I’ll call you when I head out.”
Sam had this same conversation several times with women he’d dated. That is, until he’d met and married Elizabeth. One in a million, she understood his work and the long hours he put in. She never failed to surprise him. When he walked through the door, she’d kiss him like it might be the last time, and they’d share their time together like a precious gift. He’d almost lost her more than once, and they both knew his job was dangerous. The time they shared together was something neither of them took for granted. When he left for work, she respected his passion and dedication to his job. She’d worry, but he could count on that kiss and her love when he got home.
Listening to his partner talking to his latest girlfriend reminded him again how lucky he was. He hoped Tyler would find someone as special as Elizabeth, someone who understood the kind of man Tyler was and what it took to do a job that took his total focus and dedication.
“Yeah, the case will be on the news. I think it’s going national.” She congratulated him for solving the case and getting the recognition he deserved. He appreciated it, but corrected her assumption. “I work undercover. I won’t be on TV. I’ll call when I’m on my way to pick you up.”
They said their goodbyes and he smiled, anticipating spending the evening with her. Things between him and Maria seemed easy, uncomplicated. They’d enjoyed each other’s company for the last four months.
Right now, he didn’t know if it was for the moment or forever. Maybe he lacked that something that made women want to stick it out with him and make it work. He could even go so far as to say that the women he chose were just substitutes for the real woman he wanted. So far, he hadn’t found the staying kind.
It all came down to his job. Maybe it would forever keep him alone.
A whisper of Morgan’s haunting voice floated through his mind. You’re not alone.
Her voice, forever reminding him that she was with him, and yet nowhere near him. He asked her more times than he could count where she lived. A hundred other questions she either gave him vague answers to, or outright refused to answer. Like banging his head against the wall, trying to get any personal information from her only ended with a headache.
Any time he suggested they meet, or she should come to San Francisco, she always gave him the same cryptic reply, “It’s not time. Not yet.”
Not yet? What the hell was she waiting for?
Well, he’d gotten tired of that not yet and took it for what it probably meant: never.
He threw a pencil across his desk and went back to typing his reports, ignoring the ghost in his head and the bone-deep need to pull her closer. Or worse, answer that voice with another plea for her to come to him, only to be denied with another not yet. A man could only take so much rejection from the same woman.
Still, he needed her. Another thing he didn’t dare admit to that voice, her, or even himself most of the time.
Chapter Four
TYLER DIDN’T HAVE time to analyze the fact that he counted on that sultry voice at times like these when he was tired and feeling like life wasn’t going his way. Sometimes he actually truly believed she had a connection to his thoughts and feelings.
“Reed. Get your head out of your ass. We have a press conference in fifteen. Let’s break this case down to the facts for public consumption,” Agent Davies ordered.
Tyler shifted his thoughts back to the job at hand. His personal life could wait. That’s what he kept telling himself anyway. If he didn’t find some kind of balance between his personal life and the job soon, he’d burn out and have nothing waiting for him on the other side.