Niall still tried to feign innocence. “Have I? I was unaware.”
“Unaware, were ye? And I suppose ye were also ‘unaware’ Turcuil is the only guardsman assigned to Tomas when the weather is bad?”
Niall had the good grace to smile and look guilty.
“I thought so,” said Katherine smugly. “Well, sir, ye should realize even if ye toss the right ingredients into a pot and stir, it doesn’t become soup without adding some heat.”
Niall grinned, pulling her into his embrace, “I’ll give ye some heat, my impudent little matchmaker.”
Seventeen
By the end of November, winter’s icy grip firmly held Duncurra. Unusually cold, even for the Highlands, Katherine found fewer valid reasons for escaping the keep, thus having to tolerate Eithne’s company for longer periods of time. Even though Niall had clearly assigned all authority to Katherine, she still tried her best to be gracious and show Eithne a reasonable amount of respect. Some days she found the effort required to do this simply exhausting.
On one snowy afternoon after attending to all other tasks that could possibly keep her out of the great hall, Katherine finally had to tackle some needlework she had been avoiding. As she sat sewing by the hearth, she listened to Eithne criticize and complain for what seemed like hours. Katherine hadn’t been well for a couple of days. She felt more tired and less patient than usual. She could barely tolerate the forced confinement with her mother-in-law. As Eithne railed on at her, Katherine thought time spent with the unpleasant woman must surely rival purgatory. God must have given her this penance for some reason, but she couldn’t imagine what horrible sin she had committed to deserve it. Finally she stood up saying, “Pardon me, Eithne, I have to…go out.”
“In this storm? Why, of all the idiotic things to do.” But Katherine had already left the great hall before Eithne could say more. Not taking time to fetch a heavy mantle, she pulled her airisaidh over her head, stepping outside the front doors of the keep. The snow fell heavily, blown by the biting wind, which easily penetrated her woolen garments. In her haste to leave she forgot to inform a guardsman of her destination. She had no real idea where she was going anyway.
She stood on the steps for a moment, looking around, and her eyes landed on the chapel just across the courtyard. Perhaps she would find the peace she sought in the stillness there. She crossed the courtyard and slipped inside the little building, shutting the door behind her. With no fire to warm it, Katherine could see her breath in the frigid air, but without the biting wind she could tolerate the cold.
Sitting on one of the benches in the sparsely furnished chapel, she took a deep breath, inhaling the faint aroma of beeswax and incense that seemed to linger in every church. The tension she couldn’t seem to escape in Eithne’s presence slipped away, leaving her feeling calmer than she had in days. She missed this. She prayed quietly for a while. When she reached the end of her litany she simply sat in the stillness, savoring the tranquility. She felt a holiness in simply being still that she couldn’t quite explain, but of all days, today she needed the sacred silence. She wasn’t sure how long she sat there, but a commotion outside drew her from her contemplation and she went to see what was amiss.
“There she is,” she heard Turcuil call, and she saw her husband striding towards her.
“I thought ye were lost. Why didn’t ye tell anyone where ye were going? Eithne said ye went out into the storm hours ago.” Niall was cross but his voice held a note of fear.
“Well, that is a gross exaggeration,” Katherine said, “and I didn’t tell anybody because when I left the keep I didn’t know where I was going. I just needed to escape and find a few moments of peace, but I am sorry I worried you.”
“Ye are freezing,” he said, and scooping her up, carried her across the snowy courtyard, into the keep, straight upstairs to their chamber. He stoked the fire in the hearth and asked, “If ye needed quiet, why didn’t ye just come up here where it was warm?” He still sounded cross with her.
“There is a difference between quiet and peace. I have been tired and irritable lately. I used to go to Mass every day and I thought maybe a few minutes in the peaceful stillness of the chapel would help. That is the only thing I have ever missed about Cotharach.”
He considered her a moment. “Would ye like to have a priest here, Katherine?”
“You mean a resident priest like Father James, not just an itinerant? Is that possible?”
“It can be arranged. Since ye are the reason we have adequate resources, the least I can do is give ye is a priest if that is what ye want.”