“I know,” she whispered.
That spark of hope he’d had earlier on the porch grew stronger at her quiet confession—apparently she’d been battling the same war. Jake took another step into the room, then another.
“Tell me you’re ready to give up,” he told her, damning the tears that threatened to clog his throat. “Tell me the thought of living without what we have is more appealing than fighting for us.”
He didn’t miss the way her fingers curled into the sheets on the edge of the bed, nor did he miss her shaky intake of breath.
Her silence was invitation enough to move closer, so close he knelt in front of her, taking her hands and holding them in her lap.
“Tell me that I’ve got no chance with you,” he went on. “Because I won’t give up on us as long as there’s hope. I have to believe you’re not ready to give up or you would’ve left here before now.”
Lily’s chocolate eyes filled as she bit her unpainted bottom lip. “I can’t tell you that.”
Relief flooded him, but he was still not in the clear.
“I know we have a lot to work through,” he continued. “I know I deserve nothing, but I’m asking for everything. I want you in my life, Lily. I want us to be a family. I don’t care if I have to live in LA part of the time and we can come here to get away. You call the shots here.”
“I’m scared, Jake. I’ve never loved like this before, never been so hurt because of it.”
Easing forward even more, he let her hands go and wrapped his arms around her waist as he looked up into her teary eyes. “I’ve never loved like this before, either. That’s no excuse for hurting you the way I did, but I can swear on my life that I’ll never hurt you again. I want a lifetime to love you, Lily. I want forever to be the man you deserve and the father our children deserve.”
She threaded her fingers through his hair. “I’m risking everything by letting you back in.”
“My heart is on the line, too,” he told her. “If you walked out again it would kill me. I love you, Lily. I know when I said it before the timing couldn’t have been worse. But I love you so much I ache when you’re not with me.”
The smile that spread across her face had tears gliding down over her cheeks. “I love you, too, Jake.”
Every bit of tension and fear left his body as he leaned his head forward, resting it against their baby. Lily’s fingertips caressed the back of his neck as he breathed in her familiar scent.
“I won’t keep anything from you again,” he murmured as he lifted his head.
“I know. You’ve shown me the man you are. I want to give us another chance.” She stared into his eyes, and his heart swelled with love at the light shining back. “I do have one stipulation, though.”
“What’s that?”
Her hands framed his face, stroked his jaw. “Maybe a little scruff? I fell in love with a rugged man who turned my insides out that first night in the loft. Maybe you could not shave for a while?”
Jake laughed. “Anything you want. Besides, I’ll be too busy to shave.”
“Oh, really?” Lily lifted her brows. “And what will you be doing?”