Not that he looked bad. The Nash with the beard and unkempt hair was rugged and mysterious. This Nash with the square jaw and chiseled cheeks, with more emphasis on those mesmerizing eyes was flat-out sexy and intriguing.
“I needed to,” he told her, taking her hands in his. He kissed her palms before placing her hands on his chest. “It’s the first step in getting where I need to be, where we need to be.”
Lily couldn’t stop taking in the sight of him. Who knew a dark beard and disheveled hair could change someone’s appearance so much?
Those worry lines between his brows had deepened and the haunted look in his eyes hadn’t been there when she’d left.
“Something’s wrong.” The feel of his quickened heartbeat beneath her hand confirmed her suspicions. “Talk to me.”
Releasing her hands, he slid his own around her waist and pulled her against him. When he froze and jerked his gaze down, Lily smiled.
“I grew a little,” she explained, lifting her oversize T-shirt to expose her slightly rounded belly. “One morning I just woke up and there it was.”
She wondered how he’d react to her new shape, but when both of his hands came around to cover the swell, Lily knew he was just as excited about their growing baby as she was.
Nash dropped to his knees, laying his forehead against her stomach as his thumbs stroked her bare skin. The thought that this child could already bring such a strong man to his knees was so sexy.
Lily threaded her fingers through his much shorter hair. “I’ve missed you so much,” she whispered.
The first rumble of thunder shook the house, rain pelted the windows harder now. Nash glanced up at her, a storm of his own flashing through his expressive eyes as he came back to his feet and gathered her against him.
He tilted his face against her neck, his lips tickling her skin and sending jolts of need streaming through her...as if she needed any more encouragement to want this man.
“I’ve needed this,” he murmured. “Needed you.”
Lily wrapped her arms around his bare waist. “You’ll always have me, Nash. I’m in this forever, but you keep holding back. When will you open up and let me in? Finally see that what we have only gets stronger each day?”
Nash pulled back, and lightning flashed through the window, illuminating his handsome, yet troubled face. “I’ve always known how strong we are, Lily. I’ve never doubted it, never once thought what we had wasn’t real. I didn’t want to admit it at first because I knew you’d be leaving and I was going to have to say goodbye, so I was protecting myself. But you mattered to me the second I made you mine up in that loft.”
Her body trembled at the memory even though she had a sinking feeling there was more to what he had to say.
“You’re right, I’ve been holding back.” He stepped away, raking a hand down his smooth jaw. “I never intended for you to get caught in this war I made with myself. I figured once you were gone and we parted ways you’d never have to know.”
Chills crept up her spine. What was he about to confess? Was he married? Did he already have children somewhere? Was he dying? The endless questions swirled around in her head until she thought she’d pass out.
Gripping the back of the sofa, Lily met his gaze head-on. She wasn’t about to cower now. Whatever he was on the verge of telling her obviously was tearing him up, too. If they were going to be a couple, they needed to face the crisis together.