Taking the scalpel, I look down at his chest.
This isn’t Marcus.
This is a patient.
He’s a patient.
I take a deep breath and make the skin incision, and cut through the layers of soft tissue. I open the sternum with a saw and cauterize arterial bleeding points on the underside of the sternum to minimize blood loss. We use sternal retractors to maximize exposure, and the second I see the beating heart, I take a deep breath and allow my mind to take over.
∞∞∞
JAXSON
I sit in the waiting room, and I’m about to start chewing my nails when Ryan walks in.
“Sebastian called and said you might need some company.” He hands me a cup of coffee and sits down next to me.
“Thanks. I just wish I knew how it was going.”
“I don’t know much, but I’m sure he’s going to be okay.”
“I hope so,” I whisper.
My phone rings and when I see Carter’s name flashing on the screen, I answer.
“Hey.”
“How are you holding up?”
“I don’t know. I keep going from hopeful to scared out of my fucking mind.”
“We’re just about to land. We’ll be there soon.”
“Hurry,” I squeeze the word out.
Ending the call, my shoulders slump. I need my friends here.
The two people who mean the most to me in the world are in that operating room, and I’m scared that only one will walk out of there.
Ryan places a hand on my back, and that’s all it takes for me to start crying. The worry is too intense. I can’t breathe past it.
Chapter 14
JAXSON
Having Ryan sit with me is helping a lot. Ryan is married to Sebastian, and knowing that Sebastian is holding Marcus’ hand right this second, makes it feel like I’m there with them.
“Why couldn’t we see him before surgery?”
Hearing Mia’s voice makes my head snap up. Seconds later the whole crew comes barreling into the waiting room.
“That’s what Marcus wanted. You’ll see him when he’s out of surgery,” Logan patiently explains.
“Hey guys,” I say to everyone in general.
“How is he?” Rhett asks
“Is there any news?” Carter asks a second later.
Ryan holds up a hand to stop any further question.
“We’re still waiting. It’s too soon for any news.” He reaches a hand out to Carter. “Ryan Ward. I’m Sebastian’s husband.”
“Carter Hayes. Sorry, but who’s Sebastian?” he asks, as he shakes Ryan’s hand.
“He’s a nurse here. He’s currently with Marcus. He’ll let us know the second they have an update.”
“Thank you,” Carter says, as he takes a seat next to Ryan.
Mia sits down next to me and gives me a hug.
“How are you doing?” she whispers.
I shake my head and let out a breath.
Wrapping her arm around my waist, she rests her cheek against my arm.
I’m surprised when Della and Danny walk into the waiting room. I didn’t know they were coming.
Danny smiles as she walks straight to me. She wiggles her way onto my lap and gives me a big sloppy kiss.
“Why do you look so sad, Uncle Jax?”
I drop my eyes from hers and whisper, “My heart is just a little broken.”
She places her hand over my heart, as her bottom lip starts to tremble.
“Don’t cry, Uncle Jax,” she whispers.
I try to blink the tears away and suck in a deep breath of air, but then Danny scrambles to her knees, and she wraps her tiny arms around my neck.
“It’s okay,” she whispers, as she pats my back. Her tiny hand starts to caress my hair, and I lose it.
“It’s okay,” she keeps whispering as she comforts me. “Just don’t get snot on me, okay? I’ll ask Mommy for a tissue if you need one.”
I laugh and cry at the same time at her words, and I have to admit, I feel a little better.
When I manage to control my emotions, Danny pulls back. She takes hold of her shirt and tries to see if I got snot on her. Della hands her a tissue, and she gets busy wiping the tears from my face.
“You’re lucky, Uncle Jax. You don’t have snot. When I cry, my snot runs all over the place. It just keeps coming and coming and coming.” When she’s done, she smiles brightly. “There, now you’re all better.”
“Yeah, Princess,” I say as I press a kiss to the top of her head. “You fixed my heart.”
After a few minutes, Danny crawls off my lap and gets onto Carter’s. It doesn’t take her long to fall asleep in his arms.
The room is quiet as we all sit and wait. Every time I look at my watch only ten seconds has passed.
The door opens and Sebastian comes in. He freezes, and his eyes scan the room.
“Oh my, there’s so much testosterone in this room my poor ovaries are going to combust.”
“You don’t have ovaries,” Ryan says as he gets up.
“My imaginary ones. I think we should swap places. I’ll comfort the hunks, and you go hold Marcus’ hand.”
“Sebastian,” I say, ready to have a nervous breakdown. “How is he?”
“Oh, yes!” He finally remembers why he came here. “Marcus is doing well. I have to get back. Too-de-loo.” He wiggles his fingers in a wave and disappears out the door.
“What the hell just happened?” Rhett asks with his eyes still on the door.
“My husband is a scatter-brain. All that matters is that Marcus is doing well,” Ryan says as he sits down next to me again.
He places a hand on my back and locks eyes with me.
“Marcus is doing well, Jaxson.”
“He is,” I whisper as it sinks in. “Thank God.”
“Is he allowed to wear lipstick to work?” Rhett asks.
I shake my head. I know it’s coming from a good place, but Ryan might not think so.
“Sure. It’s the same as any other female wearing lipstick to work.”
Rhett nods. “True, I didn’t think of it that way.”
I can see another question coming, and I let out a groan.
“How do you kiss?”
“Fuck, Rhett,” I groan, dropping my face into my hands.
“No, I don’t it mean like that. It’s just whenever I have to kiss a woman, and she’s wearing lipstick, I end up with most of it smeared over my face. None of your women wear lipstick so I thought I’d ask Ryan.”
Ryan chuckles, and I’m just thankful he’s amused with Rhett.
“That’s why you take them to dinner. If they eat first, you won’t have a lipstick problem.”
Rhett opens his mouth, but Ryan holds up a finger to stop him. He leans over me and whispers to Rhett.
“If you want to skip dinner, just let them blow you. It gets rid of the lipstick, and you score.”
Ryan quickly glances back at Danny to make sure she’s still sleeping.
Rhett looks impressed with the answer as he sits and thinks about it.
“Yeah, I like option number two better.”
“Eww… I’m right here,” Mia hisses. “Ugh, I’m scarred for life.”
Logan starts to laugh but at once tries to swallow it when Mia glares at him.
Della is staring at the room while her face is turning red from keeping in the laughter.
Carter lowers his head, and his whole body starts to shake Danny as he silently laughs.
The next second we all burst out laughing. It relieves a lot of the tension.
I give Ryan a thankful smile as he leans into me.
“You’re welcome.”
∞∞∞
LEIGH
Every time I walk down this hallway, my stomach knots.
I take a deep breath as I fight the tears. Normally, I wouldn’t be affected by something like this, but because it’s Marcus, I can’t help but feel.
He was high-risk, just like Mom.
When I get to the door, I close my eyes as I try to control my emotions.
I need to be professional. I’m a doctor. I can’t cry.
I feel a hand on my shoulder, and when I glance behind me, I see that it’s Dr. Magliato.
“Would you like me to speak to the family?”
As the first tear rolls down my cheek, I nod. There’s no way I’ll be able to stop crying once I see Jaxson.
“Please,” I whisper as I step to the side so she can go in first.
When she opens the door, I follow her into the waiting room.
Everyone is here. Jaxson is the first to stand, and his eyes find mine. My tears come faster, and I cover my mouth.
The blood drains from his face, and I want to tell him it’s okay, but I can’t get any words out.
“Mr. Reed’s surgery was a success. There was a minor complication, which Dr. Baxter handled with great care. The patient is in recovery right now. I suggest you all go home and get some rest. You’ll be able to see him tomorrow.”
“Thank you, Doctor,” Carter says with great relief as he shakes her hand.
Knowing that they need this moment to celebrate that Marcus survived the surgery, I leave the room and rush to the elevators. When the doors open, I quickly step inside and repeatedly press the button for the doors to close. I watch as Jaxson walks into the hallway and our eyes meet for a split-second before the doors shut in front of me.
The cab driver keeps giving me looks filled with pity as he drives to the address I gave him. When he stops outside the house, I pay him.
I rush up the stairs to the front door and bang my first on the wood until he opens.