I’d been willing to play the game by the rules, but whose rules were those? I wasn’t about to live my life according to the things he’d set in play. Fuck that.
"You're not leaving me, not now not ever, no one's gonna hurt you here baby, look at me. I will never let anything happen to you.”
The look on her face said she wasn’t buying it and all I kept hearing was her telling me in her sweet voice that she was damaged goods.
“I'm willing to love you Amanda but you gotta start loving yourself, you can't let that fucker win, why would you let him win?
Who the fuck is he that his words are more powerful than anyone else's? What has he ever done that's so great that you have to take his word?
Did you always believe you were nothing or did the great Lance Woods teach you that shit?" She was crying but at least she'd stopped trying to evade me.
"Tell me something, before this saintly hero of mankind tore you down, who were you? What did you want out of life, what did you think of yourself?" I was talking fast and probably not making a lick of sense, but I had to get it all out.
I heard the others slowing down as they drew near, but I didn't turn around, I kept my eyes on her.
"Don't you think I deserve the chance to meet that girl? In your note you thanked me, well I don't want your words Amanda, words are empty without actions. Thank me by getting back in that truck and coming home with me. Thank me by showing me that you're worth it. Do you remember our kisses in the wildflowers Amanda?"
Good, I got a nod.
"Wasn't that beautiful? What was wrong with that?"
"Nothing, it was perfect." She whispered the words like a prayer.
Oh thank you. That was all I needed to move in just a little bit closer.
"Don't you want to have more of that? Don't you want to walk with me down by the stream in the spring when it's really beautiful?"
"But it's beautiful now." She took a step towards me, keep coming baby, just keep coming, I've got you. My heart was beating so fast and hard I don't know how I was getting the words out.
"Pffffttt, that's nothing, it's almost the end of summer. If you really want to see beauty you should see it in the spring when everything's new, or in the winter when the water freezes over and there's snow covering everything. I'm sure Nathan would fix up the old sleigh and we could go for rides."
She stepped a little closer and I fought myself not to move, to let her come to me.
"You have a sleigh?"
"Yep, a great big old fashioned one, we'll camp out in the snow and roast marshmallows."
She wrinkled her nose at me.
"I don't know about camping in the snow, sounds cold and wet to me."
"Okay fine be that way. I guess I can go camping with Mikey but he just bitches and moans the whole time."
She laughed, sweet heaven she laughed.
"What if I never get better?"
She spoke so softly I had to bend down to hear her. She breaks my fucking heart.
I finally allowed myself to touch her, and pulling her in close, kissed her forehead before whispering in her ear.
"You will I'm sure of it, we'll take it one day at a time. Now let's head back, it's hot as hell out here."
"Okay, I guess I better get dinner started anyway, I've wasted half the day already."
"You don't have to worry about dinner I've go it covered."
She almost choked on her laughter.
"What's so funny?" I stopped walking and looked down at her ravishing face under my arm, and stole a quick kiss, before opening the truck door.
I helped her climb up and buckled her in. "No offense but the guys kinda told me about your cooking. If you don't mind I think I'll take care of it."
"What the hell did those liars tell you? I'm a master cook, I can rustle up a mean rattle stew."
"Eww, gross." She turned up her nose at me.
"Have you ever had it?" She shook her head no.
"So how do you know?"
"I don't, it just sounds gross."
"You're right, it does but it might be fun to try. Maybe we can send Mikey after one, maybe it'll bite him and he can stop working my damn nerves"
She was freely laughing now and I felt the tight constriction around my chest ease.
Closing her door I signaled the guys as I walked around to my side. Engines turned over as they all headed back down the drive, crisis averted.
Chapter 14
AMANDA
I feel like such an idiot for making such a fuss. Now everyone’s walking around on eggshells, and Caleb is stuck to my side like he’s afraid that I’d run off again.
“Caleb I can peel these, go on outside and do whatever you’re supposed to be doing.”
“Nope, I’m not needed out there.” He peeled one more potato before dropping it in the water, but he couldn’t quite hide the sigh that escaped him.