Cabin Fever(5)

 

“Oh, no, this is your baby’s room, I can’t stay here.”

 

“Not yet it’s not. But don’t worry, Cassie doesn’t mind sharing.” She puts the baby in the crib, sitting her down in the center of it. “Keep an eye on her for me while I put the kettle on, would you? We can have some tea while we catch up.” She leaves the room before I have time to reply.

 

The baby watches her go, her expression going concerned.

 

Worried she’s going to start crying, I leave my bags on the bed and grab a stuffed animal off the shelf, shaking at her a little as I approach. “Look! It’s an elephant.”

 

She stops frowning and stares at me, her big blue eyes fringed with dark lashes so thick they look almost fake. Her hair is blonde and curls around her head in gentle waves. She reaches for the animal and pulls it away from me, never taking her eyes off mine. She’s suspicious of my motives, I can tell. I don’t have much experience with babies, but this particular girl is very expressive.

 

“Don’t worry. I’m not here to cause any trouble. I won’t take your room from you. It’s only temporary.”

 

Hearing myself say it, I realize how true it is. I can’t paint here. This place is pristine, and I highly doubt this condo has a room with enough light for me to work in. And even if they did have one, I can’t imagine they’d want me in there with my acrylics. Imagining myself in a corner of Leah’s studio apartment was fine, but here? No. It just feels wrong. Intrusive.

 

I hate that I’m already chickening out on my plan. It’s so depressing to think I’m back to square one without a clear future in sight. Leah was my last hope.

 

“Tea’s on!” says Leah from the other room. “Could you bring Cassie with you?”

 

Lifting the baby from the crib, I smile to keep the little girl from worrying again. She looks so serious as she descends to my hip, still holding the elephant against her.

 

“Don’t worry, it’s just me. I’m Sarah. I won’t hurt you. I love babies.”

 

Cassie shoves the elephant up into my face, squishing my nose sideways.

 

“Oh, thank you.” I lean away from it so I can see my way into the other room.

 

She keeps pushing. By the time I’m in the kitchen at the small table set with tea and cookies, I’m halfway to doing a backbend.

 

“Cassie, stop that,” Leah says, taking the elephant out of my face. “Sharing is nice, but over-sharing isn’t. Remember? I told you that already about fifty times.”

 

Cassie nearly does a head dive trying to retrieve the elephant from Leah’s hands. I hold onto her with an iron grip when I feel her slipping out of my arms.

 

“In the highchair first,” Leah says, talking to Cassie, “then the elephant. Come on.” She takes the baby from me and puts her in the chair, trapping her in with a clipped-on tray. “There we go,” she says, breathing out a sigh of relief. Her gaze shifts to me. “Have a seat and we can chat while we stuff ourselves with cookies.”

 

I lower myself into the seat opposite her. Cassie is between us, to my left. Leah spills a few Cheerios on the baby’s tray and then busies herself with pouring us tea out of a gorgeous teapot that has a ceramic bird on top of it. She’s too busy to notice me staring at her clothing.

 

Never have I seen Leah looking so sharp, so put together, so … so … rich. There’s no other word for it. That outfit had to cost more than her old studio rent.

 

“So, what brings you to Manhattan?” she asks, winking at me.

 

It’s not cold in here, but I feel like I’m about to start shaking. I squeeze my hands together between my legs, the denim seams pressing into my skin. “Change. A need for change, I guess you could say.”

 

“You were living in the city before, right? Down there in Boston? That doesn’t sound like much of a change.”

 

“Yeah, I was, but … yeah.” I sigh. Not having a plan sounded bold and exciting a few weeks ago. Now it just feels irresponsible and stupid.

 

“At loose ends, is that it?” She sits down and takes a cookie from the plate in front of us. “I know how you feel.”

 

My eyebrows go up. “You’re at loose ends?”

 

“No, not now. But I was.” She grins.

 

The happiness evident in that grin finally calms me down. Who cares about my life? I want to know about hers.

 

“So what’s the deal, woman?” I ask. “Last time I saw you, you were living in a hole in the wall, barely making ends meet.”