Jenny looked at the picture, and Sam watched Jenny, and he couldn’t help it. He pictured her with a ginger-haired, brown-eyed baby on her lap, looking back at him.
Knowing what he knew of her, she would make a wonderful mother someday. Warm, loving, honest, firm. And they’d be good kids with a mother like Jenny. His gut twisted as he thought about the lucky man who’d make Jenny his wife. Paul’s handsome face entered Sam’s mind, and he swallowed against the physical discomfort he felt imagining Jenny with Paul instead of him. He thought back to Paul’s words: “I’ll help her pick up the pieces.”
Like hell you will. I will figure this out. I will.
She handed the phone back to Sam, beaming. “He’s lovely.”
Sam nodded, forcing thoughts of Jenny with Paul out of his mind. “You want kids?”
“Someday.” She looked down, and a pretty blush colored her cheeks. “Of course I do. What would be better than that? A husband who loves me and a baby or two?” She smiled at him. “Someday.”
“And in the meantime?”
“Work. Casey. Get married to handsome strangers. You know, the usual.”
He chuckled, raising his eyebrows. “Handsome?”
She shrugged and the blush deepened, but she faced him with a shy smile, biting her lower lip. Damn, he wanted to kiss her again. “Yes. Handsome.”
She looked away, then stood up and excused herself to go to the restroom, stopping to chat with Lars on her way.
Jenny, Jenny, Jenny, you have no idea what you’re doing to me.
He thought about their conversation on the bridge when his hopes for her to come to Chicago had taken a hit. She had been very clear. Her life was in Gardiner and that’s where she wanted to stay. He breathed deeply and sighed, because he couldn’t possibly consider Gardiner for himself. There simply wasn’t any opportunity for him here. Frankly, Gardiner was charming for a weekend stopover, but that was about all. He would still ask her about Chicago, but tomorrow or Monday. Not tonight. He didn’t want to spoil tonight. It could wait.
The waitress came by with their burgers and Sam sat back, waiting for Jenny. He took a big sip of beer.
He had wanted to kiss her so badly on the bridge, hold her and comfort her after she told him about her mother. But it was a stupid thing to suggest. Jenny was no Pepper, who used any public opportunity to make out, more for her image than because she genuinely cared for Sam. “Hot Pepper” was one of her favorite magazine captions, and faking surprise when the cameras caught her with her tongue in Sam’s mouth was one of her favorite ways to procure it. Going back to Chicago, back to girls like Pepper, sat like lead in his stomach.
His mind wandered to what Jenny had said about kids, how she wanted a husband who loved her and kids of her own someday. All the time he’d been with Pepper, any dreams of marriage and kids had been strictly kept at bay; it wasn’t an option for him to imagine himself with Pepper for the long-term. And yet, after knowing Jenny for only two days, he couldn’t help but think of her holding a red-headed baby in her arms. Red-headed like him.
Jenny returned and smiled at him as she sat down. Sam took a shaky breath, concealing his internal dialogue behind a big gulp of beer.
“Tree lighting in an hour,” she said, taking a big bite of burger.
“Near the arch, right?”
“Uh-huh. There’s a big old evergreen there that they keep roped with lights all year. Goes on after the Christmas Stroll, and off on New Year’s Day. Then Christmas is over.”
“What do you do for Christmas?” Sam asked. They’d be far away from each other by then, but he could think of her, imagine her Christmas Day.
“We’ll have a Julebord at church, a pre-Christmas party. Usually it’s the second or third Sunday of Advent and it’s great. We have a big potluck dinner, make Christmas wreaths, the children sing carols, and we bring toys to donate to needy kids. I love it. I help with the Christmas pageant, too. I used to love the symphony in Great Falls. They always had some special concert at Christmastime. Maybe I’ll head up there for one of their concerts, too. Sometimes I can get Erik to go with me, or Maggie from the Prairie Dawn.” She shrugged. “Paul asked me to help with…”
She bit her bottom lip, flicking her glance at Sam and then down at her burger.
If she keeps biting her bottom lip, I’m kissing it in front of her brother and I don’t care if he leaps over the bar and slams his fist in my face. It’ll be worth it.
“Go on,” Sam encouraged her. At the mention of Paul something uncomfortable and sharp stabbed at him, but he smiled at Jenny.