"I love you, Nora, and I will show it to you. You'll be so sick of love by the time I'm through." He moved toward her, gripping her arms. "Please, give me this chance. Come back home."
She was breaking. He saw it. She was going to cave.
"I'll come home. I will, but I'm not going to work for you. I'll take up Frank's offer, but I'll be working with him, or whoever he puts me with."
He didn't like that, but he knew he had to do something to keep her in his life.
Chapter Ten
Christmas didn't go exactly how Nora had hoped. She didn't stay at Rex's place, and other than swapping gifts, she didn't see him. He wanted to, but she just couldn't bring herself to be with him.
She didn't know what to think about what had happened over the past week. Fortunately, the firm had given them all a two weeks' vacation for Christmas and the New Year. She didn't have to face going back to the office or deal with questions. The day after Christmas, Rex decided to pay a visit.
He held a bunch of red roses and held his hands up in surrender. "I'm not here to fight. Please, I just want to talk, to spend time with you."
Nora stared at his jeans and plain black shirt. It seemed strange to her to see him out of a suit.
Opening the door, she stepped back, and gave him room to enter. He closed the door behind him, and stared at her.
"You look beautiful," he said.
She burst out laughing. "No, I don't. I look like crap." She wore baggy pajama pants, and a shirt that looked like she had spilt her lemon tea on.
"I never wanted to hurt you," he said. "I want to be there for you, and for the baby."
Licking her lips, she turned toward her apartment. "I've hated you for so long. I didn't think it was even possible to like you. Then something changed, you changed, and I started to wonder. Is it even possible to love you? Does it make me weak because of how I feel about you?"
"I wasn't the best guy for you to work for. I can't make excuses for my behavior."
"I deleted a lot of the messages you sent. I didn't want to read them all or listen to them all. What did you say?" she asked.
"Pretty much the same stuff only said in different ways. I said how much I love you." She laughed. "I know you don't believe that, and I get it. I was too late in telling you how much I feel about you. That this is love for me."
"What do you want, Rex? I mean seriously? Me being pregnant. Are you even happy about that? Was it just one big mistake?"
"No." He took a step toward her, and she couldn't help but take a step back. When she was around him it was near impossible for her to think. Right now, she needed her wits about her, and not to be thinking about what they could have had. "I want you to trust me."
"Trust is earned, Rex. The way you spoke to me, the way you made me feel, you hurt me."
"I didn't want to hurt you. With Carl-"
She held her hand up. "I get it. I do. You were angry at him, and you took it out on me. Believe me, I get it. Just tell me what you want?"
He stared at her for a long time. She saw the pain in his gaze, and it hurt her so much to see that she was causing it. It would be so much easier if she could just run into his arms and all was forgiven. The world didn't work that way, and neither did she.
Part of her wanted to make him pay for being so mean to her. She hadn't been mean to him, and she was tired of him hurting her, even if he didn't mean to. Another part of her was just tired, and didn't want to give in to him. He had hurt her, and said stuff that really didn't need to be said. Why should he be allowed to have everything his heart desired, hurting her in the process?
"I want us, Nora. I want us to be together. I want to raise our family together." He didn't move forward, but he held his hand out toward her stomach. "I don't regret being with you. What I regret is waiting so long to claim you. You've always been mine. From the moment I first saw you, I knew, and yet you were so young, and compared to you I'm so fucking old. I shouldn't have had the dirty thoughts that I do about you, or even wanted to start a life with you, but I do. I want it so badly. Every single day, I want it. Being with you, it was like you gave me a taster of what I could have. I want it all the time. I want to come home with you, eat dinner, watch television, talk, make love, fuck. I want to grow old, and have a family with you, kids, the entire works. That is what I want with you. I'm laying all my cards on the table."
She wrapped her arms around herself, knowing that if he'd said this before that damn Christmas party, she would have caved. She wouldn't have gone to her parents', nor would she be spending most of her nights crying.
"You hurt me."
"I know, and I'm so sorry. I will do everything I can to make it up to you." He took a step toward her, and this time she didn't move back.
Instead, she took a step toward him. Gripping his black shirt, she rested her head against his chest. "I'm so scared."
"You don't need to be scared. I'm going to be here every step of the way." His hands surrounded her, providing her the comfort she needed.
Closing her eyes, she allowed the warmth of his embrace to enfold her. She wanted to give in, she really did. They had such a good thing going, but she was afraid to. What if they were not meant to be?
"I'm going to prove it to you." He cupped her face, making her look at him. "I want this. Let me prove it to you, please."
She felt even worse that he was going to try to change, and be something he wasn't. "You don't have to-"
"Don't do that, Nora. Don't give me an out. I didn't have any right to talk to you that way, or to treat you like shit. There is no right or wrong way I should have been. That is my bad, and I'm going to make it up to you." He pressed his lips against hers. "It's what I've got to do."
Nora saw that it meant a lot of him, and she didn't get it. Not really. He wanted them to be together, and even though he had hurt her, it wasn't all that bad. It wasn't like he cheated on her, or made her do something she hated.
She had loved being with him, spending time, and getting to know the real him.
"Can I ask you a question?" she asked.
"Yes. You can ask me anything." His thumb stroked across her cheek, and it was messing with her head right now.
"Which was real? The guy you've been for the past couple of weeks, or the guy that's an asshole? I don't know who is real, and who is not."
"I'm real. The guy I've been with you. That's real to me, okay? You and me, laughing, talking, just being together. I've never had that with anyone else before, and I don't want to not have it with you. I will fight us for it. I won't screw this up again."
She believed him.
"You kept the dog?" Rex asked.
"Of course I kept the dog. Besides the fact you told me to, I wasn't going to give him away," Alaric said.
They were sitting in a coffee shop enjoying a freshly brewed coffee and Rex had ordered a scone. He wanted to see if they were nicer than the ones that Nora had made yesterday at the office.
"Where is the dog?" Rex asked, wrinkling his nose at the dry, stale scone. Nope, Nora had ruined his appetite for anything sweet that wasn't made by her. He didn't mind, it was just another thing to love about her.
"He's at home right now."
"So what exactly happened?" Rex asked. His best friend, Alaric, was intent on getting revenge on a rival businessman. The revenge was for Alaric to sleep with the guy's daughter, and get her to fall in love with him. Not only did all of those things happen, but Alaric fell in love with her as well, screwing with all of his carefully ordered plans. Anyway, before Alaric could come clean and admit to it, Bella found out the truth, and in fact it was Rex that had taken her to see Alaric in his office. Good times … not. While Alaric had his drama, Rex had his own.
"So, you see that is what happened, and she's giving me a chance. Or at least, her father is helping me to not screw up. What about you and your chubby little PA?"
"Nora's not chubby."
"So you do have feelings for her?" Alaric asked, taking a sip of his coffee. "I always knew you did. You were always complaining about her, but I don't know, something didn't seem right."
"I love her, Alaric, and she's pregnant with my kid."
Alaric choked on his coffee, and started to cough. "Wait, what?"
"That's right. I knocked up my PA at the same time you were trying to win over Bella. We both fucked up."
"Wait, I fucked up because I lied about who I was. How did you? She knew who you were? What did you have to hide?"
"I had nothing to hide. In fact everything between the two of us was going great," Rex said.
"What was the problem?"
"I said some things to her. I was mean, and I was angry. I was also terrified, but I didn't realize that until much later. I said some things that I shouldn't have." He didn't mention anything about her being a virgin, or that she hadn't thought about protection. They had both made mistakes, and what surprised him was that Nora had owned up to her own. He couldn't have her being the only adult in their relationship. He had his faults as well. He was over twenty years her senior. He should have known. The problem he had was that he finally got to claim her as his own. Nora was his weakness, and he saw that now more than ever.