Of course, you only turned one once. Plus, his goddaughter, Aoife Jordan deserved it. She had a rough start in life. Found in the woods abandoned, malnourished, and helpless, she'd stolen her father Enzo's heart. The man had come to the Wild Ones to doctor paperwork and officially make the blue-eyed baby his. Now, Snake couldn't imagine life without his tiny sweetheart. She helped ease the ache that came from losing Jocelyn.
It ate him up, not being able to bury his baby girl because they'd never found a body. What little was left of his wife had told them the assailants used an accelerant to destroy the evidence. The Sheriff had told him as small as his daughter was, there would be nothing left to find. It never sat right with him. They wanted to make him hurt. Nothing would do that more than having his daughter's body show up at a later date. For months after, he'd expected to step out and find her remains in his car, or on his temporary property. Every phone call made him hold his breath. Years later, he was still waiting for that call. There was a lack of closure available. He needed to know what had happened to her and where her remains lie. It was past time he brought his baby girl home and laid her to rest.
"Nake," Aoife babbled. Her sweet voice helped him push the darkness away. Today of all days, he wouldn't live in the past.
"Brother, I can't even begin to express how out of place you look in this joint," Enzo remarked, coming up behind him with his arm wrapped around his wife.
"Yeah, yeah. Keep it up and I won't help you set up for these little monster," Snake said playfully.
"Thank you for coming early," Enzo's wife, Aibhlinn, said.
"Anything for my best girls," Snake remarked.
She grinned, and he was nearly blinded by her glowing skin and brilliant white teeth. They stepped inside the toddler room they'd rented out for the next hour, and shrugged out of their coats.
"Holy shit, Aib, you popped," he exclaimed, taking in her small belly.
"I know! I went to sleep last night, woke up, and there he was proud and prominent."
"Like his Da," Enzo teased, impersonating her Irish brogue.
"Aye, like his Da. I'm in trouble for sure." Shaking her head ruefully, she released a light moan.
Snake snickered. "Should've thought about that beforehand, Irish."
She shrugged. Her blue-green eyes sparkled with joy, and if Enzo smiled any bigger, his face would split. It was sickening and nice to see at the same time. The couple had battled a lot to get to this place.
"Five more months until the family expands and Aoife becomes a big sister. Are you ready for that, baby girl?" Aib cooed, holding out her hands as she took the baby powder scented bundle away.
"Where's the cake?"
"Colleen's going to bring it any minute now. They do pretty much almost everything for you here, but Aib made little goodie bags for us to set out and some gluten free muffins for kids who might have allergies."
"How PC," Snake said.
Enzo rolled his eyes. "Parent politics, man. It's the worst part of being a dad."
Snake smirked. He remembered that well. "I can imagine."
"I'd kill to see you as a dad, man. You wouldn't put up with the bullshit."
"It's a lot of give and take, raising a baby. Even the hardest motherfucker makes nice to keep their kid from being ostracized. Now I didn't say he'd take shit. Just that he would take care with his words and actions around those who'd hold it against the innocent. I see the struggle a lot with my brothers in the club who have kids. People think you're trash just because your old man rides a bike and belongs to a club. We set them straight. I feel bad for the girls. They seem to get it worse as they grow older."
Enzo's brow furrowed. "Damn. Kids are crueler than they used to be."
"Won't argue you with you there," he said. He peered around the room, taking in all of the activities full of levers, knobs, locks, and interlocking gears that turned. The bright colors, and overly friendly animals gave him the willies. He and Jade had been minimalists when it came to Jocelyn as an infant. There were plenty of solids, neutral colors, and prints for clothing and baby gear. They'd planned on stair-stepping them, so they didn't start buying all the pink and bows until she was older and began to show an affinity for certain things. His heart ached, and he glanced away from the sight of Aoife and Aibhlinn playing on a mat in the corner. Get a grip, man. You just got here. It'll be an hour before you can slip away.
Colleen stepped inside the building. He hurried from the room, using the excuse of helping her to cover for his abrupt departure.
"Let me take that for you, Colleen."
"Ach, thank you, sweetheart. You ready to face these rambunctious tykes?"
"I have a flask in my jacket, just in case," he replied with a wink.
She laughed, and he relieved her off the sheet cake featuring a pink puppet with ponytails on either side of her head. A plastic bag was tapped to the box with a wand and a crown for accessories. He shook his head. Girls get all the cool shit. Little boys never had swords and motorcycles.
A few minute later, parents began to arrive, and the chaos began.
§
I'm suffocating. He felt like a drunk stumbling onto his bike. He was a fish too long out of the water. His brain screamed for silence and numbness. The sounds of baby laughter had ripped his wounds open like a razor blade. He revved his engine, acknowledging to himself he was running scared. He hadn't been prepared for the all-consuming grief that had sucked him into a tar pit of depression. He pulled out of the parking lot relishing the wind and the feeling of being weightless. On his bike, he was one with everything. He could smell the night air, taste the dampness that came with impending rain on his tongue, and feel the cool wind blowing against him. Usually, the experience put him in a zone next to nothing could touch. Today, the ride wasn't enough. Visions of his curly-haired angel haunted him. Her broad smile, still chubby face, and sassy attitude were front and center in his brain. He pulled into a gas station and let his bike idle off to the side. Mike was prickly at best, and no one else knew his real story other than Data. Support. He pulled the telephone out of his cut and paused. Fuck it.
His fingers made the decision before his mind could talk him out of it. He placed the ringing phone to his ear and held his breath.
"Hello?"
"Hey, support, you busy?" he asked, careful to keep his tone light.
"Snake," she whispered. He closed his eyes, taking comfort in her kind voice. "Everything okay?"
"Not really. I could use some support myself tonight."
"Do you want me to come to you?" she asked.
"No, I'm at a gas station, and the club house is just too much to deal with right now."
"Y-you could come here."
"To your place, Sprite? You sure you want to risk scandalizing your neighbors like that?"
She snorted. "If anything, it'll get them to keep their opinions to themselves."
"Oh, you got a little rebel in you. I thought I saw it back at the clubhouse."
"Hah, I've never been called anything close to rebellious. I was a good little girl who wanted to please everyone, and followed every rule to a T."
"Sure ain't that now," he said, intrigued by the self-portrait she'd drawn with her words.
"No, I don't think I am. My place isn't much, but you're welcome here. I don't have any alcohol, but I can whip up a meal if you're interested."
"That's perfect, Sprite. This time, you feed me and I'll ply the bartender with alcohol."
She laughed and rattled off her address, telling him she'd see him when he got there.
As he parked his bike, he frowned at her apartment complex. He pictured her in something more upscale. She drove a BMW for Pete's sake. Survivor's guilt. You did just enough to get by. He'd lived a year in and out of hotel rooms for the same reason. At least she had the sense to wallow in one place. Climbing off his bike, he took the stairs two at a time to climb the two stories to her door. Part of him was damn near excited to see her. She sounded good on the phone, like her time at the club had worked wonders. That was normally the case with people coming onto the scene from clean cut backgrounds. She was a strange creature indeed.
He knocked on the door and rocked back on his heels. The sight that greeted him a few seconds later had his jaw ready to drop. She was dressed in a pair of body-hugging black jeans, fierce heels, and a fitted black vest that highlighted her full breasts.
"Are we going out to eat?" he asked, confused. No one walked around their house like this.
She laughed. "Nope, the sister-in-law, came over and played dress up with me." She stepped back. "Come on in." He watched her walk away and imagined her body lush and ripe for the picking. I wouldn't mind playing dress up sometime.