The Elites used to always sit at the table in the very center of the room, commanding everyone’s attention as their cackles echoed out through the cafeteria that’s more like a lavish dining hall in a fancy hotel. Always in the spotlight. Always the center of attention. The kinds of things that were beginning to fall by the wayside in the short period they were gone. But now here I sit with Emmett, and I have no fucking clue what to think about it.
“Why don’t they hate you?” I ask bitterly, pushing food around on my tray as I glare back at them resentfully. “It was your dad that led everyone into this mess, wasn’t it?”
“What makes you think they don’t hate me?” he suggests, completely unbothered and chowing down on his sandwich.
I watch them more closely, noting how their expressions differ from him to me. They look at him with glinting eyes, hoping he’ll glance in their direction. They jeer and taunt at me, and I know they’re thinking I shouldn’t be the one sitting here with him.
“They have stars in their eyes for you,” I reply. “They look at me like a bug that needs to be squashed.”
Emmett shrugs and continues eating. His cavalier attitude about it all is maddening. I would have expected his possessiveness to make him act a little more protective over me than this, but I guess that doesn’t apply to ex-girlfriends. The growing uneasiness inside gets larger by the second. I’m not so sure I can carry on ignoring them if he’s not going to lift a single finger to try and stop it.
“Couldn’t you try some of the things you used to do to me?” I ask in frustration. “Blacklist her? Have everyone ignore her or make her life hell until she backs off?”
His eyes widen, and I cringe at the hint of disappointment in them. “For as much as you’ve shamed me for how I acted towards you, now you want me to do the exact same thing to someone else? That’s rich,” he answers harshly, throwing a crumpled napkin down on his empty tray. “You know I only went along with all of that because I had to. Those are Vivian’s kind of tricks, not mine. Also…it’s unnerving that you’d look down on all of those things until they serve whatever purpose you have in mind. Whatever benefits you.”
I want to cry as he gets up and walks away without saying another word. For one thing, Vivian and Lily saw him looking tense and angry before storming off, and they’re currently delighting in the whole scene. Second, he’s right. And that makes Lily right, too. One day by his side in this school, and I am no better than Vivian.
“Emmett, wait!” I call out, getting up to chase after him. Vivian and Lily erupt in mocking laughter as I go, but I do my best to ignore them.
He’s already back in the hall by the time I catch up with him. I pull at his arm, but he barely stops for me. “What the hell!” I snap, taken aback by his behavior. “I know what slipped out from me was fucked up, but why are you acting this way? You humiliated me in there in front of them when you knew I was already on edge!”
He's fuming as he stares back at me, unable to respond.
“It’s not fair,” my voice cracks. “You two treated me like shit. Am I still bitter? Hell yes, I’m bitter. This whole thing is fucked up. But why are you acting like I’m the bad guy for being upset over all of this?”
“How long can you punish me for all of that?” He throws his arms up in exasperation. “I’ve told you…I can’t change the past.”
“I’m not asking you to change the past.” I swallow hard. “I’m asking you to fix things right now! And you’re too busy placating Vivian to even listen to me!”
“Look, you knew Vivian would probably be back at school eventually,” he snaps back. “This is only day one. If you can’t handle it now…how’s this going to work? I thought you were ready to deal with things like this when you…”
“When I what!?” I thunder, slamming my fists to his chest. “When I got myself into this with you? Right, but I didn’t exactly get myself into it, did I? You’re the one who came to me and roped me back in.”
“You knew what you were doing,” he smirks coldly.
“Obviously not,” I fume before turning on my heels and storming off.
He quickly runs up behind me and grabs me, spinning me back around to face him. He shakes me with both hands firmly gripping my shoulders. “You didn’t know what you were getting into?” he questions. “Is that what you think? You didn’t realize this was going to be hard? Fuck, Ophelia. I’m trying my best…but you know who I am. You know what comes with me.”
“Vivian?” I raise my brow sharply.
“We have a history. Yes. But that doesn’t have anything to do with you,” he argues.
“It does when she’s marching up to us in the halls and putting her hands all over you while you do nothing!” I scream.
He quickly puts his hand over my mouth to muffle my voice and jerks me over to a corner. “Stop acting this way,” he demands. “Everyone is going to be talking about this.”
“I thought you didn’t care about what everyone thought anymore!” I shoot back, still defiantly loud. “You’re right…this is just day one of her being back. Day one of you being back. And things are already like this. This obviously isn’t going to work!”
“What do you need?” he softens and pleads with me. “Tell me what to do, Ophelia. I can’t lose you. I just want you to be happy.”
I look away, shaking my head. I don’t even know what I want now. He was right. I knew what came with him and I knew what I was getting myself into. And I am just as stuck as he is. I don’t want to lose him either.
“I just want her to know you’re with me,” I answer quietly. “That you don’t want her anymore.”
He leans in and pushes his lips to mine. I respond urgently, pushing my tongue in between his lips. He pins me against the wall as he’s sucked into the kiss, and we both lose ourselves there for a minute before he finally pulls back.
“She knows,” he pants, looking down on me intensely. “That’s why she’s acting this way. She knows what happened between her and me doesn’t hold a flame to what you and I have.”
“How do I know for sure?” I push. “How do I know what you had doesn’t hold a flame to this?”
“How do you not know?” he gapes, looking disappointed. “You really think this is all just some game to me? That I’m just jerking you around?”
I shrug, looking down to my feet. I know he needs to hear me say I believe in him, that I believe in us. But everything’s happening so fast with all of them coming back here on the same day. It’s too much to take in all at once, and I’m terrified of things going back to the way they were before.
“I know you think it’s terrible,” I mutter. “But if you could just put her in her place somehow. Make her back off…”
His eyes widen and his hands pull back. I wince in anticipation of an explosion, but he freezes. His face drops in exhaustion. He purses his lips to the side as he looks around and then back to me, not knowing what to do. I am backing him into a corner—one he’s not used to being in. I don’t know what Vivian did when she was jealous of me, but it didn’t matter. Emmett had already made up his mind by then that he’d be with me if he could. Now I have him, and I’m not going to let her take him away.
“I need everyone to know you’re only with me now. That she doesn’t matter to you anymore,” I continue, rambling insecurely, pushing him closer to the edge. I know I should stop, but I can’t. I am too exposed and afraid of her coming between us.
“I don’t have time to worry about this high school drama bullshit!” he fires back through clenched teeth, the muscles in his neck straining. “I thought coming back here today and being with you would help take my mind off things with my sister, so I could think more clearly about what to do next. But now I wish I’d just stayed home alone!”
“I’m sorry,” I offer lightly, still not entirely won over by his argument. “I know you’re under a lot of stress, I just…I just wasn’t prepared to deal with Vivian today, much less to see her teamed up with Lily. And I wish there was something you could do to make them lay off.” He looks around despondently, still not offering to help in any way.
I do feel guilty and try to convince myself this is all trivial stuff I should just ignore. But I know Vivian and what she’s capable of. If Emmett doesn’t put a stop to it, it’s only going to get worse from here. I stand in silence, deciding not to keep pushing him while he’s like this. He murmurs something and walks off, leaving me standing alone and feeling terrible.
Of course, when I turn around Vivian and Lily are standing right there, watching everything. As I go to chase after Emmett, I accidentally turn my unzipped bag in the wrong direction, sending its contents scattering across the floor, including an assortment of condoms and tampons—the two worst things to be picking up off the middle of the floor with Vivian and Lily leering over me. They erupt into giggles, teasing me as I struggle to gather everything back together, but I drown them out.