“Yeah, it’s definitely a humdinger of a story. I think we only have beer.”
“Bloody beers will work. Let’s go.”
Grabbing my hand, she leads me down the stairway. As she prepares our tomato-based beverages, I confess to everything that happened with Roman. She’s on her second drink by the time I’m finished, giving me this expression like she still thinks I could be fucking with her.
“That’s…whoa.”
“Pretty much,” I say, dropping my head into my hands and setting my elbows on our little island. “Nothing like being forced to make a life-altering decision in a matter of a few hours.”
“I definitely wouldn’t want to be in your shoes. I mean I would, because the guy is so damn sexy that my ovaries throb with jealousy whenever I see him. I just wouldn’t want to make that kind of decision.”
Jaw dropped, I turn to her. “Excuse me? When do you see him? Have you been stalking my ex?”
“I don’t know that ‘stalking’ is the right term, Is. He’s been all over the music scene since Broken Euphoria first had that big hit. I know you’ve been going out of your way to avoid talking about him, so I didn’t say anything. But they’re a really big deal. Last I checked, the band had millions of fans on Spotify, and Roman was recently interviewed by NME.” Her dark eyebrows wiggle as she adds, “He also made a list of the fifty sexiest men alive.”
Now my ovaries are throbbing with jealousy. I’m not so sure I need that kind of shit in my life. A hot boyfriend with millions of women who would do anything for the chance to sleep with him? No thanks. The idea of other women touching him sets my stomach churning. Then again, I allowed that to happen when I cut him out of my life five years ago.
As I guzzle down the rest of my acidic drink, welcoming the warm glow it leaves in my belly, Mel nudges my shoulder. “I should warn you…if you're really going to that concert tonight, you may want to give the entire album a listen first.”
“Why?”
“Just…trust me.”
“Sweet.” I thread my fingers in my hair and tug, wishing we had something stronger than beer. “I should’ve asked him if I could bring you along as my emotional crutch. How the hell am I supposed to know the right thing to do? I spent half the night going through the options in my head and they both seemed…wrong. If I stay, I’ll regret letting him go a second time. If I leave, I’ll regret telling Stew, and Chaz, and all my students to fuck off. Vinnie, not so much.”
“You wouldn’t exactly be telling them to fuck off. You’re allowed to go after things that make you happy. I don’t see any reason why you can’t put everything on hold for a while.” Her expression changes like she’s waiting for me to deck her. Not that I would, but she’s seen me get livid in the past and she must be afraid what she’s going to say next will put me over the edge of reason. “Is…do you still love him?”
“I knew you’d ask that,” I grumble, rubbing calming circles into my temples. The pain of losing my parents may have lessened over the years, but that word still feels like poison on my lips. “Shit Mel, I don’t know. I want to, and I’m scared because I think it would be so damn easy to fall hard and get burned. Part of me will always cherish the boy from camp, but that was so long ago. And he’s changed.”
“But from what you’ve told me, it sounds like all those changes are pretty fan-fucking-tastic.” Again she wiggles her eyebrows before giggling. “Seriously though. If you ask me, I think you owe it to yourself to give this another shot. You guys were perfect for each other when we were kids, and I can’t envision anyone better suited for you than another rockstar. You guys could totally record songs together—be the next royalty couple in the music industry!”
Looking away from her bright hazel eyes, lit with excitement, I draw in a slow set of breaths. Those are basically the same reasons I had for wanting to accept his offer, but I still can’t stop worrying that I’ll be cheating myself out of the things I want. “What about my students?”
“Let him set up video lessons like he offered. I’m sure this concert is going to be a big moneymaker for him. He’s probably making millions in endorsements alone. I saw him on a freaking Hugo ad, Is. The man has money to spend on frivolous things.”
“I don’t know that I have enough money to keep me going for six months. He offered to fire his vocal coach and hire me instead, but I have no idea how much we’re talking. He said it’d at least be enough to pay you rent.”