Broken Little Melodies(46)

“I’d rather go somewhere quiet so we can talk without being bothered.”

Whether or not he’s implicating we do more than talk, the idea of doing something more has me soaking through my thong. At this point it wouldn’t take more than a light brush of his fingers to make me come hard and fast. I suck in a shaking breath and take a step closer, setting a hand on his hard chest to feel his ragged heartbeats. Pupils widening, he sets his somewhat chilled hand over mine. A shiver ripples through me.

“What happened to you?” he whispers, running his fingertips along the thick scar lining my jaw. “Why do you seem so angry? What made you leave me?”

My throat thickens with tears. “It’s complicated.”

His gaze is heavy with regret when he slowly shakes his head. “I’ve missed you so damn much, Belle.”

Then his other hand hooks around my waist and he draws me in until our bodies are pressed together. Oh fuck, he’s rock hard. And he’s so damn handsome. Looking into his eyes, my fragile heart can’t take any more. He deserves to know the truth, the reason I had to leave. But it’s like my brain and lips aren’t connected when I say, “I missed you too.”

“I’ll never forgive myself for hurting you in Vegas. If that’s why you left, I understand. I deserved it. I’d do anything to take back the shit I said. I was young and so fucking stupid.” Eyes closed, he bends to lightly nuzzle his nose back and forth across my cheek. “I let go of the best thing that ever happened to me and I wasn’t man enough to realize it was a serious mistake.”

My heartbeat elevates from his touch and the sincerity of his confession until I’m sure I’ll pass out. I don’t know how I stop myself from pulling him down and kissing the shit out of his gorgeous lips. I don’t know how I stop my hips from thrusting into him in search of much needed friction against my tingling body. It’s impossible to focus on anything other than the glorious sensation of being in his arms, even if it doesn’t feel quite the same as it did five years ago. He’s still my Roman.

I close my eyes, lost in his intoxicating scent. “Why are you telling me all this now when you’re getting ready to travel across the country?”

“Because I lost you once and can’t stand the thought of it happening again. We could take things slow until I finish the tour. I could fly back whenever I have a few days off, or—”

“We can’t simply pick up where we left off,” I insist, pulling away from him.

“Why not?” His eyebrows crinkle together as he shakes his head. “I know it’s been a long time—too fucking long—but my feelings for you haven’t changed. I still want you the way I did when we were kids. And I mean I want all of you—your body, your heart, your kindness, your ability to make me laugh and lift me up when it feels like the world’s gone to shit. There’s no one else like you, Belle. I’ve never met anyone who makes me feel the way you always could. No woman could ever take your place. I need you more than I’ve ever needed anyone. You’re the only family I’ve ever known.”

With every sweet thing that spills from his lips, I become irrationally irritated. Was our relationship always this one-sided? Was it always about me being there for him? I never told him the shit I was going through at home because I didn’t think he could handle the truth in addition to his own problems, especially when he couldn’t do anything to help from so far away. He was always the one calling the shots, reaching out when he needed me the most. What if I was merely his security blanket all along?

“You’ve always needed me,” I say, nudging him backwards. “Do you even understand the difference between need and love? I gave you my heart once and you annihilated it when you questioned whether or not I was a whore!”

“You’re right, I fucked up. I hated that you hung out in that place when I wasn’t around and there wasn’t anything I could do about it.” When he reaches for me and I don’t struggle, he drags me back into his arms and pushes his lips into my snow-covered hair. “Give me a chance to prove that I don’t just need you. Let me show you how much I want you. Let me worship you the way you’ve always deserved. Let me be the man worthy of your love.”

Suddenly he’s clutching me to him in a way that feels desperate, and I’m useless to fight. The logical part of my brain knows this is wrong, but that part is overruled by the bigger part that says fuck it. I need to see if he can make good on his promises, even if it’s my final demise.