Broken Dreams(100)

It was my turn to laugh, then rolled my eyes. “Yeah, right. I’m pretty sure she wants what is best for herself.” I thumbed over to Sophie.

“I thought you two were on good terms?” I looked over at Sophie. She was grinning. That grin aggravated me more and more every fucking time I saw it.

“I have mixed emotions about a lot of things,” I grumbled. He glanced at both of us.

“Right,” he said, softly. “Well, it’s getting late. We should all get some rest. We’ll finish packing up our supplies in the morning and then head out.” I looked at Claire and Nick, wondering if they were going to change their minds.

“Aye, aye, captain.” I saluted and turned around, heading for Henry’s bedroom.

I was halfway down the hall when I felt his cold hand grab my arm. I whipped around. “Can I help you?” He looked crushed, but I couldn’t help myself. I was still bitter and confused. I loved him, but my emotions were getting the best of me. I was pretty sure I wasn’t ready to be all kissy-kissy, lovey-dovey with him yet.

“I…uh…I just wanted to ask you something…” His anxiety was obvious.

“And what would that be?”

He looked down at his feet. I could see that he was unsure of himself. “Can I come back to our bedroom?” he whispered.

I took a deep breath. “I don’t know.” I could feel tears forming and my chin trembling. “I don’t know what to think. I know you’re hiding stuff from me. My heart wants to be with you, but I’m having a hard time wrapping my head around all of this.” I swallowed hard, trying to choke back my tears and that stupid lump in my throat.

“I understand why you feel that way. I wish I could give you more, but I can’t because I will lose you forever, and I cannot risk that. It will kill me if I do. You are my world.” He paused, while he wiped away his tears. “I will give you your space but, just so you know, I love you so much. So fucking much. I will always be there to protect you, whether you like it or not. And I will be waiting for you, should you decide to return to me.” Before I started bawling my eyes out, I turned away and left him standing there.



***



I was emotionally spent. As soon as my head hit the pillow, I was out. But, once again, I wasn’t asleep for long before I woke up from another vivid nightmare. I was drenched in sweat and was shaking all over. I looked over at Claire. Thankfully, I hadn’t disturbed her. She was nestled into Henry’s thick blanket, sleeping like a baby.

As I listened to her even breathing, I replayed my dream in my head. My mother was walking through the seedy part of downtown, where my apartment was, screaming my name. She was lost and looking for me. Her sobs felt so real to me that I could feel her pain. I grasped my chest. My heart ached for my mother.

I stood up and quietly put some clothes on. I looked out the window, and it didn’t look like it was going to be morning any time soon. I headed for the bedroom door. Claire rolled over when I turned the doorknob, but she didn’t wake.

The hallway was so dark. I was navigating it with my hands stretched out in front of me. I stopped briefly, with paranoid thoughts that an undead was going to jump out at me. Then I got to the second bedroom door. I wondered if Sophie and Henry had gotten together. I shuddered. I hoped they hadn’t. I was still possessive. He was still mine, and no one could have him except me. If she even thought about making a pass at him, I wouldn’t be responsible for my actions.

I gathered myself and felt my way down the hallway to the dining table. The packs were still on it. I searched one, finding a flashlight. Hoping Nick wouldn’t wake up, I turned it on. Henry’s keys were lying next to what I assumed was his pack. They all looked the same. Without thinking twice, I grabbed the pack and his keys, and left the apartment.

I was foolish not to check outside the door before I exited, but I wanted to get out of there and see if I could find my mother. I needed to find out if she was at her house. If she was, I could bring her back to Henry’s place and she could travel with us.

I could feel her. I missed her so much. Even if she had been a thorn in my side, she was still my mother and I loved her dearly.

I paused at the apartment building’s main entrance. I shined the light across the street. There were a few undeads roaming around. They looked like lost souls. I felt bad for them, but I couldn’t let my emotions get in the way again. Every time I did, I would freeze up. I needed to be alert.

I whispered to myself, “Breathe, Elaina.”

With the Sig in one hand, and keys in the other, I took a few deep breaths and opened the door. The truck wasn’t too far away from the entrance steps. I made a mad dash for it, and hopped in the driver’s seat. My nerves were dancing the jig all over my body. The first thing I noticed was that the truck smelled like Henry. It was that spicy body wash scent he had. He always smelled so good. I let out a long, staggering exhale.