“You don’t look right, Xavier.”
“I feel worse. Come on, let’s get inside.” He pulled her in, glanced around the parking lot, and shut the door.
“You want to tell me what’s going on?”
“You know my story. We got a tip from someone who had information on what happened. There’s a chance my Jocelyn is out there somewhere. I don’t know who has her, what her life has been like, or what she was told about Jade and me.”
His voice cracked. “I can’t stop thinking about it. I want to believe it, and then I don’t. If I get my hopes up, and it was a lie…” He shook his head and sank to his knees, burying his face in her belly. This was about so much more than the anonymous tip. This was years’ worth of pain finally spilling over. How long has he kept all of this inside?
“Whatever it is, I’m here for you. I won’t pretend to know what this feels like, but you’re not alone.” She kissed his crown, stroking his hair. “If she’s alive, I know you’ll move heaven and earth to get her back. Once you have her, the love you’ll pour into her will be the thing that truly matters.”
“What if it’s not? How can I ever make up for the ways I let her down? I let both of them down.”
“No, you didn’t. None of this is on you. Bad shit happens that we can’t control. All we can do is pick up after the storm blows through and find a way to keep moving forward. If she’s still out there, it’s a gift. You get a second chance to be a parent. That’s a precious gift, and no one I know deserves it as much as you. You’re incredible. Three months ago you didn’t even know me, and already you’ve worked miracles in my life. A child would be blessed to have you as a father.”
“I’m not so sure.”
“I am.”
He snickered and pulled away. “I look like a pussy all but sobbing all over you.”
“No, you sound like a man who loves his child. Nothing pussy about that.” Their gazes locked, and her mouth went dry. There is so much beauty inside this man. He rose, and she tilted her head back to maintain eye contact.
“I can’t believe you came down here.”
“I thought we were supporting,” she said.
“This goes beyond that.”
The air between them grew thick.
She cleared her throat. “Now we sleep. I have to get up in a few hours and drive back, and you need to rest.”
He blinked slowly and nodded his head. “There’s only one bed.”
She peered at the large bed. “I think we can manage.” She toed off her shoes, unzipped her jacket, and tossed it onto a chair. “Come on.” Grabbing his hand she tugged him toward the bed, sensing how lost he was. She slid beneath the covers faking the confidence she didn’t feel. The bed dipped under his weight, and he pulled her body toward his, wrapping his muscular arms around her.
“You’re so damn tiny,” he said.
“No, you’re just super-sized.”
He snickered and rested his chin on top of her head. “Thank you.”
“I’ll always have your back.”
“I’m starting to see that,” he murmured.
Silence settled over them like a blanket and drowsiness sucked her down into the blackness of sleep. It struck her odd that sleeping with him didn’t bother her.
§
She woke slowly. Long arms wrapped around her waist, and a heavy leg pinned her to the bed. What did I do? She forced her heavy lids open and took in the hotel room. The previous night returned to her, and she took a deep breath. It was just Snake. Her body relaxed. It’d been so long since she woke to someone else in bed.
Her bladder reminded her why she was awake. She wiggled, trying to loosen his hold, and when he rocked his hips in response to the movement, she felt something long and thick press against her ass.
She bit the inside of her cheek and swallowed back a moan. Now is not the time to remember how long it’s been since I had sex. An ache began in her center. She elbowed him gently. “I have to pee.”
He moaned and released her, rolling onto his back. She slipped from the bed and rushed to the bathroom, horrified by the direction her thoughts had begun to travel. The cold seat shocked her into consciousness. He’s vulnerable. He needs a friend. Finishing her business, she splashed water on her face, tamed her wild hair, and returned to the room.
“How are you feeling?” she asked, staring at the bearded man nursing a steaming mug of coffee in their bed.
“Better. Embarrassed as fuck. But better.”
“Good.” She peered at the old-school desk clock beside the bed. “It’s eleven. I’ll need to get out of here soon.”
He nodded. “I appreciate you coming down the way you did, Es. It…uh, meant a lot.”
“That’s what best friends are for.”
“Is that what I am?”
“It’s how I see you,” she replied honestly.
“It’s how I see you, too,” he admitted.
She beamed.
“Least I can do is feed you before you go,” Snake said.
“You don’t have to—”
“You’re eating before you leave,” he said, narrowing his eyes.
“I’m starting to wonder if you have some food fetish.”
“Only as it pertains to you. I want to fatten you up.”
She laughed. “Why?”
“Because you need it, girl. You were all skin and bones.”
“And now?”
“We’re getting there.”
She rolled her eyes. “I’ll let it slip since you’re hung-over.”
“And right,” he said.
“Hmmm.”
“This place doesn’t have much in the way of accommodations, but it does have room service thanks to the restaurant it’s connected to. What sounds good?”
“Oatmeal and toast?”
“With a side of bacon, and some fruit, check,” Snake said, making her laugh. He had a way of getting you to do what he wanted without being overbearing. I can see why he’s Vice President.
“Is it okay if I hop in the shower first?” she asked.
“Go for it.”
She grabbed her bag and wheeled into the bathroom. It was amazing how things had developed. What started off as a fluke had blossomed into a genuine relationship she considered vital to her sanity.
Too much food later she was back in her car with Snake draped over its frame.
“Are you sure you’re going to be okay?” she asked eyeing him carefully.
“Right as rain. At least, as much as I can be.”
“And you’ll call me if you aren’t?”
He smiled. “Yeah, Es. I’ll call. I don’t lose my shit too often. So I’m pretty sure I fulfilled my quota for the next year.”
“Smart ass. I worry.”
“You shouldn’t. That’s my job,” he said.
“I think it goes both ways,” she countered.
“Get out of here, and stop arguing with me, Sprite,” he growled and bent in, brushing her cheek with his lips.
Her face tingled and her belly clenched. Things were changing between them.
CHAPTER SEVEN
Snake
He stood in front of the familiar apartment numb. In just a few days his life had once again exploded. His face was numb, and his body was stiff from driving in the frigid weather. He’d spend the past two weeks hunting down Paul Smith, Jacob Sanders, and T.J. Perkins with his brothers. They’d all meet their maker, but not before confirming Hiram’s words to be truth.
Despite the torture, Hiram continued to hold his tongue. The old bastard knew it was the one thing keeping him breathing. How could he let him walk? This man was responsible for everything that happened to his family. How could he not? He ran a shaky hand through his hair. He’d set off on the road to clear his head and somehow ended up in front of Es’s door.
What right do I have to bring her into this? The more she knows the more dangerous it is for her. There was no one else he could bring this though. He knocked and leaned against the doorframe, suddenly exhausted. He’d been catching sleep in small three to four hour intervals, running on fumes and living off of junk. It all caught up with him now that he slowed down. Es opened the door.
“Oh, Snake.” A frown marred her rosy red lips. Has she been making out with someone? Anger that stopped just shy of rage descended. “You don’t look so good. Please come in.”
“You have someone else here?” His voice was low and gravely.
She blinked. “Well yes, but she was just leaving. Isn’t that right, Jole?”
“I’m not so sure I should,” a woman said.
He focused his attention on the older woman who stood with her arms crossed and her gaze full of contempt.
“This is him, right? Support. The one who has you working at Rain, and forgetting who you once were.”
“No one is making me do anything,” Es snapped.
“You can’t see it. But I can. I refuse to sit back and remain silent when I’m watching you go down a dangerous path.”
Her sister-in-law was a huffy, haughty bitch with a narrow view of the world. He knew her type. It didn’t bother him when people like her looked down on him. But he’d be damned if let anyone disrespect Es.
“I suggest you stop speaking before you say something you can’t take back. The only thing I’m encouraging Es to do is what makes her happy. You’re so desperate to get her back to where she was before the tornado, you never stop to realize she’ll never be that woman again. You think you’re doing what’s best for her? No, this is about you.”