He then walked around the bed and Blake stood. For the first time since I had known them, Blake and Gabe hugged. Not like their normal "We're men and men only pat each other" hug, but a true, genuine hug.
Both men looked overly emotional when they pulled away, and they didn't need to say a word to each other. That's how close they were. They knew exactly how the other felt without needing to voice the words.
Gabe made his way back toward me and reached out his hands. "Okay, baby hog. Give her up."
I laughed softly as to not shake Hope as I stood up and placed her in Gabe's waiting hands. I expected him to need some direction when he took her from me. I was prepared to give him the "Watch her head" speech, but much to my shock, he was a natural. He supported her head with the curve of his arm and sat down in the rocker with her bundled against his body.
He traced his finger down the side of her head and across her arm. When he reached her hand, she clung on to his finger and his eyes widened slightly. I knew it was a natural reaction for a baby to close their hand around your finger, but it didn't make the moment any less special.
Gabe leaned down close to her and spoke in a voice so low that only she could hear him. I desperately wanted to know what he was saying, but I knew this moment was important for them. He would become someone very special in her life.
I moved closer to Kat to give Gabe his space with Hope and began talking about the delivery. She joked that Blake seemed to have it harder than she did, and he grunted and crossed his arms while the rest of us laughed. Apparently Blake didn't handle his wife being in pain very well. I felt pretty bad for the poor doctors after Kat told us some of the things that he had said.
Two arms wrapped around my waist several minutes later, and I turned around to see Gabe standing behind me and Johnny now in the rocker with Hope in his arms. I placed my arms over Gabe's and gave his hands a squeeze. We talked to Kat and Blake few several more minutes before the nurse notified us that more visitors had arrived.
I kissed Kat on the cheek and gave Blake a hug before taking Hope out of Cash's arms and holding her close to me again. I promised her that we wouldn't be gone long and we would be just out in the waiting room. I already felt so protective of her. So attached. I couldn't imagine how her parents felt.
The four of us walked out of the room and notified Blake's parents and Kat's Uncle Gary that they were good to go inside. Johnny and Cash said their goodbyes, and Gabe and I sat down in the waiting room to wait for our chance to go back in.
When Kat and Blake asked us to be Hope's godparents, we were both ecstatic yet scared. I was honored that they would even think of me for that role, and I knew no matter what I would always love Hope, but the idea of being responsible for someone else's child was a big pill to swallow. What was even scarier was that I didn't know what was running through Gabe's mind.
We hadn't discussed having children again since the day he found Kat's pregnancy test, and I wasn't sure that it was a topic I wanted to broach. We were happy. Extremely happy. There wasn't a day that went by that I wasn't thanking God for bringing Gabe into my life, and I wasn't ready to rock that. What if he freaked out again? What if he told me the words that I already knew but didn't want to hear out loud?
Giving up having children for Gabe was something that I would do, but it would still hurt. When I was a little girl, I imagined what my life would be like when I became like my mother. I imagined a big house on the lake just like the one Gabe and I moved into just a few short months ago. I imagined an intimate wedding with a man I loved just like the one Gabe and I were currently planning. But most of all, I imagined my children running around the yard with their blond curls bouncing on top of their head. I imagined my life filled with laughter and love. I could still have that, it was just that it would only be between Gabe and I.
Gabe tucked a curl behind my ear as he looked down at me.
"What are you thinking about?"
"Nothing. Just Hope. She's gorgeous, isn't she?" I asked.
"She is." He smiled down at me.
"She is the most gorgeous thing I have ever seen."
"Not me," he replied while running his nose along my jaw.
My breath hitched. "No?"
"No. You holding Hope and looking down at her like you are in love is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen."
He placed a soft kiss against my lips which were stock still waiting for him to continue talking.
"I just kept thinking about what you would look like holding our baby. I thought about your body round with my baby inside you, and I haven't been able to think about anything since."
I pulled away from his touch so I could see into his eyes.
"You've decided that you want kids?" My voice was hopeful, but I couldn't help it. I was shocked by his words and there was no way to hide it.
"No. I want kids with you. I want everything with you."
And just like that Gabe Lawson flipped my world on its head once again. Everything I had ever wanted in my life seemed to be falling into place, but I never expected that I would fall so easily for Gabe. But I guess I never really fell, Gabe broke down my defenses in one fell swoop, and I crashed into him full force. My walls crumbled to the ground, and I had never been so happy to be broken. Actually, I loved it.
To my husband, Hubie: You always support me, even when I am sacrificing both of our sanities by chasing my dreams. You are my biggest cheerleader, my best friend, and my greatest love. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
To The World's Greatest PA, Heather Cavanaugh: How did I survive before I found you? You have become my sounding board, my right hand girl, and one of my dearest friend. Thank you for everything you do for me. I would be lost without you.
To Kathryn Dunaway: The level of support you give to me is beyond my wildest dream. Thank you for always sharing my books and for always being just excited as I am about what is next to come. I am forever grateful.
To Holly Renee's Renegade's: My girls! Thank you all for all of your support! I love having all of you on my side. You keep my spirits high, my laughter flowing, and a permanent smile on my face. I adore each and every one of you.
To my crazy family and friends: Thank you for always believing in me. I love y'all! Especially you, Jayleigh Faye!
To the bloggers: Thank you for everything you do! Your support is indescribable. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
To you, the reader: Thank you for taking a chance on me and my dream. I will never be able to repay you for your support.