I can’t get those images out of my head. He’s fine outside of a few broken bones and he’ll be back to work soon, but I relive the memory of him flying through the air and plummeting to the earth hundreds of times everyday. Before I drive myself crazy or fuck something up at work, I decided I would take some time away from the station and go full-time at my side paramedic job as soon as Collin returned to duty. As a fill-in captain for the station, those men need me to be a leader. They need to have faith in my ability to step in and take charge without being paralyzed by nightmares when I’m supposed to be shouting orders and saving lives. I am not a weak fucking man, but I know when I’ve reached my limit and need to call it quits for a while.
“So, you’re really going to propose to Finnley, huh?”
Collin smiles, his sights still zeroed in on his woman.
“As soon as she’s finished talking to those critics.”
He turns to face me. “I know you don’t agree with this, but I’m happy. She makes me happy. I can’t spend another minute without her and I want her to be my wife.”
I clink my bottle with his glass of whiskey and return his smile. “You’re a better man than me, McDaniels.”
He shakes his head at me and laughs before taking a drink. “One of these days, man, you’re going to find a woman who brings you to your knees.”
I choke on my sip of beer and Collin has to pound me on the back before I can breathe again.
Looking across the room, I see Phina talking to Dax Trevino. Aside from Collin, he’s the best man I know. I used to like the guy. He works as a detective for the Franklin Police Department and I’ve known him most of my life. We share the same manwhore status, one woman never being able to keep hold our interest for more than a few hours, and we’ve both been known to like our sex a little darker than vanilla. A few nights ago, we even shared the same woman. Sort of. He mostly sat there and watched while I did all the work, but both of us got equal joy out of watching Phina come apart in front of us.
Phina’s head tips back and she laughs, the smile she never gives me lighting up her face over something Dax just said to her. I suddenly have the urge to kick Dax’s fucking ass.
I’ll be damned if I let that woman bring me to my knees ever again.
I arched my back, the feel of his lips and tongue between my thighs almost too much for me to take. I wanted more; I couldn’t take anymore. Unfortunately, the brick wall of Dax’s chest against my back made it impossible for me to go anywhere. His arms tightened around me, holding me in place so D.J. could continue the sweet torture of his mouth.
I wanted this.
I asked for this.
I had no idea it would be like this.
My body was on fire and my skin flushed and glistened with sweat from so many orgasms. Three? Four? I have no idea how many times he brought me to release in the hour that the three of us had been on this bed, I only knew that I was dangerously close to another one and my body was shaking with a mixture of need and fear. I hated that he knew exactly how to touch me to give me what I craved. No one has ever known my body so well and for a moment, I thought about pushing him away and kicking him out of my bedroom. After one too many drinks when my defenses were down, he coerced me into telling him one of my fantasies. What woman hadn’t thought about what it would be like to be touched and pleasured by two men? I thought for sure my revelation would throw his ego into overdrive and he’d smirk at me, explaining that he was man enough to take on the job of five men. Much to my surprise, the corner of his mouth tipped up in a boyish smile and I found myself focusing on the dimple in his cheek, barely paying attention to his words when he told me he had a friend he trusted who would be more than happy to make my fantasy a reality. I watched his tongue trace over his bottom lip and imagined it gliding over my skin while I thoughtlessly nodded my head in agreement to whatever he was saying.
The plans were set in motion right there at the bar while I was still under the spell of vodka and his fucking sweet smile. Even after I sobered up the next morning and read the text he’d sent me in the middle of the night confirming that he would make my fantasy come true, I couldn’t change my mind. I couldn’t show him any weakness or he’d take it and run with it. Months went by and the chaos of what happened to Collin and Finnley consumed all of our lives, but DJ had never forgotten. He set up the time and the place and I had to follow through with this for the sheer purpose of shattering any ‘good girl’ illusions he might have about me. Phina the good girl died right around the same time my father first pressed a cigarette into my skin. As it continued through the years, and after a particularly brutal evening with my father and his cigarettes, I foolishly ran to DJ one night for comfort and he took everything I had to give without another look back.