He was trying to help, by making sure I was okay. If this was the first time I’d killed in basically cold blood, taking a life when mine wasn’t in immediate danger, he figured there was a chance I’d fall apart over it once I started thinking about it. I was fine, though, and didn’t want to talk about it, so I told him, “I’m thinking if I have an ice bag for my head and my leg, I’ll probably go back to sleep. This recliner’s pretty damned comfortable.” He looked at me another handful of seconds, and I added, “I’m not going to lose any sleep over it, Duke. He had to die. Even if I thought I could let him go and he wouldn’t come after me again, he’d seen you and Brain in your half forms at that point. They all had to die — I took one of them out. We don’t have to analyze the fuck out of it.”
He looked at me a few more seconds, and I could almost sense him smelling for a lie. He finally grinned and said, “Okay. There’s quite a movie library — I’ll put the TV remote on the table beside you, get you some ice packs, and leave you alone, but I won’t be far. Just say my name and I’ll be back.”
I explored the television’s menu, found the movies, and started a musical, but fell asleep not ten minutes into it, ice packs blissfully numbing the pain of both my leg and head.
Chapter Forty-Four
Harmony
In the three days it took us to make it to Jamaica, I got to know the guys better than I’d ever wanted to. We found poker chips and played poker for hours, we all yelled at movies as we watched them, and I eventually got used to them waiting on me hand and foot. Duke’s wife apparently likes salads, and he made me some nice masterpieces, but mostly they fed me steak and eggs, and some version of potatoes.
And lots of bacon in the mornings, though I was used to how much Brain could put away, so I didn’t bat an eye at the amount they ate.
When we made it close enough for cell service, I logged into a box not associated with me, and saw a message from Brain letting me know they’d taken care of cleanup, returned the plane to its owner, and would be joining us on the yacht for the trip to Mexico after I saw a doctor. I let him know the time the captain had informed us we’d dock, and told him a doctor wasn’t necessary.
My leg hurt like a bitch, but it wasn’t infected, and wouldn’t heal any faster with a doctor than without.
When we docked, Brain and Ranger were waiting to board, and I was so happy to see Brain, I cried. He carried me into the living area and ran everyone out so he could hold me and let me cry until I finished, without hurrying me.
All of the emotions of the past days came out once I was safe in his embrace, and I couldn’t stop the tears. He didn’t talk to me, didn’t tell me everything was okay, just held me and let me cry, and I loved him for it.
When I finally stopped crying, he kept holding me, and eventually he leaned down to give me a quick kiss on the lips, but I reached for his head, pulled it back down, and kissed him again. He soon took over, and I melted into him and let him kiss me silly. I wanted more, and more, but with my leg hurting, sex was out of the question for a while. I didn’t care, though. Just being back in his arms was enough.
When he stopped kissing me and held me again, I whispered into his ear, “I killed him. I didn’t torture him, it wasn’t about revenge. He had to die, or I’d have never rested easy, knowing he was out there.”
“I know, Buttercup, and I’m glad it’s behind us. Now we can look forward, to the rest of your life. The rest of our lives. You have a new face, new life, new name you can use on the grid.”
I pulled back and looked at him a few seconds before saying, “I’ve forgiven Duke, Bash, and Gonzo. They took care of me, played cards with me, carried me when I couldn’t walk, and got me into and out of the shower with attention to helping me stay covered, helping me keep my dignity.”
“They helped you in the shower?”
I could almost see the fur on the back of his neck standing up, could hear the growl in his voice.
“They helped me. Kept me from falling, helped keep my leg dry. I did the actual showering part myself, they just got me in, got the water right, sat me in the chair with my leg propped up, and the plastic around my thigh.” I gave his arm a soft punch. “Tell your wolf to get over it, already. Duke couldn’t help much, because he said Gen wouldn’t be okay with it since there was someone else who could help. Bash mostly helped me, and it was hard at first, but he tried really hard to make it as easy as possible on me.”
He just held me in answer, without saying anything. I had no idea what that meant, but I let it drop.