Bound to Please(44)

She put a hand to her heart, which had started to ache. Because she knew, all too well, what it was like to be with a man like this. A man obsessed with something greater than life, always searching for meaning through his art. Why did she always fall for these types of men? Writers, photographers, musicians; each one thinking they were so special they needed to contribute to the culture-at-large and, of course, that was much more important than any relationship could ever be.

For once, she didn’t want to be second to the art. She wanted to be the art. She wanted to be the center of someone’s universe.

Maybe that’s what she’d been looking for when she’d posed for Ash; maybe she thought that she could be both: the love and the art, all mixed into one bound, naked bundle.

Oh, how wrong she’d been.

Yvette looked up and caught her eye. Gone was the glare Ruby had witnessed that first night, but now Ruby saw something else, something worse. Sympathy.

Turning on her heel, Ruby walked out the door, knowing Mark would never even realize she’d been there.

The phone was ringing when she got home that afternoon. She ran into the kitchen and grabbed the receiver off the wall. “Hello?”

“Hey, Ruby Tuesday. Watcha doing?”

Dropping her bag onto the old Formica dining table, Ruby smiled. “Claire Bear! What’s goin’ on?”

She heard the clinking of dishes in the background. “Not much,” Claire said. “I’m on a break and thought I’d see what’s up with my big sis.”

Ruby and Claire were closer than most sisters. Even when their mom had been around, she’d been distracted with their huge circle of friends, and Ruby had taken on the role of mother from the time Claire was born.

Ruby dropped into a chair. “Pretty good. I miss you.”

“You too.”

“When are you going to give up this acting business and come home?” But Ruby was kidding. More than anything, she just wanted Claire to be happy, even if it meant her thirty-four-year-old sister was a barista at Starbucks while she waited for her career to take off. But Claire was talented. It would happen, Ruby knew it would.

“Well, I do think I’m overdue for some Ruby time. I’m going to come up for a visit,” Claire said.

“Oh, I would love that. When were you thinking?”

“I was thinking toward the end of the month. Would that work?”

Ruby pulled a calendar out of her handbag and flipped it open. “Oh, you have to come after this big event I’m doing, or I’ll be too swamped to spend any quality time with you. Have you heard of the Dark Riders?”

“Um, yeah? The clubs in L.A. play that single all the time.”

Ruby couldn’t help the little smile playing around her lips. Every time she heard something positive about Mark’s band she felt proud of him.

“Well, I’m planning a show and they’re playing. Can you come after that?”

“Sure. So have you met them? That Mark St. Crow is fucking hot.”

“Yeah, he is.” She sighed. “He really fucking is.”

“Ruby Tuesday. You have met him. And, if my instinct is correct, you’ve done more than just meet him.”

Her sister knew her too well, could pick up on any little nuance in her voice. That thought wiped the smile off her face; the last thing she wanted was for Claire to know the nature of her relationship with Mark.

Ruby had managed to keep the bondage photographs a secret, and Ruby didn’t want Claire to find out about them. Ever.

“Ruby? Are you gonna spill about this guy or what? My sister’s dating one of the hottest guys around, and she won’t tell her own sister. Very rude.”

Ruby focused on a peeling piece of floral wallpaper. It was vintage, and she hated the thought of having it replaced. Everything in this building was original, which was why she loved the place so much. The history made it feel solid, grounded. All the things she’d never had growing up.

With her fingertip, she traced an abstract pattern on the gold-speckled tabletop. “Mark is nice, and if he was older, not a musician, lived in my time zone, and wasn’t surrounded by beautiful women all the time, I might consider dating him.”

“Oh, Ruby. First of all, you’re gorgeous. And the beautiful people thing? Trust me. That gets real old real quick.”

Ruby shrugged. “Maybe. Regardless, even if I did have a crush on him, it wouldn’t matter. It would never work.”

“You’ve been saying that your entire life.”

“And it’s never worked.”

“Maybe that’s because you go in telling yourself the relationship is doomed,” Claire said.

“I dunno. All I know is that I’m thirty-seven and I keep picking the wrong guys.” The gold pattern twisted and turned under her finger.