"I'm getting married," she said, barely able to manage the words. When she was with her fiancé Scott, she felt no hesitation in saying those words. She loved him. But standing before Gage made the words seem forced from her mouth. "I thought you should know."
"Why?" His cold and distant stare might've fooled another, but Elise knew beneath that cool exterior burned a passion that distance and time had not squelched. Perhaps it had been foolish to come here but she'd known in her heart, she wouldn't be able to walk down that aisle, dressed in white, to pledge her heart to Scott when another had already staked their claim. She needed closure. At least that's what she'd told herself as she'd purchased her plane ticket to Colorado and lied to Scott about her trip.
She'd called it business. Well, it was … of sorts.
Scott, bless his naïve heart, had bought her lie without reservation. And why wouldn't he? Elise had been lying to the poor man from the beginning.
"I need … " Oh God. How could she say the words? How could she tell Gage that she needed him out of her system so she could marry another? It seemed wrong … but not as wrong as the secret between them. She swallowed. "Gage … I just needed to see you."
His blue eyes - eyes she remembered roaming her body with a fever that no aspirin could ever cool - flashed and hope lit up her belly like a Fourth of July sparkler. After what seemed an eternity, he broke the tense silence with a shake of his head, his expression softening by the barest of margins. "Elise," he murmured with a hint of anger. "You should've stayed away."
She nodded. "I know." God, how she knew. "But I couldn't."
"Does he know?"
"Of course not. And he will never know."
A smile that flirted with cruelty lifted the corner of his mouth. "Why not? Your beloved doesn't deserve to know that you were once in love with your brother."
"Step brother," I whispered, tears filling my eyes at how casually he spoke of the thing that held us both hostage. And she knew with a fatal certainty that she was still in love with Gage no matter that she could never truly have him. She lifted her chin. "Scott is a good man. He treats me well and I'm a lucky woman."
"I know," he said, surprising her. She raised startled eyes to his. "I may be far, but I can't help myself it seems when it comes to you. If he wasn't worthy of your love … I'd never allow this wedding to happen."
"How did you … ?"
"Elise," he said, his tone faintly patronizing. "I make it my job to know what is happening in your life. My promise to you was that I would stay away, not that I would stop caring. I've held up my end of the bargain … you, on the other hand, have broken it by coming here."
"I'm sorry," she admitted, knowing she was taking a risk. "I just need some closure so I can start fresh with Scott."
"And you thought coming here was going to accomplish that?" he mocked, shifting in his chair. The movement reminding her of a jungle cat, all sinewy and muscle beneath the silk of his skin. The subtle nod of her head was her only answer. She was too busy undressing him in her mind to form too much of a valid argument. The fact was, she had no business coming here tonight. It'd been pure lunacy to board a plane to the one man she needed to keep from her life. They were two people who could never be together. The fallout would devastate so many. Which was why Gage had moved to Colorado and Elise made a point to be out of town on the rare occasions that he visited. "And what kind of closure are you needing, sister dear? I moved three states away. I never call … aside from disappearing from this planet, I'm not sure how I could further accommodate you."
"Stop being a cold prick," she said.
"Stop being a tease," he countered, his eyes hard. "There's only one reason you would show up unannounced with that look in your eyes … you came to get fucked. As if one last time would ever be enough between you and me. We both know the answer to that, which is why I moved away. I tried to make this easier on us both. We need that distance to protect our family from ourselves. The devastation would be horrific. We both agreed, it wasn't worth it."
Tears tingled behind her eyes. Everything he said was true. His father, her mother, their blended siblings … the fallout of their love affair would shatter their family if discovered. But she knew there was no way in hell she could let Scott completely into her heart when Gage was so firmly planted there. "I can't marry him without this," she said, tears falling from her eyes. "I can't. Believe me when I say that I love him but when I close my eyes at night, you are there. You're in my dreams, my nightmares, my waking moments. I can't seem to escape the memories or the desire that haunts me." All mocking fled from his expression and he seemed as stripped bare and vulnerable as she. In that moment, they were equally miserable, wanting the one person who was off-limits for so many reasons. "I can't have you. So I will build a life with this man and have his children but tonight, I need you. I need you to help me say goodbye to the past so I can move on with my future."
"What you're asking … it won't help. It will only make things worse," he said hoarsely. "It will awaken a beast that's been fitfully sleeping since the day I left California. I've built a life here … away from you … and it has taken every shred of self-control to keep from dragging you back to Colorado with me, damn the consequences! And now you show up, begging me to fuck you so you can forget me?"
Shameful, hot tears coursed down her cheeks. The truth was certainly uglier when verbalized than when hidden behind private justifications but she held his gaze without flinching. "Yes," she admitted, not bothering to wipe away her tears. Let him see how much she hurt inside to ask. Let him know nothing she said or did came without cost. "I'm only here until tomorrow. My flight leaves at 10 a.m. We have twelve hours to get each other out of our systems. Then, I'm going to board that plane, sore and bruised in every way, and I'm going to forget anything ever happened between us, now or in the past. You will do the same. I will marry Scott and you will find someone you can love without restrictions. Someday, we might even be able to face one another as we should … as brother and sister."
"You're living in a dreamland," he said bitterly. "There is no one for me but you."
She closed her eyes. "There has to be. There will be. But not as long as you have me in your heart."
"This is -"
"The only way," she cut in, more sure than ever before. She advanced, resolve emboldening her step. Her nerves were suddenly calm, but excitement fluttered in her belly. She held his stare, murmuring with promise. "Time is wasting, my brother. And I need you. Now."