Bones of the Lost(4)
Drawing a lungful of fresh air, I slid into the seat.
“Lord in heaven, doc. Don’t know I’ve seen anyone that ratty in years.”
“You should get out more.”
“What the hell were you—”
“Mud wrestling. Pull over there.” I pointed to where my car was.
“Hate to see the other guy.”
“I’ll post a video on YouTube.” I jabbed an impatient finger in the direction of the big SUV.
Slidell proceeded as directed.
“Stop!” My hand came up. “No, up behind that van.”
“I know what happened. Some dude tuned you up for trying to boost his car.”
“If I could boost a car, I wouldn’t be here.” I hopped out. The blisters looked like two red eyes staring up at my face.
If the bracelet hadn’t been a gift from Katy, I’d have cut my losses and split. Someday I’d tell her about this. Then we’d laugh. Maybe.
I slid between my car and the blue mammoth, eyes on the pavement. Bingo. The bracelet lay beneath the two abutting mirrors, in the least accessible spot possible.
Sucking in my gut, I wedged between the door handles and down into a squat. Shoulders twisted sideways as far as they would, I reached out and snagged the bracelet. Then, careful not to set off alarms, I hauled myself up and made for the Taurus.
Slidell watched my performance without comment. Apparently I’d crossed the line from amusing to pitiable.
I got in and slammed the door.
“Where to?”
“The ME office.” Snapping the bracelet onto my wrist.
“Happy to swing by your crib.”
“My house key is in my purse. In my car.”
“Shoe store?”
“No, thank you.” Curt.
“No problemo. I’m headed back there anyway.”
I could have asked why. Instead I sat facing the side window, attention focused on blocking the olfactory record of Slidell’s passion for the deep-fried and overgreased. Of coffee supporting white colonies of mold. Of sweaty sneakers and oil-stained caps. Of stale smoke. Of Skinny himself.
But I wasn’t exactly aromatic either.
Slidell exited the deck, kinked over to East Trade, and hung a left.
Several minutes passed in silence. Then, “Who snuffed Fluffy, eh?”
I had no idea what that meant.
“Who popped the pooch?”
Great. Slidell knew about my mummy bundles. More grist for the comedy mill.
“Who capped the—”
“I’ve been asked to examine four sets of remains to verify that they are nonhuman. Should that be the case, archaeologists will date, authenticate, and send the materials on to . . . somewhere.”
“Why’s this litter of dead Chihuahuas—”
“The bundles are from Peru, not Mexico.”
“Yeah, sure. So, how come these pooches get the ME treatment?”
“Customs officials snagged them at the airport. Some bonehead’s been accused of smuggling them into the country. The illegal import of antiquities is a crime, you know.”
“Ee-yuh.” We rode a few more moments without talking. Then, “Ol’ Dom Rockett got lassoed by the feds.”
Though curious, I waited, knowing Slidell would expound.
“Dom Rockett, king of folksy shit from around the world.”
“The whole world?” I couldn’t help myself.
“South America, mostly. Our amigos down there got enough shit for the world.”
Slidell is definitely fair-trade offensive.
“Junk bracelets, rings, crap to loop around your neck. Llama-mama shawls, wall hangings. Fleas from overseas.”
“You’re a poet, detective.”
“Word is ICE thinks Rockett’s expanding his horizons, maybe branching out to include real antiques.” Slidell was referring to the U.S. Department of Homeland Security’s Immigration and Customs Enforcement. “Unreported ones.”
I said nothing.
“Wouldn’t surprise me. The guy’s pond scum.”
“You know him?”
“I know of him. Scum knows scum.”
I didn’t ask what that meant.
“Can you turn up the air?”
“Feet won’t get cold?” Deadpan.
I shot Slidell a don’t-go-there look. Which was pointless, since the Ray-Bans were fixed on the road.
Slidell reached out and flipped a button, then hammered the dash with the heel of one hand. A blue light flickered and tepid air oozed from the vents.
“If what you say is true, Rockett might have thought he could sell the mummy bundles to a museum,” I said. “Maybe a private collector.”
“I’m sure ICE will be querying his ambitions. Turd will roll on whoever he’s dealing with.”
Past I-77, West Trade swung west, then cut east again. Slidell took the curve fast, shooting paper bags and carry-out cartons across the floor in back. My mind threw up images of foodstuffs long gone. Fried chicken? Barbecue? Scavenged roadkill?