But the fear he had that he would end up like his father was strong. Just like Jasha, Erik knew he’d give everything he had to Piper, and more than likely she’d see his worthlessness and leave, taking it all with her. Erik would put money on the fact that Jasha believed that Katria was there for him, too, and she left. Whenever his mom broke his father’s heart, Erik would take the brunt of his father’s anger and end up going to school with a part of him broken or beaten. That was the life he lived; that was the love he knew.
He couldn’t subject their child to that; he had to stay away from Piper.
He just had to.
Chapter 15
Piper had her arm around Erik’s waist and a grin on her face as they stood on the porch waving at Cooper and Alla. Erik’s arm hung loosely around her shoulders, and he had to fight everything inside of him not to hold her even tighter. After their tender moment yesterday, he found himself craving that feeling again. The whole night he lay, tossing and turning on the couch, wanting to run in there and tell her she was right, that he was an idiot and to please hold him.
He felt safe in her arms. And that bothered him because this was not real. He had to leave after the baby was born, but she was making it so damn difficult.
“Hey, guys!” Alla yelled as she jumped out of the car, waving widely at them. Erik smiled at the sight of her. His love ran deep for Alla—she was there for him even when he was fucking things up, just like someone else he knew, Erik thought, as he looked at the girl standing beside him.
When his dad stepped out of the car, he smiled and Erik actually felt a sense of calmness come over him. Cooper was a smart man and would help him sort through all the feelings he didn’t understand, feelings for his wife and baby boy.
“Hey!” Piper called out to his parents as they approached the steps to their porch.
“I’ve missed you so much!” Alla embraced Erik, giving him a smacking kiss and a tight hug.
“Jesus, Mom,” Erik said with a laugh, kissing her again. “I’ve missed you, too, but it hasn’t been that long since I saw you last.”
Cooper laughed, too, as he pulled Erik into his arms. “Any time away is too long in our opinion.” Erik closed his eyes as he hugged the man he loved and respected most in this world. Pulling back, Cooper asked, “Good?”
Erik shrugged as he smiled. “Eh, okay.”
“You’ll be good by the time we leave.”
Piper stood with her hair blowing in the wind and a bright smile on her face. The dress she wore was long, and she was gorgeous; Erik never got tired of looking at her. Piper giggled as Alla pulled her into her arms, too.
“My goodness, I think our grandson wants out!” Cooper laughed, embracing Piper.
“I have popped out a bit more since the last time you saw me. Wait till you see the ultrasound video! He’s beautiful. Oh my, he has my cheeks, Erik’s nose, he is just perfect!”
“We can’t wait. Come on, let’s get inside. It’s hot as Hades out here,” Alla gushed, hooking arms with Piper as they walked in the house. Cooper wrapped his arms around Erik’s shoulders and they followed behind the two women. Having the two people who knew him best with the person who was breaking down his walls was scary as hell.
* * *
“Oh my God, I just can’t wait to squeeze him and love him to pieces! Oh, Cooper, I want to go shopping!” Alla exclaimed as she held Piper in one arm and Erik in the other. Erik wanted to die of embarrassment from the way his mother was acting while watching the ultrasound video, but it felt good to be in her arms.
“Sure, Alla, we aren’t busy trying to move or anything.” Cooper laughed as he held some of the ultrasound photos in his hands.
“Oh, poo, you are ruining all of my fun,” Alla teased as she turned to Piper. “Don’t worry, we’ll go shopping together.”
Piper nodded. “I would love that, Alla.”
“Well, you are family, darling.”
Erik’s heart hurt when he saw the tears gathering in Piper’s eyes. She took in a deep breath and nodded again.
Erik had to look away. This was all becoming too real, too painful, and he was frightened.
You would have thought this was her first grandchild. His mom talked their ears off about baby stuff and her excitement about moving to Nashville to be close to all of her children.
With a shake of his head, Erik pulled out his phone to mess with as he listened to their background chatter, but soon stopped when Alla asked, “So, have you thought of a name?”
Erik looked over to see Piper with a small smile on her face. “We haven’t really discussed it, but I’d like his middle name to be Blake, after my dad.”