“What?”
He shakes his head, kissing my forehead and letting me go so he can grab dinner. He pulls it from the oven, making me suspicious as to what is in the large casserole dish. “No, the first time I saw you was in New York at the UN building. You were summoned to be a bodyguard to a visiting dignitary. You looked through me, like you never even saw me.”
“What were you doing there?” I recall the duty, but not Dash.
He grins. “Your security clearance doesn’t go that high.”
I roll my eyes and take my seat. He places the dish down, taking the lid off slowly. I smile instantly when I see enchiladas from Emily next door. “You dick, I thought for sure you’d cooked up some kind of concoction.”
“Not a chance. I got home, and she rushed them over. Gave me this lime mayonnaise to put on top of the sour cream.” He grabs the dishes and sits across from me, his green eyes dazzling. “Now that I have your attention, I want you to swear to me that you will come to Virginia for Christmas.”
I glance at the dish, fight the bursting smells attacking my nose with tempting scents, and look at the front door. He has me trapped. “Fine, I’ll come.”
He smiles wide, dishing me up two huge enchiladas. “She said you would be difficult when I told her.”
“Who?” I lean over the plate, smelling the steam as he passes me the salsa and sour cream.
“Emily. I asked if she could take care of Binx while we went, and she laughed at me. She said taking you in was like slowly winning over a stray cat, and my mom would have better luck charming a python.”
I grin, not insulted in the least. “See, she knows me at least.”
He lifts his glass of sangria, forcing me to put down my fork and lift mine. “To you, my savage fiancée. I am so grateful you said yes.”
“To Binx, for always being crabby unless he wants something.” I scowl and lift my glass just a little higher.
Dash chuckles, giving me the lopsided grin. “You’re a pain in the ass.”
“I know, but you love me so you’re sort of stuck with me.”
He winks. “And your little cat too.” I blink, realizing he’s told a joke and I’m meant to be laughing. He sighs and takes a bite, moaning into his fork. “I don’t care what you say all night, nothing can ruin this moment. You are wearing my ring, meeting my mother, and this food is ridiculous.”
My evil stare-down doesn’t last when I start eating. He grins at me from across the plate. “You glad we got a backstory now?”
I lift my middle finger into the air. “Shhhhh. Don’t wreck this.”
He shakes his head. “You’re getting it after dinner.”
I grin back, desperately hoping I am getting it. We both look down at my hand resting on the table. A goofy smile crosses his lips, forcing one across mine. He sighs, and I can see there is some kind of bliss going on behind those eyes and I’m the one who put it there. That has to be some sort of miracle. I took it each day at a time for a year and still ended up here, in a committed place where there is no doubt that one day we will be those golden-retriever people. We’ll have a boxy SUV and a house with grass all around it. Because that’s the sort of monster he is. The worst kind, really. I almost can’t wait for tomorrow when I take a mind ride into that unconscious girl. I can’t wait to free the other girls. It will be my last time doing something dangerous, my last trip down into the gutters.
And then I will try very hard to be like him. I suspect even if I can’t be exactly like him, he won’t care. I got one thing right about him in the mind rides where I created his alter ego. He has one tremendous trait in common with Derek, my made-up version of him. He will love me for who I am, because that’s who he is. So if I only offer an inch, he’ll take it and wait for me to give more. He’s generous with his love and feelings, in an awkward way, and he’s patient with me.
His eyes see through my grin. “Tomorrow I will be at your side the entire time, okay?”
I nod. Just a little bit excited.
We do dishes, flicking each other with soap and laughing as Binx earns himself a bubble cap. He paws and shakes until it’s gone and then struts off indignantly.
We make love in our way that really has nothing to do with making love, but it works, especially in the dark where we aren’t accountable for the things we want.
We go to bed.
It’s the makings of a very beautiful life.
I sleep cocooned in him, safe from the world out there where we have to make choices and be strong.
When I wake, it takes a second for the haze to slip from my mind. I nearly forgot I was doing a mind ride today. I shower and get dressed into something comfortable. His eyes don’t leave me, stalking me throughout the house. I know he’s worried, but I’m not. When we arrive at work, he’s tense. He gives me a peck on the cheek and whispers, “See you in the dark.”