Seamus started to weep.
“Fuck, I love you,” he said through his tears. “Nobody ever talks to me the way you do; nobody surprises me like you do. And thank you, for all of that.”
“So do you want the business update?”
For once, Seamus was grateful for the deflection.
“Sure,” he chuckled, wiping his nose with his wrist. “Lay it on me.”
“The studio gave your role to Ethan Carpenter,” she began.
“Oh, shit, that’s hilarious. He’s way too young.”
“Well, not now that they’ve turned it into a CGI-laden generic tween flick. They had to scramble to save money after your incident, and that’s how the bean counters decided to go.”
“Hey, it’s their two hundred million bucks. They can blow it however they want. Is he still dating Billy?”
“Oh God no. He’s had to go back fake-straight to steal your job.”
“Of course he did.” Seamus scowled. “Is Billy okay?”
“Uh, well, he’s been hanging out with Bluey. A lot.”
Seamus rolled his eyes.
“Why doesn’t that surprise me? Actually, it kind of does. What a dynamic duo. Anyway, what about you?”
“I have my own office at Gaynor’s, and I have clients. Gaynor’s so much happier now that she’s not representing Zetta anymore, and that whole scandal pretty much blew over for her. Not so much for Zetta. He can’t get hired for shit, but hey, he’s the most popular meme on the Internet. The tagline goes ‘It’s okay to love Jesus, but…’”
Seamus laughed and took Nicola’s hand, rubbing his thumb absently on her palm.
“Are you and Bluey on good terms?”
“Yes, we are,” she said. “It was points in his favor that he’d been trying to get you to quit for years.”
“Yeah, he’s a good guy.”
They sat in silence for a long time, looking at the pool. Nicola leaned her shoulder against his.
“We really almost became something, didn’t we, lass?” he said, his voice mournful.
“Maybe, sure.”
“I’d say it was more than maybe,” he said.
“That’s because you’re an actor and you’re used to getting your way,” she said seriously.
“Ouch,” he said, pulling back slightly.
“See?” she laughed. “That’s why I can’t date an actor. You guys take yourselves too seriously.”
“Yes, Nico,” Seamus said with a sly grin. “I’m exactly the same as everyone else in my profession. And no, generalizations and exaggerations never get old with me. Never.”
“That’s better,” she smiled. “And yes, if it helps, I think we were on the verge of being something, but now we’re on the verge of being something else.”
“Well, at this point in my recovery, I’ll settle for anything that keeps you around me. I’m happy that you know I love you, even if you aren’t sure about little old ex-junkie me.”
“Thanks, O’Riordan,” she said. “It’s been a hell of a ride.”
“That it has, Wallace,” he said, kissing the top of her head. “That it has.”
* * *
An hour later, Seamus returned to his room. He sat on the embroidered quilt on his bed and burst into tears. He let the sobs wash over him and he felt the pain in his heart grow and grow instead of wearing out. He punched his fist over and over into the quilt as the tears continued to flow. He had never been this much of a crier before Nicola.
His breathing started to calm, and he shook off the last wave of sadness and looked up at his dresser. He saw himself in the mirror, his face puffy and red, and streaked by salty tears.
“What the fuck are you crying about?”
He looked up. SaraBeth Shields was standing in his doorway in dirty white shorts and a plain black T-shirt.
“Hey, this isn’t a good time.”
“Tell me about it.” SaraBeth walked in. “I just had a visit from fucking Amber Bank. I’ve been cast on her fucking reality show. My agents signed the deal already. I can’t get out of it.”
“Well, I guess that could make your day worse.”
“I saw you with your girlfriend just now.”
“Did you then?”
“She fucking assaulted me at Freddy’s. You shouldn’t date her. She’s a boring, hungry tiger.”
“You sound just like Amber.”
“Yeah, she just visited me. I just told you that. They’re shooting scenes where she’s pretending to be my sober coach.”
Seamus laughed bitterly. SaraBeth was more fucked than she knew.
“Anyway, movie star, she asked me to give you this.”